Posted by: Jack 19th December 2019, 10:00 AM
This is getting absolutely dragged online, the reviews are hilarious! 
Some calling it 'overly horny' and an 'absolute nightmare'. Think this might bomb at the Box Office too!
https://variety.com/2018/film/news/jennifer-hudson-taylor-swift-james-corden-cats-movie-andrew-lloyd-webber-1202879375-1202879375/
A movie version of Andrew Lloyd Webber's musical Cats has been in the works for a while and after speculation over the last day or so, Taylor, Jennifer Hudson as Grizabella, Ian McKellan & James Cordon have all supposedly been cast! This is directed by Tom Hooper (Les Miserables, The King's Speech) and set to come out late 2019 (filming late this year)!
I'm SO excited for this <3
Taylor barely has one vocal chord, and cannot act her way through a 3 minute music video.....J-Hud could fart and it'd have better vocal control and can act.
The trailer is out for this and it’s absolutely horrifying.
Oh my gosh, that looks creepy, like REALLY creepy. I mean I can understand that bipedal look for a stage musical, but this is film, what's the problem with making them look like, y'know, REAL CATS or just straight out animated cats?! I mean anything's better than that horror.
This still looks awful even without that though, Taylor Swift, James Corden and Jason sodding Derulo acting is enough to prove that. A shame as they seem to have also gotten some really good names as well.
I couldn’t believe when Jason Derulo’s name came up
I also can’t believe this is from the same director as Oscar nominated movies like Les Mis and The Kings Speech.
But you can bet I’m excited to see it as soon as it’s released, just to see how awful it is in full..
This trailer just has to be a parody/skit or something? No way anyone actually thinks this looks even remotely good. The backlash this trailer has received is probably absolutely mortifying for anyone connected to this project lmao. Creepy is an understatement.
omg i think the Jason Derulo one is the weirdest, it feels like his facial features are coming off the ‘cat’
This could have easily been fine with prosthetics. I wonder if they were worried they couldn’t find the right level of star power to sit through the hours of prosethetics it would have taken though.
Delete
So I’m the only one in the world who thought this trailer looked good?
Never seen Cats, but I’ll definitely be seeing this.
This is getting absolutely dragged online, the reviews are hilarious! Some calling it 'overly horny' and an 'absolute nightmare'. Think this might bomb at the Box Office too!
Is anyone surprised lmao
The reviews will be 10x more entertaining than the movie I guarantee it, all that’s left to see is which godawful movie (this or Star Wars) hasnt slaughtered its legacy
Oh I think this will be huge and the reviews won't matter. It'll be good counter-programming to Star Wars and I think a lot of people will be interested in seeing it just to see for themselves how bad it is
Initially I think it'll do well but just look at how 'Last Christmas' has fell off due to bad reviews, I think it'll probably do similar to that.
Enjoy:
Boston Globe
My eyes are burning. Oh God, my eyes.
Collider
Can you make a movie so bad that the Academy takes back your Best Director Oscar? Asking for Tom Hooper.
The Beat
Cats is the worst thing to happen to cats since dogs.
Hollywood Reporter
Cat-astrophic.
LA Times
"Cats” is both a horror and an endurance test.
Slashfilm
There is a thin line between idiocy and genius, and Cats pukes a hairball on it and rubs its ass all over it.
Variety
Nine may not be enough lives for some of the stars to live down their involvement in this poorly conceived and executed adaptation of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s hit musical.
Little White Lies
I felt the light inside me slowly fading.
The Playlist
Once Tom Hooper's 110 minutes of Cats are over, theater is dead. And we unchosen ones are left, tragically, to continue living.
New York Times
It's amazing to see what Adult Swim can accomplish with a $100 million budget. I never knew Tom Hooper was capable of making a surrealist nightmare that would rival Jodorowsky, that could baffle David Lynch, that would prompt even the dark god Cthulhu to emit an impressed eldritch shriek of “nehehehehehe”
Vulture
To assess Cats as good or bad feels like the entirely wrong axis on which to see it. It is, with all affection, a monstrosity.
The Daily Telegraph
Glad to report that Cats is everything you’d hoped for and more: a mesmerisingly ugly fiasco that makes you feel like your brain is being eaten by a parasite. A viewing experience so stressful that it honestly brought on a migraine.
