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> Buzzjack, my conscious uncoupling with you
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TheGrinch
post Oct 26 2015, 06:48 PM
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I'd like to post this here because I'd rather get everything out in the open sooner rather than later. I'm at the stage now where I've fallen out of love with Buzzjack and I find myself having to come and post here for the sake of it and truth be told, I have too many things going on my life which I can / can't control.

I've made a lot of incredible friends from the website and there's some members that I'll stay in touch with but I'm just not interested in Buzzjack and haven't really been interested in the website for the last 6 months. I've also made a couple of enemies and it's becoming something rather unhealthy for me and it's something that's slowly starting to affect my real life.

I've found myself either trying to amuse myself, whether that be at the misfortune of others (BJSC) and I'm truly sorry about that because I never put the feelings of others above the consideration of others.

I'm 22 years old and I'm not the flawless, egotistical person that I make out to be. Like everybody I have feelings and sometimes my biggest flaw is that I only put into consideration my own feelings or those of people that I consider to be close with me. I'm sure 90% of the website are aware of the mess that was BJSC and It's something that I try to brush off, not because I don't consider it serious or disappointing it's just something I dislike talking about because in life there's nothing worse than facing up to your f*** ups. There's always two sides to every story and I was happy enough to sit back and take the blame for all the shit because I care about other members but Joe did not only help fix the Finals he also helped fix the semi finals, he's not as innocent as he makes you out to be and I can't sit back and let him attack me once again whilst wearing a white hat he has no right to be wearing.

While on the topic, I'm aware some sort of witch hunt has been ongoing against me with certain members conspiring and looking through old messages to take one member down, I'm lucky I'm strong enough to deal with members trying to take one down but it's laughable and that gets me to my next point. The Lounge. I wanted to make Joe into a poster who was loved by the majority off Buzzjack and make him into something big because I never admired anybody as much as I admired him in The Saturdays forum. In Bjko 2015 I tried to get as many members to support him as possible and it's something I immensely regret as I took a lot of credit for him getting big marks off members which ultimately cost April a place in the next round (You know how much I love and adore you and I would have wanted you to qualify so it wasn't actually biased). Everybody is guilty during popularity contests which is the saddest thing.

I never changed any results, I simply attempted to support somebody I considered as a friend. Once again I made a decision through naivete and acted outside of what was proper, but once again it was with the best of intentions and I'm hurt by the vilification and sense that my every fault is being sought out and exposed. I know a lot of people have questioned everything since BJSC and I can assure you that other than supporting "victim" Joe (who I also defended for asking people to vote for him in BJKO and took the blame for the whole Paul situation) but seeing comments such as "I'll be lounge mod once Lee is axed" (from Joe) has slowly showed me that sometimes you can be so invested in a website that it clouds your judgement and makes you do silly things and act in a way you normally wouldn't. In cases like that you need to take a step back because it affects you as a person. I'm slowly being drained by the entire process and I don't have much time for the childish process of enjoying the fall of others.

I'd always like to say that I believe I'm a good person and have good intentions because I care about 90% of this website and I'm proud of the community I have helped to build and I love to have seen so many members benefit from things such as plug (Look at lindsey & Lotti.. what a perfect duo). I've created so many fond memories and have become friends at least three members who I will be friends in real life with (Y'all know who you are).

I'm not a perfect human, I'm far from it. I'm at times a control freak and I think at times this website has made me into somebody that I'm not and I can say that the Lee Wallace IRL is a bigger mess. Right now I need to sort things out with my life and sort my priorities out, I know a lot of y'all will continue to judge me but I know a lot of you have been there for me and it's something I couldn't be more thankful about but I think I need to put my sanity and my happiness first and focus fully on myself. This is something I've thought about for the last three months, Buzzjack isn't really good for me right now... I just love the people way to much. I need to put University first, my life first and the people who matter first.

This is a big deal for me because I can't put into words how much I care for Ryan, Froot, John, Bre, Jade, Jonjo, Iz, Rooney, Tim, Liam, James, Cameron, Lindsey, Math, Bal, Harry, Jay (*), hell as much as I want to murder him half of the time it's such a privledge to have witnessed posters like Joseph become so essenstial to the forum. I've been here for 5 years and as I said it's time that I put my life first and focused on me and not focused on feeling down / pressured into posting on a website that I'm drifting away from. It's been a pleasure working with Chris, David etc in the lounge but I know the lounge will be in safe hands with Bre and Bal (Hire Jade asap) and it's been a pleasure working with them over the last year. It's been an emotional roller coaster of a time for me but right now my main priority is University and continue building a future for myself.





x
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Klampus
post Oct 26 2015, 06:58 PM
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wtf are perfect places
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sad.gif
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ʟɪɴᴅsʟᴇɪɢʜ.
post Oct 26 2015, 07:04 PM
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Heda
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Aw Lee cry.gif I will miss seeing you around the forum so much, It's been such a pleasure being able to befriend you over the past year, BuzzJack really isn't going to be the same without you, you're such a presence on this site. I hope things get better for you in every aspect of your life and I'll always be here for you heart.gif

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MerryFlynnmas
post Oct 26 2015, 07:12 PM
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Sit Down. Be Humble.
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No Lee sad.gif

Its been amazing getting to know you other the last year, Buzzjack isnt going to be same without you hun, please stay in touch cry.gif
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*Tim
post Oct 26 2015, 07:14 PM
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Jemma Lucy of t Seet
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sad.gif

No Lee, this honestly breaks my heart sad.gif
I cannot stand the thought of a buzzjack without you


This post has been edited by *The Beast: Oct 26 2015, 07:15 PM
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Slade
post Oct 26 2015, 07:16 PM
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Mrs Brayden Smith <333
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Wow that's a lot to take in. I honestly thought BJSC was an isolated case so it's disappointing to hear of further backstage shenanigans that are coming to light.

