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What retro (Pre 2000) song should take on X-Factor for Xmas 2010 that would be more apt than fellow Sony act Rage Against The Machine - Killing In The Name for next year ......

 

OK, with RATM seemingly headed for an impressive #2 placing behind the unstoppable X-Factor blandfest cover of a Miley Cyrus Disney song what old song can you suggest as the perfect antidote to take on next year's winning song in an attempt to annoy Simon Cowell .......

 

 

To start off with here are three of my suggestions .....

 

Anti Nowhere League - So What?

 

So f***ing what!

 

Well I've been to Hastings

And I've been to Brighton

I've been to Eastbourne too

So what, so what

 

Well I've been here

And I've been there

And I've been every f***ing where

So what, so what

 

So what, so what you boring little c**t

Well who cares, who cares what you do

Who cares, who cares about you

You, you, you

 

Well I've sucked sweets

And I've sucked rock

And I've even sucked an old man's cock

So what, so what

 

Well I've f***ed a sheep

And I've f***ed a goat

I've had my cock right down its throat

So what, so what

So what, so what you boring little c**t

Well who cares, who cares what you do

Who cares, who cares about you

You, you, you, you

 

Well I've drunk that

And I've drunk this

And I've spewed up on a pint of p***

So what, so what

 

And I've had scag

I've had speed

I've jacked up until I bleed

So what, so what

So what, so what you boring little c**t

Well who cares, who cares what you do

Who cares, who cares about you

You, you, you, you

 

Well I've had crabs

And I've had lice

And I've had the pox and that ain't nice

So what, so what

 

Well I've f***ed this

And I've f***ed that

And I've even f***ed a schoolgirl's crack

So what, so what

So what, so what you boring little c**t

Who cares, who cares about you

Who cares, who cares about you

You, you, you, you..

 

 

Kate Bush - Experiment IV

 

We were working secretly

For the military.

Our experiment in sound

Was nearly ready to begin.

We only know in theory

What we are doing:

Music made for pleasure,

Music made to thrill.

It was music we were making here until

 

They told us

All they wanted

Was a sound that could kill someone

From a distance.

So we go ahead,

And the meters are over in the red.

It's a mistake in the making.

 

It could feel like falling in love.

It could feel so bad.

But it could feel so good.

It could sing you to sleep--

 

But that dream is your enemy.

 

We won't be there to be blamed.

We won't be there to snitch.

I just pray that someone there

Can hit the switch.

 

But they told us

All they wanted

Was a sound that could kill someone

From a distance.

So we go ahead,

And the meters are over in the red.

It's a mistake we've made.

 

And the public are warned to stay off.

 

But my first choice would be ......

 

PIL - Public Image

 

Hello, hello, hello (ha, ha, ha)

 

You never listen to a word that I said

You only seen me

For the clothes that I wear

Or did the interest go so much deeper

It must have been

The colour of my hair

 

The Public Image

What you wanted was never made clear

Behind the image was ignorance and fear

You hide behind this public machine

Still follow same old scheme

 

Public Image

 

Two sides to every story

Somebody had to stop me

I'm not the same as when I began

I will not be treated as property

 

Public Image

 

Two sides to every story

Somebody had to stop me

I'm not the same as when I began

It's not a game of monopoly

 

Public image

 

Public image

You got what you wanted

The public image belongs to me

It's my entrance

My own creation

My grand finale

My goodbye

 

Public image

Goodbye

 

Can any of you come up with some alternatives that would sound ludicrously great being played on the chart countdown late December 2010?

 

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I love the Kate Bush one ... but I'd have to go for Public Image! I love that song for very, very special reasons!

 

Norma

From your list I'd would go for PIL. Can't help thinking that this one might get up a certain person's nose.... :lol: as it just about sums up appearing on the X factor.

 

1910 Fruitgum Company- Simple Simon Says

 

Lyrics

 

I'd like to play a game,

That is so much fun,

And it's not so very hard to do,

The name of the game is Simple Simon says,

And I would like for you to play it to,

Put your hands in the air,

Simple Simon says,

Shake them all about,

Simple Simon says,

Do it when Simon says,

Simple Simon says,

And you will never be out.