Den of Geek
One of the weirdest and most garish monstrosities to be birthed out of the Hollywood studio system in this century.
Vanity Fair
It’s an ugly stray who smells bad and should not be invited into your home, certainly. And yet it is its own kind of living creature, worthy of at least some basic compassion.
The Guardian
A purr-fectly dreadful hairball of woe. 1/5.
Indiewire
Tom Hooper’s feline musical is an absurd and exuberant mess. This visually dense adaptation of the Andrew Lloyd Webber hit is at once too crazy for this world, and not quite crazy enough.
Newsday
Fans of the stage musical may swoon, but others will be severely allergic.
The Wrap
Andrew Lloyd Webber’s feline fantasy musical becomes a garish hairball. It’s hard to “ruin” Webber’s already strange musical, but Tom Hooper’s wrongheaded attempt certainly tries. Tom Hooper’s jarring fever dream of a spectacle is like something that escaped from Dr. Moreau’s creature laboratory instead of a poet’s and a composer’s feline (uni)verse, an un-catty valley hybrid of physical and digital that unsettles and crashes way more often than it enchants.
Bleeding Cool
Cats is a strange beast to begin with, but the combination of strange CGI makes the translation from stage to screen even worse.
Slant
This adaptation gets straight to the heart of the material, which is basically two hours of stray cats introducing themselves.
Rendy Reviews
On a scale of one to Zemeckis, Hooper's Cats boldly goes beyond the uncanny valley and creates a tier of its own.
Screen Junkies
A spectacular disaster...This movie feels like a prank but I don't know on whom.
The Jam Report
The most inexplicably bizarre film of the year, it's jawdropping for all the wrong reasons.
RTE Ireland
First off, full disclosure - I am not a cat person. Second off - after watching this frankly mortifying film adaptation of Andrew Lloyd Webber's Cats, I'm not altogether sure I am a movie person anymore either.
18% on Rotten Tomatoes
I actually want to see this still!
Ngl I kind of do but I know 10 minutes in I'd regret it and want to walk out It's one of those things that the more bad things I hear about it, the more curious I am to see just how bad it is.
Seeing this tonight and I'm so so excited idec!!! This is gonna be iconic 😍
I really want to see this, it looks beautiful and artistic based from the trailer and it has a lot of big names.
It wasn't actually that bad! Definitely not the degree of hyperbolic slating it has...
It just looks terrifying, how can a movie possibly be good when it looks that bad? I'm not surprised at the reviews at all, I am interested to see if it's a box office bomb or if it pulls a Greatest Showman and is popular with audiences with not critics, although ofc. that didn't get anywhere near the amount of hate this is getting.
Oh. My. God.
It’s an okay movie... it 100% doesn’t deserve the destroying reviews it’s received.
Gotta say though, Taylor is the highlight.. followed by Hudson and Derulo
It's not something that really appeals to me tbh!
I have honestly never been so speechless after a film in my life. I was traumatised, it was unintentionally hilarious, the design omg. And I kinda of really liked it cos of how MESSY and bad it was. I was one of the 4 people on earth who actually loved the initial trailer, then the 2nd trailer impressed me less and the reviews were something else. And even tho the reviews are a bit hyperbolic in their hatred, this movie really is one of a kind and so messy. I've never had to hold in laughter so much in a film before. The best comedy, the best horror, the best experience of the year. This needs to be witnessed on a big screen.
Okay so all my initial thoughts: there may be some spoilers below, just warning ya, ur choice if u wanna read on x
- The first and last shot are fugly af
- The design of the cats is absolutely horrid whilst watching it throughout the film. The tails are the worst part Jesus wept. Especially in the big dance sequences, they are SO distracting and offputting, esp in some of the ways they are used. The human hands are dreadful, the faces sometimes are off-putting (I remember one close-up to Judi Dench's cat in Memory which is horrifying), the ones you can't tell if its fur or coat I can't.
