Welcome to the Tartford National Thread

 

 

Some stats:

 

Capital City: Scumville

Population: 17 million (rounded to the nearest 17 million)

Spoken Languages: Drivel

Ethnicities: All kinds. There is no discrimination in Tartford. Everyone is treated with equal contempt.

Leader: No one knows.

Currency: Other people's money

 

Our "Greatest Hits" or our qualifiers if you like:

 

Place/Score/Act/Track

 

03 335 Matt Maeson: Hallucinogenics (Seeb Remix)

04 258 Hybrid: Finished Symphony

08 237 Air: Ce Matin La

08 234 Ofra Haza: Im Nin'Alu

09 232 Bimini - Rodeo

09 203 Empress Of - Save Me

11 206 Marsheaux: Safe Tonight

14 200 Maria Nayler: Naked & Sacred

15 201 Yvonne Elliman: Love Pains

17 195 Son Lux: You Don't Know Me

19 196 Mylo: Need You Tonite

20 180 E'voke: Runaway (Biff 'N' Memphis Mix)

20 177 Judie Tzuke: We'll Go Dreaming

21 163 Vera Blue: Lady Powers

22 080 Maria Hazell: Say It Like You Mean It

23 178 Crystal Castles: Concrete

23 169 Maria Hazell: Killing All My Darlings

23 165 Craig Armstrong ft Elizabeth Fraser: This Love

23 160 Three 'N One Presents Johnny Shaker ft Serial Diva: Pearl River

23 156 Post Precious: Lose Myself

24 176 Time Frequency: Dreamscape '94

24 161 Pet Shop Boys: Radiophonic

25 169 Q-Feel: Dancing In Heaven (Orbital Be-Bop)

25 161 Cigarettes After Sex: Nothing's Gonna Hurt You Baby

26 153 Florrie: Hungry Like A Wolf

27 134 Seeb & Alexander Stewart: Would You Lie

28 162 Nicolette Larson: Lotta Love (12" Mix)

28 061 Humate: Love Stimulation

30 157 Tungevaag: Young Summer

30 049 Sky Ferreira: Dynamite State

31 138 Middle Kids: Stacking Chairs

31 133 E'voke: Arms Of Loren (Nip 'N' Tuck Edit)

32 137 Sons Of Sonix ft Melanie C: Numb

32 132 Metronomy: The Look

33 118 Cigarettes After Sex: Keep On Loving You

35 117 PVA: Talks (Mura Masa Remix)

36 121 Real Lies: Oh Me, Oh My (Nicotine Patch)

36 111 HARLOE: One More Chance (Latroit Remix)

36 100 Animotion: I Engineer

36 095 Alides Hidding: Hollywood Seven

38 129 Otto Knows: About You

38 105 Amanda Ghost: Idol

38 090 Capulets: Pushing

38 085 José Padilla ft Angela John: Who Do You Love (Chicane Remix)

40 102 Music Instructor: Rock Your Body (Brainbug Remix)

41 098 Alex Party: Wrap Me Up

41 059 Alex Gaudino & Jerma: Reaction

52 027 Belinda Carlisle: Goodbye Just Go *

 

* One Big Final - came last, so doesn't really qualify as a proper qualifier, but as Poor Brave Tartford have far more DNQs than Qs I'm including it. So there!

 

Speaking of DNQs, here they all are. Look at how many they've been!:

 

Human League: Human (Chinese Whispers Remix)

Sweet xx: When It Was Me

Claudia Brucken: Everyone Says "Hi"

Mandy Smith: I Just Can't Wait

Jenifer: L'Amour & Moi

White Lies: First Time Caller

Muttonheads ft. Eden Martin: Dancing With The Stars

ShyBoy: Wouldn't It Be Good

Disco Citizens: Footprint

Nicky Romero ft Anouk: Feet On The Ground

Ola Salo ft Kleerup: Got You

Petite Meller: Baby Love

Sharon Forrester: Love Inside

Venemy & BH: Stay Strong

Stereo Love ft Sara Loera: Sara (7th Heaven Remix)

Dusty O: Where Is My Man

Skinny: Failure

Jody Wisternoff ft Sian Evans: The Bridge (Chicane Rework)

Dominique: I Think I'm Fallin (Manotett Remix)

BLKMGK ft. Amina Mine & Jayy Starr: You Don't Deserve Me

Luce Drayton: To Be Loved (Disco Citizens R&D Edit)