Simple Simon says,

Put your hands on your head,

Let your back bone stretch,

Simon says,

Simple simon says,

Put your hands on your head,

Let your back bone stiff,

Simon says,

Put your hands on your head,

Simple Simon says,

Bring them down by your side,

Simple Simon says,

Shake them to your left,

Simple Simon Says,

Now shake them to your right,

Put your hands on your head,

Simple Simon says,

Bring them down by your side,

Simple Simon says,

Shake them to your left,

Simple Simon Says,

Now shake them to your right,

Now that you have learnt,

To play this game with me,

You can see its not so hard to do,

Lets try it once again,

This time more carefully,

And I hope the winner will be you.

Clap your hands in the air,

Simple Simon says,

Do it double time,

Simple Simon says,

Slow it down like before,

Simple Simon says,

Ah, your looking fine.

Simple Simon says,

Now clap them high in the air,

Simple Simon says,

Do it double time,

Simple Simon says,

Slow it down like before,

Simple Simon says,

Ah, your looking fine.

 

Another song that might work, and it could kill two birds with one stone. We all know Cowell hated David Bowie, and Cowell has certainly ruined music so what about.....

 

David Bowie - The man who sold the world

:lol: @ brians suggestions, they would really be poignant!

 

maybe 'simon says' updated by a punk/rock act would be great.

 

love 'public image' , that would be fantastic.

Well, I already suggested this one on another Thread...

 

 

But I'd go along with this one too...

 

 

1989 the number another summer (get down)

Sound of the funky drummer

Music hittin' your heart cause I know you got sould

(Brothers and sisters hey)

Listen if you're missin' y'all

Swingin' while I'm singin'

Givin' whatcha gettin'

Knowin' what I know

While the Black bands sweatin'

And the rhythm rhymes rollin'

Got to give us what we want

Gotta give us what we need

Our freedom of speech is freedom or death

We got to fight the powers that be

Lemme hear you say

Fight the power

 

Chorus

 

As the rhythm designed to bounce

What counts is that the rhymes

Designed to fill your mind

Now that you've realized the prides arrived

We got to pump the stuff to make us tough

from the heart

It's a start, a work of art

To revolutionize make a change nothin's strange

People, people we are the same

No we're not the same

Cause we don't know the game

What we need is awareness, we can't get careless

You say what is this?

My beloved lets get down to business

Mental self defensive fitness

(Yo) bum rush the show

You gotta go for what you know

Make everybody see, in order to fight the powers that be

Lemme hear you say...

Fight the Power

 

Chorus

 

Elvis was a hero to most

But he never meant ---- to me you see

Straight up racist that sucker was

Simple and plain

Mother---- him and John Wayne

Cause I'm Black and I'm proud

I'm ready and hyped plus I'm amped

Most of my heroes don't appear on no stamps

Sample a look back you look and find

Nothing but rednecks for 400 years if you check

Don't worry be happy

Was a number one jam

Damn if I say it you can slap me right here

(Get it) lets get this party started right

Right on, c'mon

What we got to say

Power to the people no delay

To make everybody see

In order to fight the powers that be

(Fight the Power)

 

Fukkin' inspirational.... :thumbup:

..and this one.. The GREATEST Rock/Rap Crossover.. EVER....

 

 

Bass! How low can you go?

Death row. What a brother knows.

Once again, back is the incredible

the rhyme animal

the incredible D, Public Enemy Number One

"Five-O" said, "Freeze!" and I got numb

Can I tell 'em that I really never had a gun?

But it's the wax that the Terminator X spun

Now they got me in a cell 'cause my records, they sell

'Cause a brother like me said, "Well...

...Frarrakhan's a prophet and I think you ought to listen to

what he can say to you, what you ought to do."

