Our Green-led council here in Brighton & Hove is being slaughtered in the right-wing press because primary school teachers have been told that they should refer to "your grown-ups" as a catch-all term to cover parents, grandparents, foster parents or whoever looks after the children at home. Naturally, it is being portrayed as if the council is telling children that they shouldn't call their parents Mum and Dad. In my experience, teachers always try to avoid referring to "your parents" or "your mums and dads" when addressing the whole class. They would only refer to a specific parent (or parents) when talking to an individual child. Even then, they would only do it if they knew who that child lived with. Otherwise, they would use a generic term. Yet again, the right-wing press (including The Times in this case) is trying to start a culture-war with a total non-story.

"your folks" is what I remember hearing from secondary, sounds better to me than "your grown ups". then every permission form always stated "parent or guardian". but indeed what a non-issue to be politicised now.

I quite like that. 'Your folks' is something we always used in my small town.

 

The stereotype of more traditional people used to be that they would be polite. I don't understand how some of this current crop of 'conservatives' seem to have lost that part. It is quite irritating to be honest. It was one of the few things I used to appreciate - we might not see eye to eye but at least they wouldn't be rude to your face. Now it seems anyone suggesting something more polite is shot down as some kind of traitor to grammar.

It’s not something I’ve ever thought about tbh lol. I suppose Mum and dad could be anyone these days so maybe makes sense but I think in this culture war world people just think too much and get annoyed about things that really on the surface don’t matter to much without trying to be patronising. But the right love these debates as it takes away from the important issues.

I just say "whoever's at home", it covers all bases if I'm talking to a wider group of students where I don't necessarily know their home situations. For those I work closely with I'll obviously use mum/dad/whatever as appropriate. I don't think it's something that really needs to be a debate when I know most teachers try to be as inclusive as they can anyway.

We used to address everything as parent/guardian but now all written correspondence goes to ‘person with parental responsibility’.

 

I personally just tell my students I will be contacting home. At that point it doesn’t matter who they live with, home covers all.

I just refer to Mum and Dad in the classroom but I don't believe I'm held to the same standard. In any case, all communication from our school goes out using the Chinese word for 'parents', as that's just the expected norm.

 

If I were in the UK I'd be expecting to use and see 'parent and guardian' but complaining about what is actually used is entirely right-wing crybaby nonsense.

We used to address everything as parent/guardian but now all written correspondence goes to ‘person with parental responsibility’.

 

I personally just tell my students I will be contacting home. At that point it doesn’t matter who they live with, home covers all.

"Home" is what most teachers use in the secondary school I'm working in at the moment. It's a perfectly good catch-all term.

Our Green-led council here in Brighton & Hove is being slaughtered in the right-wing press because primary school teachers have been told that they should refer to "your grown-ups" as a catch-all term to cover parents, grandparents, foster parents or whoever looks after the children at home. Naturally, it is being portrayed as if the council is telling children that they shouldn't call their parents Mum and Dad. In my experience, teachers always try to avoid referring to "your parents" or "your mums and dads" when addressing the whole class. They would only refer to a specific parent (or parents) when talking to an individual child. Even then, they would only do it if they knew who that child lived with. Otherwise, they would use a generic term. Yet again, the right-wing press (including The Times in this case) is trying to start a culture-war with a total non-story.

 

Your Grown Ups is a really bad term, too informal and almost belittling of the parents. However mum and dad/grandparent is a bad term. A couple of incidents in my childhood have always made me confirm if someones family are alive before referring to them in specificity. My sister was once sent a piece of homework asking her to speak to her grandparents about the war, this caused a few issues as all of our grandparents were deceased!!

 

Another one was an incident where I made a typically benign 'your mum' joke to a classmate in secondary school after momentarily forgetting this classmate's mum had recently committed suicide and had just come back from time off due to mental health issues relating to the bereavement. Never have I wanted the ground to swallow me up so much in my life as the rest of that day. A genuine mistake, and the classmate was rightly furiously angry but eventually saw the funny side of it, eventually he'd joke about it himself, but that was certainly not the time and place to make that sort of joke. Poor f***er was told a few years later by a supply teacher he'd be ringing his mum!! 'Good luck with that' was essentially the response, made it slightly politer for BJ company.

 

I think the best term is something ambiguous but formal like 'Your parental guardian' or To the Guardian/Carer of [Child]'. Anyone can be one of those, formally or informally so I can't see the need to go any further.

