You have to feel for Nicole, being third choice to Sam Smith whose only claim to fame is being the first openly homosexual celebrity ever and Shrek's shit.

You have to feel for Nicole, being third choice to Sam Smith whose only claim to fame is being the first openly homosexual celebrity ever and Shrek's shit.

 

I cackled.

 

Why on earth they even considered Sam Smith when it would have led to some sort of hideous falsetto duet battle I'll never know. That said, it may have been so unlistenable it would have given Saara an extra push.

But would it have been worth Saara winning if half the nation had been rendered deaf and the other half suffered from prolapsed anuses? Answers on a postcard

But would it have been worth Saara winning if half the nation had been rendered deaf and the other half suffered from prolapsed anuses? Answers on a postcard

 

A mental image of famed homosexual trailblazer Sam Smith and "prolapsed anus" was not one I needed this evening.

Consider it my Christmas gift to you, if nothing else it'll help you shift a few pounds before the big day.

As if the Spice Girls / GEM's reunion would be a duet with a contestant on X Factor, I don't believe that ever was going to happen.

When you're talking about former X Factor judge Mel B, former guest X Factor judge Geri and many time Judge's Houses helper Emma, I definitely think it's within the realms of possibility.

Their solo songs have apparently been confirmed to be:

 

Saara Aalto: Everybody Wants To Rule The World (Tears For Fears/Lorde)

Matt Terry: Take Me Home (Jess Glynne)

5 After Midnight: Crazy In Love (Beyonce)

Decent choices all round, it'll be quite interesting to her Take Me Home sung by someone with a vocal range greater than a thimble. Though, inevitably, he will end up caterwauling over most of it anyway.

Love love love the Lorde version of Everybody Wants to Rule The World. I am not sure how it'd work with Saara's tone though.

Sara's song is incredible even if I'm not sure it's necessarily a vote getter. She'll be fantastic especially if it's anything like that guy who sang it on America's Got Talent this year. I assume that's why the song has found itself in The X Factor song selections.

 

I wonder if 5AM will do the tour version with the slow start before popping off 30 seconds in.

 

At least Matt can't sound that much worse than old Jess herself. As long as he reigns it in a bit.

Saara singing Bohemiam Rhapsody AND Everyboy Wants to Rule the World?

 

Amazing choices!

I really hope Bohemiam Rhapsody isn't true.

Ooh Matt's done a duet of 'All I Ask' with a theatrical performer before, so if it's anything like that, excellent!

Ffs what about Saara'a Eurovision song :(

Exactly, where's Euphoria