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RobBob
post Jul 19 2015, 10:42 PM
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I'm in a vewy bad mood, Bwadley.
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~ inspired by the block heads of the world ~

This sparked a whole conversation of Skype the other day, that just about anyone in life has something about themselves that they're pretty insecure about. I explained that my body was a huge insecurity, hence why whenever I do "sexual things" with a guy, I have a real thing about wanting the light to be off because... I just know I'm uncomfortable with my own body, quite simply.

We all deal with things in different ways, what sort of things are you insecure about? Do you let them affect you deeply or are you able to brush them off as you're quite self assured? They're a difficult thing to deal with, I find.
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TheGrinch
post Jul 19 2015, 10:50 PM
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Oh rob, you shouldn't be insecure in the slightest about your body.

I'm sure you will grow out of it, I've always commented as a person how pleasing it has been for me to see a friend progress so much as a person. You're only 19? and you're rather fab for your age. I know you've had a lot of confidence issues in the past but look at you now from the person you were. You couldn't send a picture of yourself anywhere and now you're basically Lincoln's biggest whore. I'm proud Ahmed.

I've got a couple of insecurities regarding myself but once you have enough confidence in yourself it's easy to move on. I've had a stutter since the age of 12 and I've never let it affect me once as I've got enough confidence in myself to stand and do two fifteen minutes presentations a week at University.

I feel like my biggest insecurity is worrying too much about the future, wondering if you're going to settle down and who with and when. The last couple of relationships I've had have ended rather horrendously.

I also have a shit nose and a shit smile.

Apart from that I'm flawless.
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M.
post Jul 19 2015, 11:04 PM
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...which occasionally makes me avoid certain social situations despite my deep-seated need for a connection with people (thank god for the Internet tbh - although I do have some friends in real life, thank goodness). Not so much that I'm super worried about others judging me for it, but just the feeling it can give me can be pretty annoying.

Also I wish I looked a little more masculine, 'stronger' face and stuff. I wouldn't call it a particuarly big insecurity though.
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Martyn
post Jul 19 2015, 11:06 PM
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My nose
The size of my forehead
My hair is trying to escape my head
my teeth
my smile.
Scars from my scoliosis operation
too skinny, look like I have stick arms.

That is literally off the top of my head.
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ʟɪɴᴅs.
post Jul 19 2015, 11:07 PM
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I have way too many, mostly with the way I look but that's also kinda affected how I am around people, I am so awkward and introverted around almost everyone, I really try not to be because it makes everything 100x more difficult, meeting new people, when I had job interviews, doing presentations, even with people I'm friends with, especially when I'm part of a large group it just makes me feel so out of place. I worry that people just think I don't want to talk to them or I'm being rude, hopefully that's something that will get better over time though, I mean it has done a little since I left school I think laugh.gif
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Slade
post Jul 19 2015, 11:12 PM
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My biggest insecurity is the way that I look, pretty much my entire face but particularly my ears (although I plan on having them pinned back when adulthood arrives). Hence why I like to cake myself in make-up a lot of the time! Aside from that, it really bothers me how awkward I can be in social situations, especially in large groups. Desperately hoping that confidence and self belief will come with age as the latter can be awfully low at times! Although I s'pose that has already happened so far as I was even worse a few years back, so here's hoping for more of a positive outlook on things in the future.
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LexC
post Jul 19 2015, 11:13 PM
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Oh where do I f*****g start.

I'd say my biggest ones are thinking I have the physical appearance of some kind of hideous ogre, thinking my friends consider me a 'B-List friend' and thinking I have absolutely no discernible talent at anything.

So yeah, I realise this post is not very constructive.

Puppies!
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Math ☂
post Jul 19 2015, 11:14 PM
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I used to be REALLY insecure about my appearance but I've found that just blocking it out and trying to have a sense of humor about it helps me get past that. I guess my main insecurity nowadays is the fact that nobody really hangs out with me / talks to me other then my immediate family, and now my mom has all these friends out of nowhere and I really don't know where I'll find anybody sad.gif (Aside from an ATRLer who lives 10 minutes away from me but he's 23 soooo). Yeah </3
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Cucumberella
post Jul 19 2015, 11:17 PM
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oh i'm insecure about every fibre of my being. i was heavily bullied when i was younger so it's just drummed into my head rly.
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M.
post Jul 19 2015, 11:26 PM
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QUOTE(Lindsey ♌ @ Jul 20 2015, 12:07 AM) *
I have way too many, mostly with the way I look but that's also kinda affected how I am around people, I am so awkward and introverted around almost everyone, I really try not to be because it makes everything 100x more difficult, meeting new people, when I had job interviews, doing presentations, even with people I'm friends with, especially when I'm part of a large group it just makes me feel so out of place. I worry that people just think I don't want to talk to them or I'm being rude, hopefully that's something that will get better over time though, I mean it has done a little since I left school I think laugh.gif


I never would've guessed ohmy.gif I've found that this is an extremely common issue though. As I said here before, I'm in a similar boat. It sounds like a cliché, but I think it does get better with time. You mentioned it improving a little since you left school - I feel the same way. I feel like school can be so limiting in a way, if that makes sense, it's often only after people leave school that they really come out of their shells and become more comfortable in themselves etc. I mean I always hear people who are around forty or so say things like "I am so much more comfortable and at peace with myself now and I would never have guessed when I was 18 or whatever that I would turn into this person". I think as you get older you just start to care less about what people think.

