Well this is a rank I did for another forum last Christmas.

 

I've sadly lost the list of people who contributed to it. I thanked them at the time and very few of them use this forum now.

 

Everyone put the 19 tracks in order - every #1 got 19 points, every #19 got 1 point - and scores were totted.

 

I did a little commentary for each song and it made me laugh writing it. Thought I'd share it with you.

 

If people want to read the reviews and give scores out of ten (as they did after John's review of her debut) that would be great.

 

If not I shall laugh at my own jokes because I'm like that. I may then spend the evening looking at myself in the mirror and making 'mmm' noises.

 

 

19. Sprung [53]

 

First place: Never

Last place: Four times

 

The song: It's a shame this came last as it's not that bad. The lyrics are a bit naff ('head' rhymes with 'bed', 'upside down' rhymes with 'round and round') but the song is unusual and does not really sound like a standard Mariah song. She begins all her lines shouting then goes all whispery which I like as well.

 

Carey canon: It's a bonus track for the UK which I think is better than some of the songs that made the normal version. Bonus tracks for Europe are nothing new. 'Music Box' and 'Merry Christmas' both had an extra track; and 'Charmbracelet' and 'Rainbow' were both re-released after Mariah had hit collaborations to tack on the end.

 

18. To The Floor [71]

 

First place: Never

Last place: Twice

 

The song: It's not brilliant but it's enjoyably slinky urban music. Mariah and Nelly interrupt each other during the verses which works very well. In the lyrics, Mariah claims not to be easy. Good for her!

 

Carey canon: Mariah's first song with Nelly and the second Neptunes song on 'Mimi'. There is a song called 'Lullaby' on her 'Charmbracelet' album that sounds very Neptunes, for those who like this song, but I'm not sure whether they produced it or whether it's just a knock-off.

 

17. I Wish You Knew [71]

 

First place: Never

Last place: Once [Which is why it's a place above 'To The Floor' when they both got 71 points]

 

The song: I hated this song for ages because it has the fake audience on. I've been listening to it recently and I have now decided it is very brilliant. A solid soul ballad in the same vein as 'Circles'. She goes a bit mental at the end, like she does on the many of the ballads on this album, which sounds great.

It just has naff fake screaming on it. What was she thinking?

 

Carey canon: This is the eighth Mariah song to have people screaming over it. The other seven come from her 'Unplugged' album. And there are real people screaming over them and she's actually singing live so that's much better.

 

16. Makin' It Last [72 points]

 

First place: Never

Last place: Three times

 

The song: This is clearly rubbish. Sounds like a 'Charmbracelet' B-side - almost as bad as 'Secret Love'. Boo hiss Mariah. Still it shows, by contrast, just how amazing most of 'Mimi' is. I have nothing good to say about this song and I would rather it was not on the re-release and I could listen to 18 brilliant songs and not go near my skip button.

 

Carey canon: 'So Lonely' is another bonus track on the re-released 'Emancipation of Mimi'. That song is amazing. This one is a bit $h!t. My favourite Mimi bonus track ever is 'God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen', fact fans.

 

15. Joy Ride [78 points]

 

First place: Never

Last place: Once

 

The song: It's very pretty. Mariah calls this the 'baby-making' song on the album. I'm not sure people would want to have sex to this; I feel uncomfortable even having sex with myself to this song when she starts shrieking at the end. It's not one of the big songs on the album but it's a great change of pace and, apart from the dog whistle, it's quite understated as well.

The question is....does Mariah know a joy ride is something drunk scals do and not something romantic?

 

Carey canon: Mariah's best 'baby-making' song is 'Melt Away'. Scratch that, Mariah's best song is 'Melt Away'. It's on 'Daydream' and it actually sounds like falling in love.

 

There's a big jump in points between this and the next song. I guess we've all deemed these the 5 stinkers on the album. The thing is - 4 of the songs are really good and would have been highlights on albums by the younger divas.

 

Oh yes I remember this.

Oh yes I remember this.

I'm glad.

 

Your positive comments made me keep writing the reviews. I'd have given up at about #16 otherwise.

14. Say Something [104 points]

First place: Never

Last place: Never [it came eight a couple of times - that's it]

 

The song: I downloaded this over a year ago (more on that later) and I've always struggled to love it. It was a new Mariah song, so I was excited but something about it never quite POPPED the way the best 'Mimi' singles did. This song would have sat happily on 'Charmbracelet' but that's not really a huge compliment. Her voice does not sound great on this song - she either does that gravelly whisper or shouts.

It's Neptunes. It's Snoop Dogg. It's not really Mariah.

