Suedehead2’s Sub Chart Commentary w/e 17th Aug 2023

 

It’s a 10-week Sprinter marathon, and an Irish Victory for Cian Ducrot!

 

 

 

It’s 10 weeks for the UK’s longest-running number one UK rap act track, as Dave & Central Cee get OCC recognition for the feat with Sprinter. Meanwhile the Barbie chart-record for consecutive tracks in the top 40 continues, including the 3 in the top 5 which equals Grease’s 45-year-old record. Nothing much has changed though, Billie Eilish still at 2, Dua Lipa still at 3, and Nicki Minaj & co switch a place with Olivia’s vampire, which returns from the undead to 4. The stakes were just not high enough, I guess.

 

Another serial guest vocalist is up into the top 10 at 09, but Becky Hill’s got lead credit this time: Disconnect gives co-creditors’ Chase & Status a first top in 10 years. In related news they also climb to 21 with Baddadan. Calvin Harris & Sam Smith rise with Desire to 12. Not a Perfect 10, though. Ryan Gosling edges it up a bit to 13, I’m Just Ken, he modestly claims. The best Ken song of all time, though, is clearly Kate Bush’s magnificent ode to Ken Livingstone, from Comic Strip Presents. Either that, or Suzi Quatro’s Ken The Ken. Suzi has a new album out with KT Tunstall, sadly not in the charts though.

 

Anne-Marie drops out the top 5 albums this week, but she rises to a new peak of 18 with her UNHEALTHY duet with Shania Twain, a great record too. Ditto Daniel O’Donnell up to 16 with So Much In Love. It’s great to see Dan dumping the old rubbish country covers for dance music, though his voice seems in a higher register these days. TBH D.O.D.’s track is better than anything his namesake has done, possibly the second best record with that title after the obscure-but-fab Duke minor hit. Bou and Slay, meanwhile, are up to a new peak of 26 with Closer.

 

Which brings us to the highest new entry, Doja Cat gets a 13th top 40 hit with Paint The Town Red at 20. She’s sometimes very very good. Dionne Warwick is always very very very good. Her worst-ever recording soars a little bit higher than this one: Doja has sampled a couple of seconds of Dionne’s classic and timeless Walk On By, a true eternal great, and turned it into an annoying nursery rhyme with the audio equivalent of dribble all over it. Apparently some rival gal gets on her nerves, she raps, rubbing her bank statement and record sales in her face, using the B word, and suggesting she herself puts da D-word in her kidneys. Is that medically possible? Certainly not advisable Doja, calm down, spend your money on a nice beach holiday instead! There’s also a new entry from Travis Scott at 31, presumably cos one of the previously biggerly-streamed tracks off his not-number-1-anymore album has been overtaken this week by TELEKINESIS. Sza and Future lend a hand on his 19th top 40 track in the week that some-audience-members in Europe could have done with powers of TK-based-levitation. I’m assuming insurance for Travis Scott concerts exceeds his streaming income at the moment.

 

 

 

 

On albums, Cian Ducrot pips at the final post with Victory an optimistically-titled on top of the pile. The Irish singer-songwriter’s debut album comes off the back of 2 top 20 hits while current pleasant single Heaven sounds not entirely unlike Eurovision winner Arcade, Duncan Laurence’s global hit. Skindred debut a closely-fought contest at 2: Smile is not the lost-Beach Boys album, it’s a fourth top 40 album for the Welsh metal band, now 25-years into their career, It’s also the first to even breach the top 10, so pretty much a success! New at 4 is The Sherlocks, with the new album People Like Me & You, who are possibly defying imposed school Grammar lessons on you and I. The South Yorkshire Indie band are on album number 4, all of them top 20, and hit a new peak with People Like Me & You.

 

Miles Kane falls enters highly but not on top, sadly, with new album One Man Band - his debut solo album, Colour Of The Trap went top 20 in 2011, and the new one makes it 5 in a row, and gains a new peak position of 5. Miles is maybe as well-known as half of the fabulous Last Shadow Puppets along with Arctic Monkeys’ Alex Turner. Leo Sayer once sang about being a One Man Band, but the first actual one-man-band was Don Partridge in 1968 with hits Rosie and Blue Eyes who played all of the instruments while singing and standing. I think some contemporary musicians might struggle with a portable synth glued to their back, not to mention being a bit of a health & safety assessment nightmare. Filling the gap this week is not The Weeknd - gasp! - it’s Travis Scott’s UTOPIA at 3. Or, more like Dystopia for some of us.

 

It’s been 13 years since N-Dubz last assaulted the charts, but they’re back and grab a 4th top 20 entry at 6 with Timeless. My nephew is getting all excited about the new tour and reunion and this album. I didn’t want to rain on his parade, but it seemed like about 5 years ago since they last recorded and I could have done with another decade or so before 00’s nostalgia started up. I’m guessing the title is ironic and they have a wonderful sense of humour. The usual shuffling elsewhere in the chart, but a new anniversary deluxe release brings Snow Patrol’s Final Straw back at 28, 2 decades on from peaking at 3.

 

 

And with that I bid a fond adieu for now! Ciao!

 

 

Congratulations on coming up with a pun even more corny than some of mine!

Congratulations on coming up with a pun even more corny than some of mine!

 

Only a fool would try and outdo the Punmaster, but it never hurts to try :lol: