Posted June 17, 201015 yr ČekB!tch (Kopečka's NUMBER ONE gossip mag!) makes TRIUMPHANT return with best EVER selling new issue covering Eric Saade and Elin Lanto scandals! Eric Saade IN HIDING after freak fan death! Kopeček entrant ERIC SAADE was yesterday reported to have FLED FSR Rontvia after a free concert in Klurren went disastrously wrong and led to the ONSTAGE DROWNING of a stan. The young blonde 6 foot something lady, whose name hasn't yet been released (and whom ČekB!tch, thanks to a subpoena and publishing restraining order after our shocking tampon exposé last year, must confirm is DEFINITELY NOT Eric Saade's ex-girlfriend MOLLY SANDEN, but advises readers to read between the lines here) apparently stormed onstage weeping during the climax of teen idol Saade's performance of worldwide smash 'Manboy' and in a freak accident DROWNED in Saade's infamous 'bad weather' dance sequence. Eric Saade was unavailable for comment, but was reported to be 'tired and emotional' by insider sources at the death of one of his 'fans'. Molly Sanden's family, whom we must stress have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS STORY, are reported to be 'devastated', and sister Mimmi Sanden is reportedly considering a return entry for Kopečka in the Junior BJSC 'in tribute' to the deceased 'fan'. ČekB!tch sends its condolences to the family of the death, and is leading the campaign for Eric and the ISCBK (Kopeček International Selection Committee for the BJSC) to withdraw the DISGRACEFUL and INSENSITIVE entry 'It's Gonna Rain' in the light of this tragedy and instead replace it with the patriotic and catchy collaboration between James Corden and La Roux, 'Wail For Kopečka'. Elin Lanto's secret bitching CAUGHT ON CAMERA Hendinian entrant, Elin Lanto, already infamous for her outspoken comments (having last year accused ČekB!tch of being 'one part DigitalSpy, one part The Sun, and one part despicable gossip rag' during our coverage of BJSC XXII), was CAUGHT ON CAMERA by our undercover BJSC correspondent, shamelessly bitching off her fellow BJSC entrants backstage after a promotional tour performance in Kopečka. During her TIRADE, Elin called Lady GaGa 'pretty overused', said that she 'wasn't a fan' of the Mdičen entry (I Blame Coco - Self Machine), and predicted that Hanna Lindblad 'wouldn't do much better [in the BJSC] than she had done in Melodifestivalen' with Manipulated. When questioned by our undercover reporter on what she had to say about her remarks, Elin RANTED about '[ČekB!tch] constantly making mountains out of molehills' and claimed that ČekB!tch journalists 'would douse their mothers in petrol and set them on fire for a good story, but would probably do it for a filler one anyway', and her INFAMOUSLY BLINKERED promotional manager (who during XXII called ČekB!tch 'the shameful consequence of scrapping the Privacy Act') stated that he 'really didn't see the big deal over what she said'. In light of these SHAMEFUL comments, we at ČekB!tch call on the Hendinian BJSC authorities to WITHDRAW Elin from the contest, and fully support a boycott of her in light of these offensive remarks.
June 17, 201015 yr "Overused?! I can only think of one whore that's been overused..." Official response from the King of Shadow
June 17, 201015 yr "Overused?! I can only think of one whore that's been overused..." Official response from the King of Shadow THIS. I listened to Keri's album as well, so I can justify my hate, and I was right, it is rather dreadful.
June 17, 201015 yr Elin's no stranger to the contest herself - appearance #4 clocked up this month :kink: Same with Ellie :drama: At least Lena's a BJSC first timer :magic:
June 17, 201015 yr He dated Molly Sanden :o? Sad to hear about her *potential* death though <3 Her performance at JESC will be remembered, always.