Edited February 20, 20223 yr by Chartfridays

Your Grown Ups is a really bad term, too informal and almost belittling of the parents. However mum and dad/grandparent is a bad term. A couple of incidents in my childhood have always made me confirm if someones family are alive before referring to them in specificity. My sister was once sent a piece of homework asking her to speak to her grandparents about the war, this caused a few issues as all of our grandparents were deceased!!

 

Another one was an incident where I made a typically benign 'your mum' joke to a classmate in secondary school after momentarily forgetting this classmate's mum had recently committed suicide and had just come back from time off due to mental health issues relating to the bereavement. Never have I wanted the ground to swallow me up so much in my life as the rest of that day. A genuine mistake, and the classmate was rightly furiously angry but eventually saw the funny side of it, eventually he'd joke about it himself, but that was certainly not the time and place to make that sort of joke. Poor f***er was told a few years later by a supply teacher he'd be ringing his mum!! 'Good luck with that' was essentially the response, made it slightly politer for BJ company.

 

I think the best term is something ambiguous but formal like 'Your parental guardian' or To the Guardian/Carer of [Child]'. Anyone can be one of those, formally or informally so I can't see the need to go any further.

As far as I know, correspondence is addressed to Parent / Guardian as happened when I was at school many decades ago. This is mostly about primary school children so "grown-ups" is a simple catch-all term. As has been pointed out elsewhere, Blue Peter have used the term "Get a grown-up to help you" for a very long time. They were certainly saying it when I watched the programme as a child.

I'm not a teacher or parent, though I have part-brought-up niece & nephew back in the 80's when they were young. I would prefer "Guardians Of The Galaxy" and most of my many nephews and nieces would agree, as super-heroes have been big for generations in our family, and a lot of parents are heroes... :D

 

Given one of the former-partners of a member of the family was barely above 19 when (deliberately) getting pregnant after going out a few weeks, and push themselves into large debts by lying compulsively, and borrowing money off everyone they know (3k off me which I'll never get back), getting kicked out of every flat they live in and owing back rent, "grown-up" is a bit ambiguous in some cases...

I'm not a teacher or parent, though I have part-brought-up niece & nephew back in the 80's when they were young. I would prefer "Guardians Of The Galaxy" and most of my many nephews and nieces would agree, as super-heroes have been big for generations in our family, and a lot of parents are heroes... :D

 

Given one of the former-partners of a member of the family was barely above 19 when (deliberately) getting pregnant after going out a few weeks, and push themselves into large debts by lying compulsively, and borrowing money off everyone they know (3k off me which I'll never get back), getting kicked out of every flat they live in and owing back rent, "grown-up" is a bit ambiguous in some cases...

 

If there was curable sterilisation treatment we should probably give it to people on their 12th birthday and take it off them on their 25th birthday.

 

I'm not saying nobody young can be good parents, I've known some excellent teenage/young adult parents in my time, but some horrendous ones too.

I'm at a complete loss as to why this even matters. Do the right-wingers making a meal of it honestly not have anything better to do with their pathetic pointless lives?

Lol, and they say the left always find things to complain about x

 

I've always said 'parents' or 'at home', and sometimes use mum and dad depending on who I'm talking to and if I know their parents or not (some are very involved at every stage and some I've never heard from), I've never worked specifically with a looked-after child thus far, though I don't know if 'your grown ups' is appropriate in my setting, so I'd probably say 'Your Guardian' as is customary anyway or use their name if I know it.

Lol, and they say the left always find things to complain about x

 

I've always said 'parents' or 'at home', and sometimes use mum and dad depending on who I'm talking to and if I know their parents or not (some are very involved at every stage and some I've never heard from), I've never worked specifically with a looked-after child thus far, though I don't know if 'your grown ups' is appropriate in my setting, so I'd probably say 'Your Guardian' as is customary anyway or use their name if I know it.

 

The right believe the economic arguement has been won in the 80s so are going all out attack now on the culture wars and undoing all the social progress made since the 60s!

The right believe the economic arguement has been won in the 80s so are going all out attack now on the culture wars and undoing all the social progress made since the 60s!

 

They think the economic argument was won in 2019, thanks to the ENTIRE British and American states attacking Corbyn and Bernie, colluding with their own RIGHT WING OLIGARCH party structures. That's why they are now in all-out attack on progress. But, society has progressed. These dinosaurs arw a joke to the majority of people.

The 1980s saw the end of the post 1945 consensus and Breton woods system.

We had a girl in my class who was raised by her older brother after her parents passed. I'd forgotten that until now.

The 1980s saw the end of the post 1945 consensus and Breton woods system.

 

And yet they haven't attacked societal progression with a lunatic frenzy until recently

My school always used the term ‘parents or guardian’. I think that covers most bases wouldn’t it?