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> Denial, Another philosophical thread
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awardinary
post Aug 18 2017, 08:07 AM
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Hey guys, It's time for another philosophical thread by me, and the subject I've chosen to talk about this month is Denial.



Why denial? huh.gif

I think it's safe to assume that so many of us live in constant oblivion, meaning we choose to only focus on the here and now and ignore the other pressing matters that need our attention. This is procrastination and it's really just another form of denial, thinking that it's ok to leave it until later or that the matter isn't of high importance.

For example, have you ever sat back thinking that your life is good and cosy when in fact it's not and you're living a lie? "Faking it until you make it" as they say?

Denial can also manifest itself by convincing ourselves that everything is ok when in fact it is not. In my own case, I'm in heavy debt, and I have been for quite some time now, but despite making minor efforts to repay what I owe, I try to forget about the money I owe back and continue to live my life financially carefree. What I'm basically doing is lying to myself, pretending that everything is ok but in fact it's a lot more serious than I want to think.

A final form of denial I want to mention is when you've offended someone unknowingly, and then they may hold a grudge but you are in denial about your actions and don't think it had anything to do with you when in fact it did. It's happened to me before and I've not realised that my actions have hurt another person as badly as they did and I denied that I had anything to do with it. sad.gif

This subject may or may not get much discussion, but I just thought I'd put it out there and see! laugh.gif
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t=SpunderfulXmas
post Aug 18 2017, 08:36 AM
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I know I had to choose the route of fake happiness a couple of months ago, and again it didn't help at all.
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Petelehem
post Aug 18 2017, 11:49 AM
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I have to say I haven't really felt that yet in my life. Obviously I procrastinate, but usually I get it done, even if it's months after I first thought of it. Obviously I've no idea what the future will hold, it'll probably include some of this but I'd like to think I could keep positive though it.
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JingleBellJupes
post Aug 18 2017, 01:08 PM
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You have to start by being honest with yourself, and trusting yourself. Also, learning how you work. For example, myself, I am terrible with authority, doing what I'm told, following rules. But better if I can rationlize to myself - or have someone sensible or trustworthy rationalize to me - reasons to do or not to do something. Or look realistically at a short term loss for a longterm gain, tricking yourself, if you can.

Other people prefer being told what to do and given direction to just follow down a path, structure. Easy to remember instructions.

Denial though. That doesn't help anyone in the long run, unless it's a white lie like helping you deal with something else bigger like grief or lack of confidence or something. That's a case in which I'd say it's a lesser of two evils.

Apologies for coming in with ideas instead of a confession. I'm lucky enough in some ways to have already come out - mostly - the other end of the tunnel on these kinds of things and to have a bit more of an idea of how to get a handle on them.

EDIT: In terms of interpersonal relationships, I think that's a better place - maybe even THE key place - to cut and run if it's not working, instead of deluding yourself that someone is someone they're not.


This post has been edited by StillJupiter: Aug 18 2017, 01:09 PM
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HowToPronounceMa...
post Aug 18 2017, 01:14 PM
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awardinary, I love some of your threads in this vein! :clap: Because of how I get a kick out of theoretical conversation of course, heh..

I'm still learning how to not let things slide under the carpet for too long. Eventually things will boil over and that's not pretty. You'll end up having too many things to process through at once. I'm learning that I have to ask myself "how do I feel about this situation?" If the answer is negative, then it may be time to do something about it. I think I'm slower than most people at this.

(I said more but I hate making posts too long x)
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Winter Wombatlan...
post Aug 18 2017, 01:24 PM
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I do tend to always look on the bright side, so can be guilty of falling into these, though I certainly don't think my life is rosy as it is, I think the most important thing is that you realise this and are taking steps to change it and head towards a place that feels happier. I always try and keep myself busy with things that actually make me happy and are trying to fix what part of yourself is in denial, and it's a good coping mechanism a lot of the time!
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