Melodifestivalen 2013 / Heat 3 · Skellefteå - Eurovision Song Contest

Posted February 12, 201312 yr

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So, despite the horrors of that above picture, last week only went and ended up being the most viewed Melodifestivalen heat EVER. And we steamroll ahead to Skellefteå (which, despite the spelling, is pronounced 'hwell-ef-tee-or', but just clear your throat at the beginning of the word if in doubt) in the north of Sweden, for what looks to be the most painful heat of death in quite some time. And for those disappointed by this year so far, that will be VERY welcome indeed. We've got an openly gay man so beautiful I'm seriously considering abandoning civlisation and dedicating a cult to him (but not only that, he's on a track by the co-writers behind EUPHORIA AND ON TOP OF THE WORLD. There aren't enough disco emoticons in the world to express my excitement), the winner of Swedish Idol, the ex-lead voxalist of BWO, and a track only passed up by Agnes because she's too much of a dour cow to return to Melfest but which is the current favourite to win in the odds. You've all got NO EXCUSE, this week's going to be an absolute cracker. And the first so far this year I can watch live! *.*

-x-

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Eddie Razaz - Alibi

Text och Musik: Peter Boström och Thomas G:son

Best known for: 6th on Idol a few years back, formed a duo called Rebound! who had a hit with Hurricane in 2010

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 2.75 / 7/4 / 4th

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 21 / 20/1

Hold me back ladies. I know he doesn't look his best in that photo there, but frankly remembering that this week was RAZAZ WEEK left me in a state of excitement more extreme than any I've ever felt, at least since a version of On Top of the World featuring an incredibly clunky key change (crowbarred in using the power of technology) hit my inbox on Sunday evening. (What can I say? Melodifestivalen brings me to extreme states of excitement with preternatural ease; shoot me.)

Anyway, SPEAKING of On Top of the World, you may have noticed those LÅTSKRIVARNA. Well, remember how tremendously overexcited I got about On Top of the World last week? And remember how TREMENDOUSLY RIGHT I was proved with the unveiling of God's message in the form of the Wives? (R.I.P.) Well basically, take half the justification for that excitement and add a painfully beautiful man to it too. This is basically going to be the joy of Eric Saade multiplied by the joy of Euphoria and THE WIVES (♫ I just wanna feel, I just wanna feel, feel your body heat, feel your body heat ♫). Like I said - HOLD ME BACK. Everyone loves a stomper, and this one's set to be MASSIVE. Can Eddie win over everyone's hearts PLUS mine?

(If so, get the fuck in line as I've been waiting for MONTHS for this one.)

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Elin Petersson - Island

Text och Musik: Elin Petersson

Best known for: She's NOT.

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 9 / 8/1 / 7th

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 101 / 100/1

Ah, the WEBJOKER. It's been going for four years now and the only half bloody worthy thing out of it's been the tragically overlooked

in 2011, and it hasn't delivered a single qualifier to date. So you can see why this year SVT decided to shake it up a bit and instead take the option to leave the webjoker if they didn't think it was good enough, but nonetheless this still got picked. Let's bite our tongues that this lass got in over the likes of a Nanne Grönvall return or the Melfest début of Elisa's if she turns out to be yet another makeweight.

Anyway, she's an unknown, this 'melancholic' pop track was handpicked by Christer, and I'm seriously hoping it was sodding worth it considering what she's in over. Can she hope to get much further than the bottom two this Saturday?

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Ravaillacz - En riktig jävla schlager

Text och Musik: Kjell Jennstig, Leif Goldkuhl och Henrik Dorsin

Best known for: Tommy Körberg was the first to play The Russian in the Benny och Björn musical Chess, which you may know for deeply ironic hen night karaoke staple I Know Him So Well. He's also entered Eurovision a couple of times for Sweden, most recently in 1988 with

. The others are all pretty well known schlager boilers, and I'm not talking schlager in the Charlotte Perrelli/Linda Bengtzing sense here.

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 3.75 / 11/4 / 6th

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 34 / 33/1

That song title translates as 'A proper fucking schlager', but cast thoughts of a male version of last week's Pensionar (or even a male On Top of the World. Don't even TRY to make the joke.) out of your minds (although this very much WILL be a male Hanson, Carson och Malmqvist affair) - expect something a little more dansband, a little more

. Namely, it's going to be an absolute max track which you will all feel immensely guilty about loving. Some of you may even protest to hate it with a deep passion, particularly when it rockets ahead of your votes into andra chansen off an immensely powerful nostalgia vote. But when you hear it, I dare you to look me in the eyes and tell me you wouldn't declare this to be a 13/10 standout track of life if it were given a little updated production and they whacked a vag on vox. I DARE YOU.

