Posted February 8, 200718 yr http://www.hecklerspray.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/02/c.jpeg Christina Aguilera Enjoys Being Nude On The Sabbath hecklerspray was married once. It was the hardest three weeks of our life. When we realised it just wasn't going to work out, we put Svetlana back in her crate and priority-mailed her back to someplace in the communist bloc. Before the end though, right around week 2, we really did try to save things. hecklerspray even put in the extra effort to dress super-sexy, but if your wife has no idea what Captain James T. Kirk's model #1 yellow Federation Captain's uniform looks like in the first place, there is apparently no turn-on value whatsoever. We even had the boots. State run television is so stupid! Christina Aguilera likes to dress sexy for her marriage too, as does her 3' tall bony albino husband. Oh wait - we totally messed up our facts there. The two don't dress to spice up their marriage, they stay naked all day long. We think we got her husband's description right though. We know because we saw him in a dream once. A baby-wanting Christina Aguilera and her remarkably slender new husband like to stay naked all day long on Sundays. It's probably pretty hard. We say that because we heard wasps like to nest in overly exposed penises, and overly exposed vaginas oft get stuck on doorknobs. But to heck with danger! Because sometimes sexy measures must be taken! Aguilera explains her exciting naked fun on Ellen DeGeneres' talk show: "We claim ourselves to be cosiest couple ever. We have something called naked Sundays…You have to keep marriage alive, spice it up… We just celebrated our first anniversary, and on Sundays we just do everything in the house, and we're just cozy and laid back. We do everything naked. We cook naked." Of course you all realise that to Aguilera, 'naked' can't mean that much. From the videos we've seen she doesn't wear a whole lot of clothes anyway, so on Sundays she likely just peels off that fruit roll-up she calls a top and counts it good. Her remarkably slender husband on the other hand, he's probably gotta strip off all kinds of c**p. If he's anything like us, to get naked he's gotta take off three pair of pants and 25 lbs of badminton gear. Because it's the sport of kings, that's why.
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