 

Carey canon: I'm so glad this was not the lead single. It was leaked to radio as were 'Loverboy' and 'It's Like That' but this song was not played at all. 'Loverboy' did terribly at radio but at least it made the Top 100 (it went to #60-something on airplay alone then made #2 when the single proper was released).

I do think it's better than 'It's Like That' but it would never have been a hit. It's just not catchy enough. And the 'Return of the Voice' campaign would not have worked because she's barely singing.

Mariah had previously worked with Snoop Dogg on the song 'Crybaby' from 'Rainbow'. 'Crybaby' is Mariah's greatest vocal performance ever. She's got soul on this record.

 

13. One And Only [103 points]

 

First place: Never [it came third once]

Last place: Never

 

The song: This is clearly rubbish. She does those silly sped-up vocals, she barely sings and she has a guest rapper who shows her up. And the dog whistle seems rather needless. I always skip this. Always.

 

Carey canon: 'The One' on 'Charmbracelet' has very quickly sung verses too. And that song was a bit rubbish too. Mariah Carey has another song with Twista - a sort of sequel to this song - which is yet to appear.

Mariah has worked with other rappers, including the following: ODB, Da Brat, members of Bone Thugs 'N' Harmony, The Lox, Snoop Dogg, Mystikal, Fabolous, Ja Rule, Busta Rhymes, Ludacris, Shawna, Nelly.

 

12. We Belong Together (Remix) [103 points]

 

First place: Never [it came second once]

Last place: Never

 

The song: What a brilliant remix. It sounds nothing like the original and I love the pace of second verse. The rap sections do not feel stuck on and there are some new lyrics. It's the same song yet it's not. Fantastic.

 

Carey Canon: You know why Mariah and the Lox sound so good together on this song? Because this is not their first time together. The Lox appeared on the 'Honey' remix, which is sadly very rare, and Jadakiss appeared alone on the brilliant track 'Miss You'.

This is one of many big Mariah hits to have a remix. There's an album of them for the die-hard fans. Most of these remixes (the So So Def mix of 'Honey', Desert Storm 'Heartbreaker', Bad Boy 'Fantasy') have essentially the same choruses as the originals. If you want a remix that sounds NOTHING like the original, you want 'I Still Believe (Pure Imagination)'. It's only available as a B-side. It features Da Brat and a sample from 'Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory'. It's ace.

 

11. Your Girl [104 points]

 

First place: Never [it came sixth a few times]

Last place: Never

 

The song: Oh, I do like this one. Mariah coos 'I should be your girl'. The chipmunk sample (eat that, Simon Webbe) comes in and then the most perfectly-formed song begins. It's quite a sad song - Mariah is pleading -but it's just so good that it can't help but make you smile. This song, though it was never going to be her eighteenth #1, is just wonderful. And that's what 'Mimi' is about: a good album, not just a few radio hits.

Edited August 14, 200618 yr by Tim

Top ten tomorrow. Gives you a chance to read the thing - and me a chance to read more bloody Tennyson.

Hmmm. The WBT Remix, Sprung and Your Girl deserved higher. -_-

to be honest I havnt listen to the album for ages and I mean ages :lol: I should get it out :P

Listen to it ALL Josh, barring One And Only and To The Floor. :)

Great review so far Tim, I'll post a review of this later. I find it too difficult to score songs out of 10 especially when they are by Mariah. :wub:

10. So Lonely [115 points]

First place: Never [it came third once]

Last place: Never

 

The song: It’s ridiculous how much better this is than ‘One And Only’. A fast-paced RnB hit with a chorus which is mainly Mariah making sex noises. In tune and to a melody. Excellent idea. This is cool RnB in the best sense of the word. Mariah’s obligatory wailing at the end is very understated and Mariah shows that ‘less is more’ with her vocals.

 

Carey canon: Mariah’s first orgasm! She’s middle-aged now and she’s finally found her inner skank. Good for her. Her filthiest song is probably the hit ‘Honey’, and ‘Loverboy’ is full of double entendres too, but here Mariah masters the single entendre: Ah ha ha-ha-ha-ha.

 

9. Mine Again [116 points]

First place: Never [it came seventh once]

Last place: Never

 

The song: Mariah has never been very ‘cool’. Yes, she’s worked with a series of esteemed producers and artists. Was revolutionary in being a pop artist using a rapper to cross genres. But she’s never been someone you could name-drop amongst NME readers and similarly dull groups of people. Possibly, because she makes songs like ‘Mine Again’. It’s a fine ballad and it does fit with the soul feel of ‘Mimi’, but it’s not really doing anything interesting. I call it her ‘prom ballad’ because it’s the musical equivalent of a tacky pink dress which has been stained by punch, mud and your boyfriend’s sick. I like it really but I’d never tell anyone.