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Amanda Fondell - Dumb

Text och Musik: Freja Blomberg och Fredrik Samsson

Best known for: Winning Swedish Idol in 2011, and her proper lead single

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 2.25 / 5/4 / 2nd

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 17 / 16/1

This bitch is somehow three years younger than me. (Could've FOOLED ME LOVE!)

She's described this as 'dark, dramatic, mystical and magical', and lord knows how that's going to turn out for her. She's entering surprisingly early given you'd assume she didn't really need the publicity at this point, only being a year past winning Idol (I don't know how to express the parallel, but it wouldn't be hugely unlike Little Mix all entering Celebrity Big Brother or I'm A Celeb a couple of months ago, except a lot less low-rent) - so she has a lot to lose from entering at this point. Given that, we can safely say this must have something to it for her agent to risk it all on her entering a contest which can break stars just as quickly as it can make them (if not moreso), although having won only a year and a bit ago this would have to be quite mediocre indeed for her to be struggling for enough public votes to manage at least second. As it is - I think she'll be through easily. And I think 16/1 looks incredibly long for odds on overall victory given she's definitely one of the big contenders this year. Can Amanda live up to the hype?

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Martin Rolinski - In and Out of Love

Text och Musik: Thomas G:son, Andreas Rickstrand och Martin Rolinski

Best known for: Lead vox on some of the

of

with BWO, 2nd in MF 2006 and 3rd in MF 2008, entrants in MF 2005 and 2009. Had his début single Blame It On A Decent Matter in 2011.

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 2.5 / 6/4 / 3rd

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 21 / 20/1

Oh this man has pedigree. And that songwriter list screams contender. But despite the overwhelming brilliance of his début Blame It On A Decent Matter a year and a half ago, he has yet to have a hit in his own right in Sweden, which makes me incredibly doubtful over whether or not this could actually go the distance that the bookies seem to think it will. He promises electropop that's different from what we've heard from him before, although the question of whether Sweden will buy it without Bard at the helm is yet to be answered. Can they?

(Personally, I'm kept awake at night SALIVATING at the prospect of this meeting Army of Lovers in andra chansen. IMAGINE.)

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Caroline af Ugglas - Hon har inte

Text och Musik: Heinz Liljedahl och Caroline af Ugglas

Best known for:

, 2nd in MF 2009 via andra chansen by a mere 4,000 votes; media phenomenon at the time, unheard from since

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 3.25 / 9/4 / 5th

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 26 / 25/1

Right, let's just get this out of the way: YES Snälla, snälla was a work of towering, fragile beauty, and may even have been the rightful choice for Sweden in 2009. NOT that you'll hear that from me - I swear eternal fealty to

. (Your faves could almost certainly QUITE LITERALLY NEVER.)

But that does NOT mean this is by any means an automatic contender (so JAM EDDIE'S PENDULOUS APPENDAGE IN IT PAVEL, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT), for lest we forget, dearest hag Cazza got nowhere with her prior entry

in MF 2007, and as yet she's shown no signs of recreating the lightning that struck so close with Snälla, snälla in the four years since. Her media schtick will probably be less appealing four years on, and this has a LOT to live up to. I'm near certain it'll struggle to hit AC, but can Caroline sum up her goodwill from last time and make it through this heat to dance the dance of andra chanse again to andra plats?

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State of Drama - Falling

Text och Musik: Göran Werner, Sebastian Hallifax, Emil Gullhamn och James Hallifax

Best known for: Winning the Metro on Stage contest in Sweden last year. I can't find much beyond that.

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 15 / 14/1 / 8th

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 101 / 100/1

Well, given this heat seems to be almost SOLELY targeted at the gays who may have been lost in the last two weeks I suppose we can fit in room for scraps for the hetties, even if it's likely to be a total piss break. A pop-rock group who have yet to provide us with any information on the song they'll actually be entering, but I'm not expecting anything special at all. Neither are the bookies. Can State of Drama provoke anybody to even slightly care on Saturday?

