dandy*

17 | Dr Hook - When You're In Love With a Beautiful Woman Weeks at number one: 3 End of year position: 5 Rating: 3/10 Well I said last time that I couldn't relate to a song with religious lyrics, well it's a similar story here with the song that knocked Lena off the top as I definitely can't relate to being in love with a beautiful woman. But I gather it's hard. This is very much of its time and the lyrics really don't hold up today do they, maybe not quite as bad on the cringe scale as something like Rod Stewart's Da Ya Think I'm Sexy level but it's definitely second tier at best. Reading the lyrics just now, it reads like it is essentially a song about fragile male egos with a narrative along the lines of: 1. Wherever you go other men will be trying to steal her away from you. 2. You need to watch where her eyes are going because she's definitely on the look out for something better than you can offer. 3. You can't even trust her with your own friends because she will be so easily tempted. 4. Be permanently alert for all the lies she's bound to be telling you whilst she covers up her harlot ways. Now I can accept that maybe there's a chance this was supposed to be a humorous song at the time maybe? And I do get that humour has evolved over the years and that it's not always quite fair to judge retrospectively, but sadly without any memories of the time to link this track back to I'm stuck with just finding it all a bit too cringy to ever be able to enjoy. I guess the groove to it is nice enough so that's a positive at least, but even that doesn't really compare to the production of most of the other tracks to come. This one prevented Crazy Little Thing Called Love from reaching the top so it's another case of denying a song which has definitely gone on to be a lot better remembered.

Glad everyone is on the same page so far! I do think there'll be at least one or two that people may not agree with me on in this list but we'll see... ...and Jester I really do think you need to listen to it!

Both are very mid, I was tempted to nil vote

Intriguing that you said Ben Shepard there Hassan, I also said to Mr D* that it sounded like it could have been him this week. I can see all the Tom Daley hints but I just can’t imagine he’d sound like that - but I don’t know why I think that to be fair!

ps I'm mentally preparing myself in case Julian now has to have words with me 🫣

18 | Lena Martell - One Day at a Time Weeks at number one: 3 End of year position: 10 Rating: 2/10 So we kick things off with a song that sounds very much at odds with everything else that features in this list. Apparently Lena is from Glasgow, which I find very surprising as I'd always assumed that this was from the USA, it does after all have a typically religious and country theme that would be popular in the USA - but not only does it sound out of place in being from the UK, if it weren't for the fact I know I'm ranking songs from 1979 then I'd have sworn it was much older so I'd say it's also very much out of its time too. It is really very bizarre to think that this was #1 in the UK just 3 months before the beginning of the 1980s. This is one of two songs that languish quite far behind the others for me and I've been debating which of two I find the worst, in the end this one takes it due to its lyrical themes. I've been an atheist for quite some time now so I just find it really difficult to get on board with the lyrical content on display here, it's all just so preachy and corny - it sounds like something that could easily pass for a parody in the "We like both types of music around here, country and western" section of the Blues Brothers film. I just can't get past it all so it perhaps inevitably ends up being the first song to fall. Even more frustratingly, this was out at the same time as classics like Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough and Gimme Gimme Gimme that would have made far better and more representative #1s for the period. Out of interest - was anyone around at the time this was out? I'd be really intrigued to know if there was a reason this became so popular in the UK that I'm not aware of, it really does feel very out of sync - kinda reminds me of how out of place The Millennium Prayer was when it was so successful in 1999.

Oh I’d forgotten that it goes to people who’ve never hosted, I was panicking when I realised Scene didn’t and Cameron may not want to host - phew!

Why would anyone do this? 😭

01 Like a Prayer 02 Frozen 03 Vogue 04 Hung Up 05 Into the Groove 06 Music 07 La Isla Bonita 08 Papa Dont Preach 09 Sorry 10 4 Minutes 11 True Blue 12 American Pie 13 Who's That Girl

Hello all... it's my turn to take on a year and I've chosen to go with our first foray back into the 70s. I'm not hugely familiar with the 70s but this is the year that I was born so I was intrigued to see what I thought of the chart toppers of the time. Turns out there are some decent ones along the way and a few genuine 10/10s here, but before we get to them I'll be starting with the song that I've ranked 18th...

WIMH as track 13 bodes well. At least we know all the commercial stuff is front loaded and should mean that they’re confident in other tracks

Whaaaaatttt? Oh no! If you’re in touch, please pass on my best wishes - I’ll definitely miss her lots!

