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Jack
post May 20 2018, 05:39 PM
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I'm going to try not to make this a self indulgent post so apologies if it comes across that way.

My boyfriend who I live with and is also my best friend is going to live in Madrid / Paris for a year come the end of August and it has been making me feel so anxious and distressed. To go from spending time with someone all the time to nearly nothing is stressing me out - I know that comes across as needy but I spend the majority of my time with him and he is always there when I'm feeling low or just want to hang with someone. He's going as part of his uni course and I am very supportive and I know he has to go which I completely get but, selfishly, I am upset by it.

Anyway, on the topic of this - can long distance work and has anyone been in a position where they have been in a long distance relationship before, and if so, how have you made it work if it has?
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Tombo
post May 20 2018, 05:49 PM
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What is your current situation? Can you go out with him?
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5 Silas Frøkner
post May 20 2018, 06:02 PM
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Have you spoken to him about it? I’d put a fiver on him going through the same feelings as you are. It’s not selfish at all to miss someone. You’re not asking him to stay, he has your full support so there’s nothing selfish at all about your thoughts.

Ryanair/Eastjet/Iberia Express/Veuling et al will be your best mate! laugh.gif

My best mates partner lives in Canada and they’re happy! They take turns visiting each other. My old flat mate from Denmark was dating an American for ages and they were split by the Atlantic for like 3 years and are now in the states together very happy. Good luck Jack!
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Emily Haines
post May 20 2018, 06:12 PM
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Me and my husband lived 250 miles away from each other when we were going out & saw each other for a long weekend every 4-6 weeks. It's hard, but talking on the phone really helps. We used to just lie in bed talking into the early hours, and it helped me feel less alone.

I learnt not to take our time together for granted and when we were together, it just felt sweeter.

However, that was the default for our relationship, so I didn't really know any different until I moved up to live with him.
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Jade
post May 23 2018, 06:19 PM
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Me and Bray are not quite living in separate countries or anything but we have been in a long distance arrangement for almost two and a half years now! We see each other about every three weeks for a couple of days. I do often envy my brother who gets to see his girlfriend about five times a week but it can definitely work. You just need to be strong with communication when you're not together, platforms like Skype and WhatsApp are a godsend for us talking during the many weeks that we don't spend together. Then things like Snapchat and actual Skype calls are great when you want a bit more than just text-based conversation.

I think it can totally work if you love the other person and have the mind-set that it won't be long distance forever. It's not ideal at all and can be tough (like when all you need is a hug from them but it just can't happen) but it's doable and you get used to it in time. Also on the bright side, you really cherish the time you spend together with it not being all that frequent. Best of luck Jack <3 hope you guys can make it through the distance just fine!
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Jack
post Jun 1 2018, 06:34 PM
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I hadn't read this until now but that's actually so reassuring and I needed this today laugh.gif Just to hear that other people are going through / have been through similar experiences is so reassuring.
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