June 17, 201015 yr He dated Molly Sanden :o? Sad to hear about her *potential* death though <3 Her performance at JESC will be remembered, always. *is* dating her When I went to MF last year, Eric and Molly were standing next to me when I was queuing up to get breakfast at the hotel - I didn't initially realise who it was as they had their faces locked to each other for at least 5 minutes :drama: Of course as far as I knew at the time Eric was a nobody, I just referred to them as 'Molly Sanden and her boyfriend' but obviously he's a much bigger deal than she is now :lol:
June 17, 201015 yr *is* dating her When I went to MF last year, Eric and Molly were standing next to me when I was queuing up to get breakfast at the hotel - I didn't initially realise who it was as they had their faces locked to each other for at least 5 minutes :drama: Of course as far as I knew at the time Eric was a nobody, I just referred to them as 'Molly Sanden and her boyfriend' but obviously he's a much bigger deal than she is now :lol: I love this story, makes me chuckle.
June 18, 201015 yr Molly Sandén alive and well After ČekB!tch sensationally reported that Molly Sandén had drowned in a freak onstage accident at ex-boyfriend Eric Saade's free concert in host nation, FSR Rontvia, we contacted Molly's manager who confirmed the story was a hoax. Molly is indeed alive and well and has been regularly spotted out and about in Morpeth Quay, the exclusive Morpeth Cove suburb where she has lived since her split with Saade, who has recently come out as being Gay. Sandén spoke to our BJSC reporter yesterday and told us this, "As you can see i am alive, i did not die in Rontvia, and i have not spoken to or seen eric since we split." Molly was heavily linked with representing Ashton in Rontvia but withdrew herself after her split from Saade, who is representing close allies Kopečka. Molly Sandén starts her sold out 82 date Ashtonise tour at the Royal Ashton Centre for Music on June 21st to a sold out crowd of 5,000. [source: Ashton Times Online - Entertainment Today]
June 18, 201015 yr Author ČekB!tch: Eric Saade DENIES ALL Eric Saade yesterday SENSATIONALLY announced an intention to SUE Ashton Times for claiming he recently came out as gay, a press announcement which acted as a '1-2 knockout blow' to his fanbase in the light of the 'bad weather' fan drowning scandal (now revealed to have actually been the sister nobody cares about, FRIDA SANDEN, to the relief of music lovers). Young female fans worldwide were reported 'heartbroken' at the homosexual allegations, with reports of mass seppuku in the wake of Ashton Times' report coming in from across the globe. Eric Saade's popularity had rocketed in the wake of the ČekB!tch exclusive last month that outed Justin Bieber as a transgender lesbian, and in the wake of this further blow to teen idol credibility ČekB!tch maintains its boycott of Saade's entry for Kopečka. In other news, the ČekB!tch-backed alternative, the La Roux/Corden collaboration 'Wail For Kopečka', stayed at number one for a third week running after Kopečka advanced to the second round of the World Cup as a result of their 3-1 victory over Dalisska, which placed them top of Group B with Torchwood qualifying in second. --ČekB!tch - Why let facts get in the way of a good story?
June 18, 201015 yr Ashton Times to counter sue The Ashton Times has vowed to counter sue Eric Saade over the alleged false allegations made over his sexuality. The Sjan Tivor law firm "Marksel, Tijan and Worth", reported to be Ashton's best corporate litigation firm, are acting on the papers behalf and produced recordings from interviews with Eric Saade, Saade's Manager, Molly Sandén and Eric Saade's new lover known only as Tirren, that all outed the Swedish star. The Ashton Times said in a statement that "they used accurate, reliable, first hand evidence in the writing of their story. The Ashton Times is not the Daily Star, Scottish Sun or ČekB!tch. The paper only prints accurate and well researched stories." Online message boards have erupted with fury over Saade's announcement to sue, one poster named as 'Silas Fabray' said "The truth is out, Saade should just build a bridge and get the f*** over it. Attempting to sue one of the worlds most accurate papers is sheer stupidity. No doubt his moronic manager has advised him to do so in a vain attempt not to lose his teenage girl fanbase. He doesn't look bright enough to have thought of this himself." Source: Quilvorian Press Association - Morpeth Cove Office.