- Idris Elba's green eyes, I screamed
- the music is fine on the whole, not too many standout songs but most are nice
- completely plotless, the 'plot' that there is makes no sense and is so dull
- Talking about dull, Victoria is a nice lead but she literally does nothing of any noteworthy sense the entire film
- Ray Winstone is worst in cast. Whoever played Skimbleskanks, Rebel Wilson, James Cordon, Ian McKellen and Jennifer Hudson are probs my standouts for next worst in cast
- The entire Rebel Wilson scene is a strong contender for the worst and most unintentionally hilarious part of the film. I am f***ing traumatised by the human mice and human cockroaches. The cats were bad enough but THAT was something else. The most scary part of the film, I can't believe this is a U fml The whole scene was a mess.
- James Cordon's character & acting was horrible. Tf he was in it less than I expected
- Jason Derulo was fine, unimpactful tbh
- Victoria's scene in that random house, why? also the cutlery, no thanks
- Macavity was such a bad villain, also the disappearances of each Cat, no no no. And Macavity's last scene was so bad
- Ray Winstone's character and performance Jesus wept, that was something else, I couldn't stop laughing.
- Acc any scene on the boat is up there with the worst in the film the fight scene omg.
- I f***ing adore Memory and Beautiful Ghosts, we don't need to hear them a combined 7 times in one movie
- Talking of Memory, welp that was massacred. The first performance of Memory in the film rivals Rebel's for the worst scene in the movie. WHY DO WE NEED TO SEE THE SNOT SO CLEARLY DRIPPING DOWN JENNIFER HUDSON"S FACE THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE SONG!!!! I could barely even concentrate on her performance, my eyes were just stuck on that. WHY?!! And Jennifer was at a 15 in this scene, it was too much. Also the music was so f***ing loud over the vocals, you can tell this was completed like two days ago. The 3rd (main) performance is better on the whole but still, TOO MUCH SNOT thank you.
- Ian McKellen licking the water from the cat bowl is the most disturbing thing I've seen since Cupcakke's licking the dog bowl in the deepthroat music video
- on the whole the movie is never really that boring, there's usually a good laugh every 5 mins or so. The 'start of the 2nd act' is the one bit it drags a bit with Gus + Skimbleskanks songs. That Skimbleskank scene is a tragedy, and not in a funny way unfortunately this time. The set design & choice is ugly af for that scene and why is he wearing f***ing bright red trousers & TAP DANCING IN SHOES AS A CAT.
- And that reminds me, why did some of them have shoes on and the other cats have normal feet, christ this was disturbing
- Anyway, and not being biased, this part of boredom finally led to Taylor Swift's appearance after 75 hours, who was by far the best in the cast. The song was really good, and despite having to deal with some horrifying visuals (the catnip going on the other cats throughout the song was tragically done), she performs the f*** out of the song. I also stan her quite literally, three words of dialogue. It's a shame she disappears and her character is in the broadway play more supposedly, it would've been fun to see more than just this cameo appearance! Honestly Beautiful Ghosts in the credits is longer than her entire appearance in the film. I'm not surprised she's got quite a few standout notices from critics despite being in it by far the least of all the celeb names
- Any scene of all the cats together, were usually freaky af when dancing
- the milk bar...
- the cgi was horrible
- I wish we saw the dog in that house scene, just to see what they would've done with that cgi
- the 'cat got your tongue'/jokes of the same mould, no.
- the whole speech of each cats having 3 names leading to nothing
- Just when you think it's finally over Judi Dench breaking the 4th wall fleabag style for the 'cats is not a dog' speech had me HOWLING. WHO thought that was a good technique here? why?
I have so so many more questions. And thoughts, but I'm too tired ftm x
And I still kinda love this mess cos honestly it was a f***ing great time.
I'm desperate to see this again with a couple of drinks down me.
Omg I low key really want to see it after that review Sam! I'm gonna convince my boyfriend to go with me and have a few drinks in me prior to watching it sounds like the best way to watch it
ah well at least thecast know theyre all getting a huge turkey for xmas...
I was very disappointed...I was looking forward to it being so bad that it was funny, but it was just boring and left me struggling to stay awake. The songs aside from "Memory" aren't up to much at all.
Think I'll wait for it to come on TV. 
I just saw it and I really wasn’t as bad as people and reviews are making it out to be. It wasn’t groundbreaking or anything but it was still a pleasant and enjoyable watch . Jennifer Hudson really shone for me imo .
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