The decision to stop at top two has been noted

I too gave 18 to Banks, a great choice

Well done Scene, congratulations on your first win. Always lovely to see a new winner <3 I don’t think I would have spotted it as a winner before the odds started to roll in but it’s a good song. Also go Colm bagging a first top 10 hit! Another I wouldn’t have guessed but I loved it as entry, kinda Lemon Jelly vibes going on there. I am so relieved that Faouzia didn’t flop! I know it was predicted to do well but I was definitely noticing that there wasn’t actually anyone saying that they liked it so had readied myself for it not doing as well. Thank you in particular to the 5 of you that gave it 18 - there can’t be many songs that get an 18 from both Jonjo and Brer!!! Thanks Dan for hosting, as reliable and impeccable as ever

Nothing jumping out at me either, although I think it's been similar for a couple of years now.

Yep! Sorry!! 😂 I tried to give them all a fair shot but I just really struggle to take to them... although I definitely do like some Troye songs so there's a reasonable chance he'll feature highly in later rounds.

Loved ABBA-Esque at the time, wouldn't ever have thought it would have generated the highest sales of the year so far though - surprised! Lay All Your Love On Me was the track I remember getting all the focus (I think I've said this before in a different thread for some reason) but that's because I'd have been listening to Radio 1 and it was the focus track on radio. It was a good tactic having the focus differ between radio and tv channels as that must have helped to promote it - and maybe is why it sold comparatively well for them? Utah Saints are my other favourite, Something Good is probably their best song even though I did really enjoy all their singles from the early 90s. George Michael not bad as well, at the time I was surprised that fell back in week 2 as I assumed it was likely to challenge for #1.

Oh gosh... hope you're okay Jake?

01 Florence + the Machine - Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up) 02 Scissor Sisters - I Don’t Feel Like Dancin’ 03 Erasure - Drama! 04 Blondie - Maria 05 HAIM - Forever 06 The Corrs - Breathless 07 Ace of Base - All That She Wants 08 The 1975 - It’s Not Living (If It’s Not With You) 09 A1 - Same Old Brand New You 10 The Chicks - Goodbye Earl 11 ABBA - As Good As New 12 Girlicious - Like Me 13 Atomic Kitten - The Tide is High

01 Nelly Furtado - I’m Like a Bird 02 Chappell Roan - Good Luck, Babe! 03 ROSALÍA - MALAMENTE (Cap.1: Augurio) 04 Delta Goodrem - Innocent Eyes 05 Lily Allen - URL Badman 06 Kesha - Praying 07 Kelly Clarkson - Walk Away 08 LiSA - QUEEN 09 FKA twigs - ride the dragon 10 Cher Lloyd - Sirens 11 Michelle Branch - Everywhere 12 Toni Braxton - You Mean the World to Me 13 Nadia Oh - Hot Like Wow

01 David Bowie - Life on Mars? 02 The Weeknd - Blinding Lights 03 George Michael - Faith 04 Guitarricadelafuente - BABIECA! (this was my favourite by far from the ones I've not heard before) 05 Nik Kershaw - The Riddle 06 Fred again.. & The Blessed Madonna - Marea (we’ve lost dancing) 07 Shawn Mendes - Teach Me How to Love 08 Troye Sivan - Got Me Started 09 Luke Black - VOMIT 10 Eric Saade - Made of Pop 11 Ruel & DMA’S - What a Life 12 Conan Gray - Actor 13 Markus Riva - You Make Me So Crazy

Lots of good songs, my votes no doubt could have been different on another day but it's not another day and I'm in a Hyperballad mood 25 Bjork - Hyperballad 24 Radiohead - Karma Police 23 Pet Shop Boys - Rent 22 Taylor Swift featuring Bon Iver - Exile 21 McAlmont & Butler - Yes 20 Plastic Bertrand - Ca Plane Pour Moi 19 Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark - Enola Gay 18 Suede - Beautiful Ones 17 Mary J Blige - Family Affair 16 David Bowie - Golden Years 15 The Prodigy - Smack My Bitch Up 14 Bloc Party - Flux 13 Noel Harrison - The Windmills Of Your Mind 12 Michael Jackson - Smooth Criminal 11 Rufus and Chaka Khan - Ain't Nobody 10 The Beatles - Yesterday 09 Ash - Shining Light 08 The Stone Roses - Fools Gold / What The World Is Waiting For 07 Creedence Clearwater Revival - Proud Mary 06 Meat Loaf - Bat Out Of Hell 05 M-Beat featuring General Levy - Incredible (remix) 04 Black - Wonderful Life 03 Grandmaster Flash and The Furious Five - The Message 02 Depeche Mode - Just Can't Get Enough 01 Lily Allen - Pussy Palace

Florence would have been my #1 choice for an act that I think has the potential to win… and whoever did choose them has gone for exactly the song I would have chosen first too

Wow some people really have gone all in with their first choices