#530. Geri Halliwell - Lift Me Up

1 week at #1 in 1999 (#31 of 35 for '99)

 

 

I don't usually care about vocals that much, but Geri's voice seems especially flat and off key in this song. She was never the greatest vocalist, though. The song itself is really sluggish and monotonous. It doesn't really go anywhere til the key change, which was probably why they added it in the first place. I prefer camp Geri over whatever this is. “Look At Me” and “Ride It” are my probably my two favourite singles of hers, and of course they're 2 of her songs that didn't go #1.

 

Wtf at this video though :blink:

#529. Westlife - Queen Of My Heart

1 week at #1 in 2001 (#27 of 30 for '01)

 

 

This song sounds like "Lean On Me" mixed with "Mull Of Kintyre." I think there might even be bagpipes in this. The melody is just too common. And the expression "you know you are the queen of my heart" is just too cheesy.

Edited June 19, 201411 yr by n4yr

#528. Will Young - Light My Fire

2 weeks at #1 in 2002 (#26 of 29 for '02)

 

 

This is my tenth birthday #1. Of course it was. So Will Young's second single was a stripped down cover of The Dorrs classic, which he sang on Pop Idol at some point. It's disappointing that his first single after winning the show was a cover song. And then his 3rd single ("The Long And Winding Road") was yet another cover song as well. But in 2002 there was no way this wasn't going straight to #1. It's better than his winner's single, at least. But it's too stripped down. To the point where there's nothing interesting left in the song. It's a song about passionate sex but there's just something about Will's version that doesn't feel that sexy. By the end of the song, he sounds more desperate for sex than anything.

#527. Hear'Say - The Way To Your Love

1 week at #1 in 2001 (#26 of 30 for '01)

 

 

What a complete nothing of a song. It sounds like a Backstreet Boys or Britney or S Club 7 reject. Oh, Wikipedia says it was produced by Stargate. Now it makes sense. I seem to remember 2001 being the year when all those Max Martin-y type songs were on the way out, so this sounds a bit dated by this point. There's really only one on hook "every day every night"; and it's not even that strong of a hook. These lyrics.. yikes. Very lazy and uninspired.

 

Ok I guess there is a lot of Westlife and Popstars/Idol in this section. :lol:

Edited June 19, 201411 yr by n4yr

#526. Akon - Lonely

2 weeks at #1 in 2005 (#23 of 25 for '05)

 

 

Akon's an odd artist. I've completely blanked on him ever releasing music in 2005. I'm familiar with his string of hits in 2006/07. But I came to know him as one of those artists that features on every song in existence for some reason, though it's been a while since we've really seen him; "Play Hard" aside. (Also, wow, I never realized that he hasn't released a studio album in 6 years!) So, this was his second single off his debut album. The Chimpunk-ed Bobby Vinton sample is rather grating on this, and pretty much ruins the song for me. It's a song about him regretting the one that got away, and he's feeling lonely (obviously.) I have a hard time taking this sentimental side of Akon seriously. Maybe I'm being harsh because I can't get the image out of my mind of everything Akon has done since. I don't know.

Edited June 19, 201411 yr by n4yr

I really like Lonely, Akon reminds me a bit of Fuse ODG, just makes great catchy songs

I really like Lonely, Akon reminds me a bit of Fuse ODG, just makes great catchy songs

 

Completely agree!

#525. Dizzee Rascal - Dirtee Disco

1 week at #1 in 2010 (#31 of 34 for '10)

 

 

His other club bangers before this one felt fun. This one just feels forgettable. The usual trite lyrics of partying in a club. Repeating the word "disco" a bunch of times doesn't make much of a hook.

#524. Deep Blue Something - Breakfast At Tiffany's

1 week at #1 in 1996 (#21 of 24 for '96)

 

 

This is one of those songs that people either seem to really love or really late. Put me the latter category. The song is about two people drifting apart because they have nothing in common. Then it goes to one of the most awkwardly written choruses ever. “And I said what about Breakfast at Tiffany's?; She said I think I remember the film; And as I recall I think, we both kind of liked it; And I said well that's; the one thing we've got”.. like what? I get that they're trying to make it awkward on purpose to make it a realistic conversation, it all comes down to sharing something so trivial in common, but it's very difficult to put it to a tune. They do it by odd enunciation and over emphasis of certain syllables; which just makes the whole thing bloody annoying. And I don't think it's enough to salvage a relationship lol.

Edited June 20, 201411 yr by n4yr

#523. X Factor Finalists 2010 - Heroes

2 weeks at #1 in 2010 (#30 of 34 for '10)

 

 

So after doing “Hero” in series 5... they do “HeroES” in series 7. Yeah, not confusing at all. I don't really have an opinion one way or the other on this one. Oh, fetus 1D. Too much Katie Waissel.