 

8. Fly Like A Bird [130 points]

First place: Never [it came fourth four times]

Last place: Never

 

The song: Mariah goes all gospel and it works a treat. I find the song quite moving, and I’m not at all religious, but obviously very cynical people will be mean about it. What can you do? I love Mariah’s vocals on this song. The first chorus is soft and pretty. The second is expressive and powerful. The third has a big gospel choir. Mariah sounds brilliant on this song. Best bit is when she screams ‘I need you to come and carry me higher, Lord’. It’s not very restrained and it’s not pitch perfect, but that’s sort of the point. She does not sound perfect yet she’s never sounded better.

 

Carey canon: Mariah’s Christmas album features a fair few songs about God. ‘Jesus O What A Wonderful Child’ is evangelist gospel and there are traditional carols as well. ‘I Am Free’ is a gospel song from the Daydream album. Even if you’re a strict atheist, if you’ve ever been lonely or sad then this song is so inspiring. ‘My Saving Grace’ is religious too. It’s from ‘Charmbracelet’ and so is, understandably, a bit c**p.

 

7. Get Your Number [137 points]

First place: Once

Last place: Once

 

The song: This is my favourite song of the year and I can’t believe it’s so low. It’s got an ace 80s squelch sample. Mariah’s vocals are almost erratic as the beat. She coos and acts all coy and then brags about how she has her own naff reality TV popera group. (If a G4 means something else in America, please let me know). And Jermaine Dupri blasphemes and Mariah goes all mental.

 

Carey canon: Mariah does not sing the chorus on this song which is a (sort of) first for her. On her hit collaborations with Busta Rhymes (‘I Know What You Want’) and Jadakiss (‘U Make Me Wanna’), and also on the ‘Glitter’ album, she often has guests rap the verses and then she sings the chorus. This time, it’s the other way round. A (sort of) rapper sings the chorus and she does the verses. Mariah does not sing the first chorus on ‘When You Believe’ – that crack fiend does instead – but this is the first time when Mariah does not sing any of the choruses.

 

6. Shake It Off [139 points]

First place: Never [it came fourth twice]

Last place: Never

 

The song: Yeah, I thought this was about wanking at first. I was very disappointed to hear that ‘shake it off’ means something else. It was a big hit in America because they like mid-tempo RnB. The video for this is hilarious and really improves the song. I wonder if Mariah was paid by Calgon and Louis Vuitton for including their products in the lyrics. I’m still upset that ‘Get Your Number’ did not win. How did ‘Shake It Off’ beat it?

 

Carey canon: This was a big hit so it was obviously not a bad choice of single. But 5 songs by Jermaine Dupri were released as singles from this album. And so far none by any of the many other, arguably more sophisticated, producers on the album. The last JD/Mariah single was ‘Always Be My Baby’ ten years ago. DJ Clue and Jam&Lewis produced her UK top ten singles for the last few years.

 

Do please leave your comments: I'd love to hear what everyone thinks.

5. Circles [151 points]

First place: Twice

Last place: Never

 

The song: Another solid ‘Mimi’ track. It’s a soul number and it’s really very good. Whether you keep bumping into your music mogul ex-husband or not, I think you can easily relate to it. And it was a few people’s favourite song on the album.

 

Carey canon: There have been an awful lot of Mariah songs about the case of the ex. A fair few of them have been US #1s. ‘Someday’ is fabulously dated pop and is one of those juggernaut vocal performances. ‘My All’ is very pretty and has an ace Morales dance remix. And there’s ‘We Belong Together’ too. More on that song later.

 

4. It's Like That [167 points]

First place: Never [it came second thrice]

Last place: Never

 

The song: What a comeback. Mariah's first radio hit in years and the first Mariah song I've ever heard in a club. I got a bit overexcited when they played it and I had to thrust my drinks on people, and push others out the way, so I could do the whole 'chickens/ash/lotion' hand movement she does in the video. Fatman Scoop needs the work so it's nice Mariah gave him a call. Let's go now, what!

 

Carey canon: Mariah Carey has always been a full-bodied young woman. We assume she eats a few meals each day and, as such, is a good role model to young people everywhere.

Fatman Scoop is a different matter entirely. He's very fat indeed. He's not the first porker Mariah has worked with. She has also collaborated with Jadakiss, Missy Elliott, Aretha Franklin, Nate Dogg - and three of Westlife are not exactly thin either so they we can add them to the list.

 

Let's do this thing...

 

At #3 is a mid-tempo ballad produced by Jermaine Dupri about lost love which made #1 in America....

 

...Don't worry. It's not that one.