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Janet Leon - Heartstrings

Text och Musik: Fredrik Kempe och Anton Malmberg Hård af Segerstad

Best known for: Former member of Swedish girl group PLAY, had a hit in 2009 with

Ladbrokes odds on going direkt till finalen (decimal / fractional / projected finish): 1.73 / 8/11 / 1st

Ladbrokes odds on winning Melodifestivalen (d / f): 6 / 5/1

This was offered to Agnes. The dour old moo with the intolerable voice turned it down, but a look at the songwriters coupled with the pull that Agnes would be able to muster for an MF comeback should hint at something pretty big indeed. And it was so - word is that this will be The Track. The one that wins the year, that pulls in the gays and the casual viewers, and that brings the glam to a Melodifestivalen which has had to rely on a socially awkward 17 year old transvestite and a begrilled reminder of the virtues of birth control to bring the audience-approved glamour so far this year.

It's got a Kempe topline (he hasn't written uptempo for a pop strumpet since Charlotte Perrelli's

and The Girl, and that should be getting you VERY excited indeed). It's got Anton Le Kid production which has reportedly delivered us a dance/pop/disco confection. It's got a money note. In short, it's got absolutely everything you should want from Melodifestivalen, and my excitement levels have been set as high as they can go after the heartbreak of THE WIVES (R.I.P.). I'm gleefully awaiting the opportunity to be stunned. But given Janet's an unproven live performer, will we be stunned by the quality of the live performance, or instead by the lack thereof and an inexplicably poor shock result?

-x-

DISKUTERA

Edited February 12, 201312 yr by Kanduälska

February 12, 201312 yr

Author

I mean christ just LOOK AT HIM

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I don't CARE if this inevitably puts me in an unholy alliance with Pavel, but I need this hot bitch DIREKT TILL MY ROOM

February 12, 201312 yr

Author

Oh, and:

DTG: Janet Leon, Amanda Fondell

AC: Eddie Razaz, Ravaillacz

05: Caroline af Ugglas

06: Elin Petersson

07: Martin Rolinski

08: State of Drama

Edited February 12, 201312 yr by Kanduälska

February 12, 201312 yr

When I first read who was taking part in this DV I thought Janet Leon was a dead cert for a Mimi Oh/Elin Lanto/Linda Sunblad result, but after reading THAT I'm jumping on my chair want to just hear a SNIPPET of sheer brilliance. Plus, she was in PLAY and I had no clue. Rosanna and Faye have two tracks that I could just die for so this bitch better deliver.

Then I'd like to see Amanda Fondell or Martin Rolisnki going DTF (and the latter batteling it our with Army of Lovers in Stockholm instead of AC). On Eddie Razaz I can only hope he's got something up his sleeve which is one level up from "Hurricane" (and he IS quite something to look at isn't he? Even if Persian is not really my style...)

Caroline... I DARE her to give us something that's better than Snalla Snalla. I DARE!

Semifinal of DEATH. Hopefully death of the other 3 songs.

February 12, 201312 yr

I mean christ just LOOK AT HIM

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I don't CARE if this inevitably puts me in an unholy alliance with Pavel, but I need this hot bitch DIREKT TILL MY ROOM

YES!

DOUBLE YES!

TRIPLE YES!

MILLION TIMES YESSSSSS.

SO hot.

February 12, 201312 yr

Janet's Let Go was so great, I was deliberating for ages whether to send that or Not A Love Song to BJSCXIV. I plumped for the latter in the end but I'm still of the opinion that either would have won, such was the awful general quality that month :o

I'm pretty much looking forward to hearing all of these, I'm really hoping that Caroline doesn't disappoint, Snälla, Snälla was stunning. Such a shame that it didn't quite win in 2009 but at least we didn't have to be subjected to an English translation butchering I guess. Every cloud...

February 12, 201312 yr

I will never ever ever understand the hype for Snalla, Snalla - just a dull song sung by a wobbly voice to my ears.

February 12, 201312 yr

She was flawless live (still in the top three best singers I've ever seen/heard live), and the song is magical, such gorgeous production and a simple yet beautiful melody. Plus Caroline is amazing, such a nutjob, but in a good way :lol:

February 12, 201312 yr

Queen Af Ugglas > everyone

February 12, 201312 yr

I'm with Rob on this (as I always seem to be on these kind of things :lol:), not that I was ever a huge fan of "La Voix" but the fact it beat that by a few thousand votes was it's saving grace.

February 12, 201312 yr

Less than 4k :cry:

February 12, 201312 yr

Amanda Fondell >>>>>>

Very excited for Heartstrings though, all this talk of it being 'The One' as well as ex Play members having a brilliant track record (hello Waterfall and Water Against The Rock), plus Kempe being on board means it's very very likely to blow the rest of the competition so far away.

Oh and Eddie Razaz get in my bed *.*