Le Youth ft Sydnie: If You're Leaving

Razz ft Aviella : Overthinking

Hyper Go Go: High

Cruel Youth: I Don’t Love You

Sweet California: Tears On My Pillow

Lisa: Rocket To Your Heart

Marsheaux: Get The Balance Right

Girly: Working Girl

U.S Girls: Rosebud

I'm From Barcelona: We're From Barcelona

Grace Jones: Nipple To The Bottle

Mathew V: The Coast

Uniting Nations: Is This Love

Raúl Orellana: The Real Wild House

BT ft Jan Johnston: Remember

The Pipettes: Stop The Music

Groove Armada ft Todd Edwards: Lover 4 Now

Brother Brown ft Frank'ee: Under The Water

Electribe 101: Talking With Myself '98 (Canny 12" Vocal)

The Go! Team: World Remember Me Now

Milk Inc: La Vache

Madleen Kane: You Can [Razormaid Remix]

Scarlet Fantastic: Make Way For Love

Betty Boo: Hangover

joel: Good Parts

Alex Christensen & The Berlin Orchestra ft Yass: Fotonovela

Petite Meller: The Drummer

Alexia: Goodbye

Leif Coffield ft Wuh Oh: Falling In Love Again

ALIKA: Too Much

Yoko Ono: Walking On Thin Ice (Felix Da Housecat Tribute Mix)

SILK & Paige Cavell: Reason

Andreas Dorau: Girls In Love

Lonnie Gordon: Catch You Baby (Pete Hammond Remix)

 

To be fair, several of these were perhaps deserved in retrospect, but others were the result of a hate crime I'm sure!

Edited May 19, 20241 yr by AH Gold

 

Just FYI this is your flag (I think Ryan made it for you in LIX) unless you want to change it at some point :magic:

 

http://i.imgur.com/lT87JjK.png

Just FYI this is your flag (I think Ryan made it for you in LIX) unless you want to change it at some point :magic:

 

http://i.imgur.com/lT87JjK.png

 

No, that flag is fine thanks :D

The people of Tartford would like to express their enormous gratitude for making it into the final with Say It Like You Mean It. They are literally jumping up and down with joy! Mind you, they are always pissed on cheap alcopops, so they'd be jumping up and down regardless. Nevertheless, they're grateful all the same.

 

Here's to another bottom 5 finish :cheer:

Say It Like You Mean It surely must be your first non-bottom 5 finish. Am rooting for this

:cheer: :cheer: :yahoo:

 

TARTFORD COME 22nd IN FINAL!

 

A huge thank you to everyone who voted. There was even an elusive 12 pointer! This is our best result and the first time we've not been bottom 5 in a final! :o Say It Like You Mean It has even managed to sneak into a few personal charts. #39 in Therm's and #37 in popchartfreak's. And unsurprisingly No.1 in AH Gold's (although it's the very first Tarty BJSC entry to top the AH Gold Chart after being named as an entry).

 

Such success probably won't last as three of our potentials for the next contest have DNQ written all over them. But stranger things have happened.

 

Plus congrats to Bre for winning. A very strong drum n bass track which should have received a couple more points from us on reflection.

 

Here's an update of our scoring history:

 

From You To Us

 

1. Cadelicia 20

Signerpurear 20

3. FSR Rontvia 17

4. Unovia 12

5. Danaelanda 10

Harmonica 10

Mdice 10

Xanaga 10

9. Isconia 8

10. Jamvale 7

Sandenia 7

Skall 7

Yehesi 7

14. Cumulonimbia 6

Fljotavik 6

16. ALTYR MUUNILINST 5

Hushkanukia 5

Ethanola 5

HENDINIA 5

Ojnoj 5

21. Bignia-Zaragovina 4

SANDEBÖRG 4

Syndare 4

24. Aquafina 3

Daehun 3

Federal Republic Of Ashton 3

Ramryina 3

28. FARC 1

 

From Us To You

 

1. 45 - Bignia-Zaragovina

2. 41 - FSR Rontvia

3. 39 - Greenfroze

4. 35 - Daehun

5. 31 - Jamvale

6. 24 - Aquafina

7. 23 - Terra Avium/Terra Dinosaur

8. 21 - Allecian

9. 19 - Danaelanda

19 - Euphoriffith

11. 18 - Ojnoj

12. 17 - D'yermak'er

13. 15 - B.A.N.G

14. 14 - FARC

15. 13 - Federal Republic Of Ashton

13 - Kylienips

13 - N DNTN

13 - Ramrynia

13 - Singerpurear

20. 12 - Oslol

12 - Quotosibb

12 - Sangria

12 - Usfland

24. 11 - Aeroche

25. 10 - Farahtyn

10 - Frahliso

10 - Tyronosaurusland

28. 9 - Fljótavík

9 - Mdiče

30. 8 - Deandria

8 - Ingermanlandia

8 - Sandebörg

8 - Séyetana

8 - Skall

8 - Trifoski

8 - Yehesi

37. 7 - Syndare

7 - Utopia

7 - Xanaga (United States Of Russiatron)