 

#522. Ricky Martin - Livin' La Vida Loca

3 weeks at #1 in 1999 (#30 of 35 for '99)

 

 

It's like they tried to make this as loud and as irritating as possible. The instrumental is noisy. Ricky's chorus is noisy. Like everything is recorded at top volume. I hate the “COME ON” parts. The lyrics are beyond stupid. Of course it's a bad song. There's no way this was ever meant to be anything but a bad song. But I just don't find it an enjoyable bad song.

#521. Westlife - You Raise Me Up

2 weeks at #1 in 2005 (#22 of 25 for '05)

 

 

So we were spared a Westlife #1 in 2004 (mostly cuz of Brian leaving the group though) and this was the first single to be released since his departure. By this point I'm getting tired of writing about bland Westlife cover songs. This feels a bit different from the others, so I rank it higher for that reason. What makes it different is that this song is basically a church hymn; choir and all. Though there's an Irish violin breakdown in the middle for some reason. By this point, Westlife are now obviously catering to the 60 and over crowd. Umm what else can I really say? It's still dull like their other ballads.

Edited June 20, 201411 yr by n4yr

#520. Outhere Brothers - Boom Boom Boom

4 weeks at #1 in 1995 (#15 of 17 for '95)

 

 

Well you know the other one was bound to show up soon rather than later. So for their follow-up single, they repeat the same formula as their previous one. Replace raunchy lyrics about oral sex with raunchy lyrics about anal sex. Replace the annoying "wiggle wiggle" with a slightly less annoying "boom boom boom." I'll admit the "hey-oh" parts are kinda catchy, though.

 

#519. Steps - Stomp

1 week at #1 in 2000 (#38 of 42 for '00)

 

 

Normally, I'd love an overly camp song like this. But I guess this is too childish for me. It is practically a children's song. Very basic lyrics.

 

Omg the dancing in this video.

Steps' songs are a bit too childish for me too. Which explains why I used to love them but grew out of them at around the age of 7.

#518. Dappy - No Regrets

1 week at #1 in 2011 (#28 of 30 for '11)

 

 

When I said I had fond memories of 2011, it doesn't mean I love everything from that year. :P

 

From the very first time I heard this song, I always thought it was a really lame song. It tries so hard to be an inspirational anthem, but it just falls flat. It's sending two different messages at once here: he's living life without regrets; and faith has kept him going in life. The video definitely reinforces the latter, as does the church choir at the end of the song. But the two messages don't necessarily go together and they don't combine well in this song. It feels like Dappy is using these two life philosophies as his excuse to be smug and arrogant, and there's just something patronizing about it. It also feels like Dappy is playing the victim here and I find it hard to sympathize with him. “I'm a changed man now, Chris Brown” is one awful lyric and comparing himself to Kurt Cobain is a bit much. And what's with the key change lol.

No Regrets is great, Dappy's music is a guilty pleasure for me

Steps' songs are a bit too childish for me too. Which explains why I used to love them but grew out of them at around the age of 7.

Yeah, I've never been able to get into most of their songs. I love "5, 6, 7, 8" for some reason though. :lol:

Your music taste is bad.

 

I still adore the most Steps songs, but can't believe how "Stomp" (their weakest single) was # 1 and their classics "One For Sorrow", "Say You'll Be Mine", "It's The Way You Make Me Feel" wasn't.

Edited June 21, 201411 yr by Alex.

#517. Eminem feat. Rihanna - The Monster

1 week at #1 in 2013 (#28 of 30 for '13)

 

 

I know this placing is going to be controversial. So, I'll try my best going in depth with this one. Let's start with the production. It's boring and it's basic and it's a good four years out of date. Next, the chorus. It's really weak and anit-climatic. It all builds up to the line “well that's nothing” (though it sounds like Rihanna says “not fair”; the lyric is indeed “nothing”), but it's not sung strong enough (except at the very end), and it's not that creative of a phrase. The “wah-ooh-ohh”'s, which just feel like a substitute for lack of lyrics, aren't a very strong hook either. And then Eminem is making weird sounds like yodelling. And finally the lyrics. The song itself is about Eminem's internal conflict of wanting to be famous and doing what he's born to do, but also wanting privacy and a normal life (and it discusses some of the other perils of fame.) This conflict is driving him insane, literally. Which is what “the monster” in his head is all about. But he's “friends with the monster”, so he embraces his own instability. Which is fine as far as subject matter goes. It's a bit of a dark subject, and Eminem has made plenty of dark songs before. But this song isn't that dark. It's quite the opposite, actually - it's rather relaxed and upbeat. Though it's nice to have a break from constant angry Eminem, it just doesn't work for me. I'll take “Love The Way You Lie” over this any day.