 

3. Don't Forget About Us [169 points]

First place: Never [it came second thrice]

Last place: Never

 

The song: My last post pointed out the many similarities on paper between this song and her mega-hit 'We Belong Together'. Truth is, the songs do not sound that similar at all and ignore anyone who tells you otherwise.

It's not quite as good as 'We Belong Together', and it's one of my least favourite songs on the album to be honest, but it's brilliant to for a long-time fan to get two sets of strong new material by Mariah Carey in a year.

'Don't Forget About Us' matches the formula of the other JD tracks and I do think 5 singles by him was a bit much. Mariah's ad-libs on this song are brilliant though and she's got a #1 out of it. I just don't like it that much.

Many of you do and that's what matters in this survey.

 

Carey canon: Christ, Mariah's been dumped again. The poor woman's only had a few boyfriends yet she's had, apparently, enough heartbreak to fill 16 years of albums. Are there no happy Mariah love songs?

Why yes, there are. There's the easy pop of 'Melt Away' [NB best song ever], the summery bliss of 'Underneath The Stars' [NB on the same album as the best song ever] and how about the deleriously upbeat 'Fantasy' [NB, seriously now, buy 'Daydream'].

 

Left in the game we have a sophisticated mid-tempo album track produced by Mariah's main grammy rival.

 

And the biggest hit of last year year in America produced by a man who's porked both Janet Jackson and Usher.

 

2. Stay The Night [187 points]

First place: Once

Last place: Never

 

Well this suprised me. This humble little album track beating the heavily played and discussed singles 'Don't Forget About Us' and 'Shake It Off'. It's the only song to be in everyone's top ten and the underdog was able to sneak into second place. Of course, it was never going to be #1 on this list but it done good anyway.

 

The song: Mariah's been dabbling with hip-hop for a decade. Some of her remixes are fabulous and I think superior to the pop originals: 'Heartbreaker' is a good example of this. The limp mid-tempo hip-hop sound of 'Charmbracelet', and IMO of 'Shake It Off', was decidely unfabulous. Those songs were just a bit 'meh'. 'Stay The Night' is brilliant. From that sample to the best ad-lib freak-out on any track on Mimi ('you keep on keep on keep on sayin baby baby baby' etc). Mariah's vocal range is shown in its full glory: she can belt out notes when needed without shouting the entire song (there's a Kelly Clarkson comment to be made here, but I won't make it because I may be lynched). Perfect. Yes, Kanye West might be a bit up himself but he's given us all this to enjoy. Good man.

 

Carey canon: I thought this was the best album track on 'Mimi' (though not the best song) and you have collectedly agreed with me. So here's my list of the best album tracks on all her other studio albums.

 

'Mariah Carey' - 'All In Your Mind'

'Emotions' - 'And You Don't Remember'

'Music Box' - 'Music Box'

'Merry Christmas' - 'Jesus Born On This Day'

'Daydream' - 'Melt Away'

'Butterfly' - 'Close My Eyes' ('Breakdown' is better but it was a US single so I could not count it)

'Rainbow' - 'Petals' ('Crybaby' is better; same problem as above)

'Glitter' - 'All My Life'

'Charmbracelet' - 'Subtle Invitation'

 

1. We Belong Together [213 points]

First place: Eight times

Last place: Never

 

The problem with this rank was that we all knew what was going to be #1. I do hope everyone's enjoyed it anyway and there have been quite a few surprises along the way.

Out of 12 voters, 11 put this song in their top ten. Trampy Trev was the odd one out, refusing to put this ballad even in his top ten, though he did deem the remix his second-favourite.

 

The song: The voice has indeed returned. Mariah effortlessly flits between whispers, whines and wails in this song. The way she crams lyrics into the smallest possible spaces in the second verse is extraordinary. It was a massive hit for Mariah and was almost her third UK #1: both feats would have been deemed impossible at the start of this year.

 

Carey canon: Mariah's back-to-back videos were a first for her. The two videos for 'Heartbreaker' both featured her alter ego Bianca but they weren't exactly a narrative sequence.

Her comeback this year was just extraordinary if you look at when she had her #1s previously.

She had at least one #1 every year for the first eleven years of her career (1990-2000 inclusive). She had not had one since then, which was a five year gap.

Honourable mention must go to 'Loverboy' which peaked at #2 despite terrible press and little radio support. As a lead artist, her singles since 'Loverboy' had peaked in the 80s or lower in the US. Her big comeback 'It's Like That' peaked at #16.

Then came the #1.

 

Bump. That's your lot.

Thanks Tim, I HATE TO SEE JOY RIDE SO LOW THOUGH :(

A lot of songs far too low, I think I would rate them differently now if we did it again. :D Joyride was robbed though, AGAIN. -_-

I still havnt put it on, *puts it on*