June 18, 201015 yr RontDaily looks at some of the BJSC hopefuls Daily newspaper supplement '!!!' which comes free with RontDaily, FSR Rontvia's least respected yet biggest selling newspaper has been looking at the chances of some of the hopefuls this month and has asked a panel of former contestants what they think about five randomly selected entries, as well as RTVN executive producer, Ricardo Delta. The country have been getting behind BJSC in a way not seen since XVIII, the last time the contest was hosted in FSR Rontvia. Official merchandise is on sale in all good stores across The BuzzJack world and includes mugs, t-shirts, commemorative coins and footballs bearing the Rontvain flag. Postage stamps bearing the faces of Sara Bareilles, Uh Huh Her, Beautiful Small Machines and Sheelah have also been made available. FNT Nickodonia: Ruslana; T-Pain - Moon of Dreams Hafdis Huld: This is a strange combination isn't it. It's rather lovely though in its own special way. Example: Er, just no mate...T-Pain can do better Sibel: I love this, what an inspired choice for a duet! Ricardo Delta: FNT Nickodonia always send something original and a bit different - no change here then Bhangra: The Wanted - All Time Low Pixie Lott: Hmm...this sounds like JLS doing Release Me - competent debut single Andreas Johnson: Not my sort of thing, but I like the strings! Anna Abreu: This is hot, and so are they! Ricardo Delta: This is picking up on airplay around FSR Rontvia, but I don't think it will be a big sales hit Kopečka: Eric Saade - It's Gonna Rain Damien Adore: My Melodifestivalen friend! This is even more radio friendly than Manboy somehow - great stuff Leisha Hailey (Uh Huh Her): Sorry, this is terrible - they still make music like this? Only in Sweden I guess... Caro Emerald: I like it, it's got an anthemic chorus to it which makes me want to move Ricardo Delta: Another Swedish pop song? There seem to be 30 every month! Utopia: Nightwish - The Poet & The Pendulum Fiona (Untouched): I lost concentration after the first five minutes I'm afraid Delta Goodrem: This is incredible. A stunning piece of music which I'm blown away by Emiliana Torrini: Artistically brilliant, a life changing song. I hope it wins! Ricardo Delta: An interesting listen, certainly adding some much needed differentiation into this contest Quotosibb: Eminem; Rihanna - Love The Way You Lie Mira Craig: This is smokin' hot, I can see why it's the favourite - amazing Young Ivy: Em still going strong, Rihanna's on top form - this is going to be huge Caroline Jönsson: I'm sorry, both artists are great but I don't really like this, I prefer Rihanna's more upbeat songs, this is a bit depressing Ricardo Delta: Well its the favourite at RontBet but I'm not so sure, the BuzzJack World might vote against these artists.
June 18, 201015 yr Safura joins Ashton campaign Safura has become the latest in a long line of Torchwoodians to back to "oust-Ashton" campaign. It follows Ashton's numerous threats of war to our great country surrounding Amelle, who since Keisha-gate we wouldn't touch with a barge pole anyway. "I think they're totally unreasonable", the Azerbaijani ESC 2010 representative told us, "they should be more like Kopecka and continually have orgasm swaps with Torchwood instead of that joke country FSR Rontvia".
June 18, 201015 yr Lena hits out at Torchwood claims Rontvian BJSC entrant Lena Meyer-Landrut has gone on the warpath, throwing her weight behind Ashton after arch-enemy Safura, whose ego she triumphantly deflated last month at the Eurovision Song Contest, when European smash Satellite trounced Safura's international multi million dollar chart flop Drip Drop, had made scathing comments about the nation's relationship with close allies Ashton. Lena said 'If Ashton want to go to war with Torchwood then they must have a valid reason for it, and we all know who would win that war'. Questioned over Safura's comment that FSR Rontvia was a 'joke country' that Ashton had swapped too many points with, Lena added 'I wouldn't take anything seriously coming from the mouth of that cow. Maybe I'll listen when Torchwood manage to finally win this thing but Saflopra certainly won't be helping them on their quest'. The war rages on. Lena's duet partner Ellie Goulding was unavailable for comment but her official spokesperson for her said 'Ellie really has no opinion regarding this ridiculous battle of nations and has nothing she wants, or indeed cares to add'.
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