40. 6 - Angelicland

6 - FNT Nickodonia

6 - Kingdom Of Shadow

6 - Quintessa

6 - Unovia

45. 5 - Altyr Muunilinst

5 - Faztickle

5 - JRK-Off

5 - Persephonia

5 - Terra di Campioni

50. 4 - Bellamia

4 - Bhangra

4 - Cumulonimbia

4 - Espen

54. 3 - Desbuanda

3 - Elëdan

3 - Nonsuch

3 - Varakë

58. 2 - #00274E

2 - Cadelicia

2 - Ferverosia

2 - Isconia

2 - Tinnmark

63. 1 - Pendulous Republic of Nørk/Kopecka

And now, on to our next entry

 

 

it's fingers crossed all round for Tartfordians as we hope to do the unthinkable - qualify for the second final in a row! Stranger things have happened...

 

Also, bizarrely, our other potential entry has been entered by someone else! We were certain of a DNQ but we hope it does well. A little hint - this track was released in the same year the original version of our entry made the charts. It would have got a 12 from us, but we're in the other semi. Doh!

 

As you were...

Edited September 8, 201410 yr by AH Gold

:snif: :snif: :snif:

 

FLOP FLOP FLOP

 

It was the third time Tartford sent a male vocal track, and the third time Tartford came dead last in a semi final. Back to dance/female vocals next contest then :rolleyes:

 

Still, there's several great discoveries in this contest and we're keeping our fingers crossed for...

 

 

well a balladised cover of an 80s song was never really gonna appeal to the buzzjack masses. It certainly didn't deserve to finish last in its semi anyhow, I ranked it 20th in the semi excluding my entry.

well a balladised cover of an 80s song was never really gonna appeal to the buzzjack masses. It certainly didn't deserve to finish last in its semi anyhow, I ranked it 20th in the semi excluding my entry.

 

 

Yeah, I should have known better really, but thought I'd take a risk. Thanks Therm :D

Please send 90s dance songs every month. 'Love Stimulation' and 'Footprint' are both great :wub:

Capital City: Scumville

Population: 17 million (rounded to the nearest 17 million)

Spoken Languages: Drivel

Ethnicities: All kinds. There is no discrimination in Tartford. Everyone is treated with equal contempt.

Leader: No one knows.

Currency: Other people's money

 

Best country description ever :D Especially Ethnicities :wub:

Edited October 3, 201410 yr by Neil. S

Please send 90s dance songs every month. 'Love Stimulation' and 'Footprint' are both great :wub:

 

I've already got a lost 90s dance anthem lined up for next month... B-)

 

I'm quietly almost confident this month, which probably means last place in the semi again :cry:

Best country description ever :D Especially Ethnicities :wub:

 

:lol:

Right, onto our next DNQ

 

 

As much as us Tartfordians love to be bottom of the scrapheap, why not vote for this and send us through. Maybe even a few 12s. Go on, try it.. :D

Edited October 5, 201410 yr by AH Gold

DNQ...OBVIOUSLY :snif:

 

Despite high hopes and rare optimism, Tartford's latest entry Footprint failed to qualify. This has led to dire consequences in the capital city of Scumville, resulting in a mass outbreak of sulking. Not everyone has taken the news so badly though. Upon hearing the result, Minister for cheap fags and booze, Rancid Cox had this to say; "You're all dead to me."

 

Nevermind, onto finding our next entry...

 

In other news, 28 year old Sean Carter today becomes a proud granddad. He is the oldest grandparent Tartford has ever known

Will we do any better with this?

 

 

 

Will we do any better with this?

 

 

 

DNQ YET AGAIN

 

Yet again, our poor looked down upon nation came last with a male vocal track. We never learn. :snif:

 

Thanks for the 12 points FrankLuck, and all the others who voted though.

 

We are torn between two tracks for our next entry, one which is a bit of a risk (i.e a blatant DNQ) and a cheap uninspired one. Hmmm, which one to go for?......