Follow for now, power of the people, say,

"Make a miracle, D, pump the lyrical"

Black is back, all in, we're gonna win

Check it out, yeah y'all c'mon, here we go again

 

Chorus: Turn it up! Bring the noise![x2]

 

Never badder than bad 'cause the brother is madder than mad

At the fact that's corrupt as a senator

Soul on roll, but you treat it like soap on a rope

'Cause the beats in the lines are so dope

Listen for lessons I'm saying inside music that the critics are all blasting

me for

They'll never care for the brothers and sisters

now across the country has us up for the war

 

We got to demonstrate, come on now, they're gonna have to wait

Till we get it right

Radio stations I question their blackness

They call themselves black, but we'll see if they'll play this

 

Chorus: Turn it up! Bring the noise![x2]

 

Get from in front of me, the crowd runs to me

My DJ is warm, he's X, I call him Norm, ya know

He can cut a record from side to side

So what, the ride, the glide should be much safer than a suicide

Soul control, beat is the father of your rock'n'roll

Music for whatcha, for whichin', you call a band, man

Makin' a music, abuse it, but you can't do it, ya know

You call 'em demos, but we ride limos, too

Whatcha gonna do? Rap is not afraid of you

Beat is for Sonny Bono, beat is for Yoko Ono

Run-DMC first said a DJ could be a band

Stand on its feet, get you out your seat

Beat is for Eric B. and LL, as well, hell

Wax is for Anthrax, still it can rock bells

Ever forever, universal, it will sell

Time for me to exit, Terminator X-it

 

Chorus: Turn it up! Bring the noise![x2]

 

From coast to coast, so you stop being like a comatose

"Stan my man, The beat's the same with a boost toast

Rock with some pizzazz, it will last. Why you ask?

Roll with the rock stars, still never get accepted as

We got to plead the Fifth, we can investigate

Don't need to wait, get the record straight

Hey, posse's in effect, got the Flavor Terminator

X to sign checks, play to get paid

We got to check it out down on the avenue

A magazine or two is dissing me and dissing you

Yeah, I'm telling you...

Definately Kate Bush - Experiment IV from the above. Awesome track.

Having studied all of the songs here ... I have to now go with 'Simon Says'.

 

Good nomination Brian!

 

Norma

Heard it's going to be The Pogues and Kirsty. What needs to happen is a physical copy to be released too, on the Monday before the Xmas chart.
Heard it's going to be The Pogues and Kirsty. What needs to happen is a physical copy to be released too, on the Monday before the Xmas chart.

 

How original - it's been out on physical at least three times too. I'm personally sick to death of this song now.

How original - it's been out on physical at least three times too. I'm personally sick to death of this song now.

 

I believe the reason for that was to raise funds for Kirsty's mother to launch an inquiry into her daughter's killing/manslaughter. The true facts of the case have never really come to light. I think it would be an excellent choice actually - but to this time stress the reason.

 

As for the song itself ... I could listen to it a few hundred times (probably have) and not get sick of it ... yet one listen to an X-Factor winner song is enough to make me feel nauseous!

 

Norma

That justifies the last release then but not another one. It was out 1987, 1991 and some time in the noughties, it's in danger of becoming a new Slade.
That justifies the last release then but not another one. It was out 1987, 1991 and some time in the noughties, it's in danger of becoming a new Slade.

 

thought it already had.... im sick of it too, and its in the charts now.

I hate Fairytale and always have. It's the Pogues guy's voice. Awful.
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thought it already had.... im sick of it too, and its in the charts now.

 

I agree. I personally think it is the greatest Xmas song ever;

 

however to challenge the (Fi)X-Factor in 2010 I've thought of something that is:

 

Xmassy

very appropriate with regards to financial exploitation

not part of the Sony record label.

 

Although some of the lyrics will need updating maybe with a new version with comedy actors doing impersonations of Mr Cowell; Walsh & Mrs Cole ...... just replace the words Bad News with X-Factor winning; Woolworths with Asda/Tesco/HMV and the names of the Comic Strip/Young Ones British Spinal Tap band members with the judges on X-Factor and voila .....

 

Bad News - Cashing In On Christmas

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Hear those cash tills ring

Jingle bells make money

Everybody sing

 

Queuing up at Woolworths

To get our Christmas hit

With lots of peace and love and joy and

Jingle bells on it

This is our Christmas single

Please make it number 1

And give us all your money

To make our Christmas fun

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Hear those cash tills ring

Jingle bells make money

Everybody sing

 

Cos' we are rockin'

Ooh every Christmas we're rockin'

Say Santa Claus and we are rockin'

Ooh jingle bells and we're rockin'

Well every Christmas we're rockin', we're rockin all the way to the bank

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Hear those cash tills ring

Jingle bells make money

Everybody sing

 