Aside from that I will miss your presence a lot around here Lee, without you introducing plug.dj I never would have the relationship with the site that I do now. It's a huge shame for things to be this way but putting Uni first does sound sensible if that is what's right for you. Thanks for being a wonderful friend to me and for the kind words, we won't lose contact anyway I'm sure.
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JosephCarey
post Oct 26 2015, 07:20 PM
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dreadlocked hair don't care
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I agree that it's disappointing to hear that it's not an isolated case. Lee, you know that I think highly of you and it will be a shame if you're not around, but I absolutely can't condone the fixing of contests (or the dragging down of Joe here) and some of the sympathy in this thread seems to be missing the point...

But this aside, you're a pleasure to talk to and I really don't want us to lose contact!
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Christmas Cherry...
post Oct 26 2015, 07:20 PM
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feminist icon
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Lee sad.gif Ik we've only known each other for a couple of months but you're great, and you along with others made me feel so welcome to this site wub.gif

I will miss you on BJ, for starters only a limited number of people appreciate sassy PLL gifs!! sad.gif
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t=SpunderfulXmas
post Oct 26 2015, 07:20 PM
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Hang in when the world counts you out and you’re gonna be fine
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Lee, you've done so much for the forum since I've been around. You've really put a lot of effort into Buzzrate, BJSC (twice, in a row!), not to mention other forums you moderate such as The Saturdays in only a year I've been a member for. You're one of the funniest and entertaining posters on here and to see you go I feel that it wouldn't be the same Buzzjack. Bringing things like plug.dj into our lives has been really fun and we've all had some great moments on there. Don't let haters and past mistakes you've made bring you down; we've all made them in the past so don't dissapear from our lives forever please cry.gif
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Ryan.
post Oct 26 2015, 07:23 PM
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I'm on my phone so I can't post everything I wish to at the moment without taking hours using this small keyboard, but I've got to know you Lee so so well over the last few weeks and while it's a shame this has happened again, I do totally believe your reasonings there as knowing you personally showed me that there isn't a purposely malicious bone in your body and issues like these are just silly naive mistakes.

I really hope you don't leave us completely but I know we'll stay in touch whatever happens!
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5 Silas Frøkner
post Oct 26 2015, 07:24 PM
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Surfing in paradise
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You should work in PR after you graduate mate. You're totally perfect for a career in that field.
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JSG
post Oct 26 2015, 07:26 PM
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'Run Away With Me'
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Honestly on more upset to see that you're leaving that I actually thought I would be haha. Best of luck to you but please do come back soon xx
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Sceryl_Streep
post Oct 26 2015, 07:27 PM
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Miss Rodham, if you're nasty
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This is very sad, Lee has made mistakes but the general bandwagon of hate by otherwise sensible, decent people has disheartened me.
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JosephCarey
post Oct 26 2015, 07:31 PM
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The way some have reacted to this is actually slightly worrying considering there's basically a character assassination of Joe (one of the nicest people EVER) in there...
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KWEEN_DEE
post Oct 26 2015, 07:33 PM
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Lee sad.gif
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JSG
post Oct 26 2015, 07:33 PM
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'Run Away With Me'
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Well tbh it doesn't matter what either of them have done. I don't condone anything that's been done over the last few months like this, but this thread is about Lee leaving and all I See are a few people saying there sad to see Lee go, myself included.
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Candlelit Snow
post Oct 26 2015, 07:34 PM
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Life is so much queefier than we allow ourselves to think x
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Wait, so ... you're leavin???

Take a step back but don't leave!! So you made a couple mistakes, so does everyone.
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Andrew.
post Oct 26 2015, 07:34 PM
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It's sad to see an important and valuable contributor to the lounge go but I felt your whole post was a rather horrible swipe at Joe, trying to make him feel guilty.
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HausAlone
post Oct 26 2015, 07:36 PM
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Henrietta R Hippo
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Lee i am not sure what you mean by uncoupling - you are still a big part of this place. Yes you may have taken advantage of your moderator positions so maybe they should no longer be had, but apart from some select messages and actions to one member on here, you're still valued as a person.

QUOTE(Halloqween @ Oct 26 2015, 07:27 PM) *
This is very sad, Lee has made mistakes but the general bandwagon of hate by otherwise sensible, decent people has disheartened me.

I'm slightly confused by this. There has been no bandwagon of hate.. Lee is loved on here by many including the Lounge moderators and members of management!? Would you rather this didn't come out to protect Lee or as Global Mod, would you rather we got fair results and everyone knew where they stood with what has happened.

Lee's post is extremely disheartening to read, and it's good he has opened up like this if that is what will help him. None of this is part of a bandwagon or anything. Lee has made mistakes as you have said, and they are now out in the open - the fact he learnt that he was going to be exposed in advance of it happening (by yourself) has led to this thread coming before we got to post our own revelations, and it is a raw response so i am glad he has done it in ways.
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Cremey
post Oct 26 2015, 07:37 PM
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white girl wasted on brown liquor
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If everyone took this site less seriously it would be a far better place.
Fixing results in an online competition? Who cares? Some of you are acting like he's killed someone! Talking about 'isolated cases'..? Ha.
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