Also I would like to add about myself that sometimes I wonder if I'll ever find anyone truly right for me. I'm making little steps towards trying to achieve this, but I feel like my social awkwardness could make it very difficult for me to get past the first stages of meeting a partner - like the dates, them asking loads of questions about me etc. Although I do love the idea of being with a partner that I can talk to about anything and everything, about my childhood, my emotions, everything. And have them do the same. I just don't know if I'll ever be able to find that. I'm currently trying to find people online but I have this anxiety about meeting someone in real life that I only know online. I've never done it.
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HausAlone
post Jul 19 2015, 11:31 PM
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I'm now really insecure about my height sad.gif I always need to know the height of people before we meet because i'd just always think that the other people are looking down on me (literally). I am becoming less insecure about my sexuality thanks to guys on here mostly and my gay friends but i still have it badly around family and work occasionally.

Also my nose is disgusting.
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Sceryl_Streep
post Jul 19 2015, 11:32 PM
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Mine is mostly re. friends not actually valuing me enough, or at least not being obvious enough about it. It's obviously just my being too needy, but I had 2 different sets of friends at school totally disown/shun/ignore/stop talking to me entirely at various points and yeah, that tends to f*** one up a bit. That usually ends really badly too, because I try and illicit a response from them too often in respect of that, but it usually just ends badly with my getting pissed off at them for stuff they don't even KNOW ABOUT. Oops.
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RobBob
post Jul 19 2015, 11:33 PM
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I'm in a vewy bad mood, Bwadley.
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And the fact you're stuck up, Bal, obviously.
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HausAlone
post Jul 19 2015, 11:36 PM
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! that too obviously drama.gif also family fortune rounds i create not becoming hits sad.gif
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Yuki On Ice~
post Jul 19 2015, 11:37 PM
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I'm always insecure about my nose, pictures of me have to be head-on or (to me at least) it looks awful and embarrassing.

On more general psychological matters, I'm always a little insecure about whether I've annoyed someone somehow, I go out of my way to make sure this is never the case. And whether I'm friends with someone or not, I'm very bad at evaluating my relationship with others and therefore keeping it that way. And always insecure about how I come across in social situations and getting self-conscious when I realise I haven't said a word in a group for ages. I'm just a BALL of these when I get social.
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Riser
post Jul 20 2015, 02:09 PM
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I've always been insecure with my body, which is something I've just recently been willing to open up about. The worst of it was running cross-country in high school, especially during practice when I was the only guy who wouldn't run with his shirt off. It would have helped me to talk about it a long time ago, but I kept it entirely to myself because I was ashamed for being so insecure, thinking that guys don't deal with it and no one would relate if I ever mentioned it. That's definitely not true, as I've come to find out! It's silly because I know most people would think I'm fairly attractive, and I've finally come to accept that I look pretty good. I still get uncomfortable in certain situations but it's a huge relief to be worrying about that a lot less now.
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M.
post Jul 20 2015, 02:17 PM
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OMG when I was a lot younger, I was super insecure about my glasses (not so much anymore - although I would prefer to have perfect vision of course). I used to take them off and hide them when near people who didn't know I had them and I used to not wear them in school for a while and I literally just couldn't see the board for ages laugh.gif Once when I was on a bus with my mum and some of my classmates came on the bus, I took my glasses off and lied to my mum that my eyes were hurting/tired and that's why I took them off. God I was such a paranoid little f*** tbh drama.gif
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*Tim
post Jul 20 2015, 02:24 PM
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Jesus take the wheel, where do I begin. There's quite a few things I am very insecure about and it's mainly in my face area
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Liаm
post Jul 20 2015, 02:29 PM
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Pretty much everything for me too laugh.gif Definitely the way I look as a big one, especially my body, people are like "oh it's puppy fat" but it's really not and I know that can be sorted but it's really not that easy. I won't even meet guys from Grindr for example even if I really like them because I'm afraid they'll take one look at me that isn't the one profile picture I don't hate and use for everything and be put off...

Things kind of got better but I've had a few setbacks recently and it's kind of all gone downhill again and I don't like anything about myself a whole lot. I'm hoping that will improve when my environment improves and I'm off to uni which will keep me busy and I'll always have people around, rather than just being on my own in my room a lot and having wayyyyy too much time to dwell on what I've done wrong, what I want to better about myself etc.etc.

When I've constantly been told and even, before, bullied I'm not good enough it's hard to think otherwise. One or two people saying "no actually you're cute/great/amazing/funny" does lift me up but it can't undo those who've cut so deep by saying or implying otherwise.
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M.
post Jul 20 2015, 02:44 PM
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I was bullied as a kid too but I think it was mostly because I just had such a fiery temper and people always wanted to make me super duper angry laugh.gif
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