*Little girls' voice*

I want to wake up on Christmas morning

With the snow all over the ground

With Bad News' Christmas single in my stocking

It only costs just over a pound

 

Hello, this is Den Dennis

I hope you're all having a very merry Christmas

This is our Christmas single, please buy it and make it number 1

For our Christmas fun

 

Hello everybody, it's Vim Fuego here,

Sorry I can't be with you this Christmas

But I'm in the Carribean with all your money

Having a good drink and a laugh

Have a nice one, merry Christmas

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Christmas girls and boys

Cashing in on Christmas

Let's make lots of noise

 

Cos' we are rockin'

Ooh every Christmas we're rockin'

Say Santa Claus and we are rockin'

Ooh jingle bells and we're rockin'

Well every Christmas we're rockin', we're rockin all the way to the bank

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Christmas girls and boys

Cashing in on Christmas

Let's make lots of noise

(Repeat to end)

 

Hello everyone this is Colin Grigson

Please give as generously as you can to Bad News this Christmas, because, remember,

There are people in the world who are much better at spending your money than you are,

And that's us. Ha ha, merry Christmas!

 

Hello, I'm Spider Webb. Heh heh heh!

 

I agree. I personally think it is the greatest Xmas song ever;

 

however to challenge the (Fi)X-Factor in 2010 I've thought of something that is:

 

Xmassy

very appropriate with regards to financial exploitation

not part of the Sony record label.

 

Although some of the lyrics will need updating maybe with a new version with comedy actors doing impersonations of Mr Cowell; Walsh & Mrs Cole ...... just replace the words Bad News with X-Factor winning; Woolworths with Asda/Tesco/HMV and the names of the Comic Strip/Young Ones British Spinal Tap band members with the judges on X-Factor and voila .....

 

Bad News - Cashing In On Christmas

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Hear those cash tills ring

Jingle bells make money

Everybody sing

 

Queuing up at Woolworths

To get our Christmas hit

With lots of peace and love and joy and

Jingle bells on it

This is our Christmas single

Please make it number 1

And give us all your money

To make our Christmas fun

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Hear those cash tills ring

Jingle bells make money

Everybody sing

 

Cos' we are rockin'

Ooh every Christmas we're rockin'

Say Santa Claus and we are rockin'

Ooh jingle bells and we're rockin'

Well every Christmas we're rockin', we're rockin all the way to the bank

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Hear those cash tills ring

Jingle bells make money

Everybody sing

 

*Little girls' voice*

I want to wake up on Christmas morning

With the snow all over the ground

With Bad News' Christmas single in my stocking

It only costs just over a pound

 

Hello, this is Den Dennis

I hope you're all having a very merry Christmas

This is our Christmas single, please buy it and make it number 1

For our Christmas fun

 

Hello everybody, it's Vim Fuego here,

Sorry I can't be with you this Christmas

But I'm in the Carribean with all your money

Having a good drink and a laugh

Have a nice one, merry Christmas

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Christmas girls and boys

Cashing in on Christmas

Let's make lots of noise

 

Cos' we are rockin'

Ooh every Christmas we're rockin'

Say Santa Claus and we are rockin'

Ooh jingle bells and we're rockin'

Well every Christmas we're rockin', we're rockin all the way to the bank

 

Cashing in on Christmas

Christmas girls and boys

Cashing in on Christmas

Let's make lots of noise

(Repeat to end)

 

Hello everyone this is Colin Grigson

Please give as generously as you can to Bad News this Christmas, because, remember,

There are people in the world who are much better at spending your money than you are,

And that's us. Ha ha, merry Christmas!

 

Hello, I'm Spider Webb. Heh heh heh!

 

Hee hee.... Yep... I think we have a potential winner here.....

black lace agadoo :P

 

Still an improvement on anything Bland Factor could possibly churn out. Artists like David Bowie and Kate Bush wouldn't get a look in if they auditioned on Bland Factor, Cowell doing his usual "I don't see you as a recording artists" slur. He really means "I can't see you as a puppet on a string".

 

Even present day pop stars like Lady Gaga would get turned away. I think she is a great face for pop, someone who refuses to conform to the boring and bland and with bags of talent to boot. Ironic she appeared on X Factor, but hey...

 

Oh yeah... RATM FOR NUMBER ONE!!! :yahoo:

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