'Sadness Part 1' is brilliant and different in style to what usually made the chart. Panpipes were certainly a trend in the early 90s - they were in Cliff Richard's 'Saviour's Day' and New Atlantic - 'I Know' too

 

George Michael 'Jesus To A Child' is stylistically not a million miles from Enigma anyway, it even has flute sounds in it too. It's a very good ballad and I didn't know it had such a sad backstory to it. It's sad that George Michael is no longer with us.

 

I didn't like it at the time but now, Basshunter's 'Now You're Gone' I unashamedly really like - I love its energetic production and yes the 'ready for takeoff' bit. 2008 was the last year for that sort of Clubland sound in the charts.

 

Jennifer Lopez's 'Love Don't Cost A Thing' I liked at the time on the music channels for its tropical video especially.

 

Aaliyah's More Than A Woman' is a very good R&B track. It's sad she died so young :(

 

Foreigner's 'I Wanna Know What Love Is' isn't as good an 80s rock power ballad as John Farnham's 'You're The Voice' or Mr Mister's 'Broken Wings' in my opinion.

 

Armand's remix of 'Professional Widow' is great, I didn't really like it at first though, I now think the 'whooshes' and 'wow's of the production are epic, and I really like the more typical Tori Amos 'beau-ti-ful ang-el.....' bit in it

Edited January 20, 20232 yr by TheSnake

January 21st

 

Today we celebrate the 73rd birthday of Billy Ocean and the 47th birthday of Emma Bunton from the Spice Girls! Happy birthdays!

 

1984. "Owner of a Lonely Heart"

Yes

{US0543/-}

 

Yes was one of the most beloved prog rock acts of the '70s, yet they sadly disbanded at the start of the '80s. But in a surprising twist the former members cobbled back together into the band and released some ready-for-Mtv synth rock jams, one of which managed to top the billboard charts. Such a fascinating turn of events.

 

 

But I don't think "Owner of a Lonely Heart" counts too much as a sell-out move. It's still a pretty engaging song, with lots of interesting switchups and rhythm bending. And those guitar riffs are incredible, they rock so hard! It has a slightly off-kilter sounding chorus, but it still manages to be danceable at the same time.

 

It definitely feels like something the Buggles would have released in their prime (which makes sense given it was produced by a Buggles member), and I like the Buggles, so I like this.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

1989. "Two Hearts"

Phil Collins

{US0680/-}

 

 

Phil Collins had previously released Motown covers, but this is one of his first forays into self-composed Motown pastiches, and it absolutely blows. The song attempts to harken back to the '60s pop soul sound without fully grasping what made the Holland-Dozier-Holland trio of producers such brilliant composers in the first place. The production is extremely hocky rather than charmingly retro, and it is otherwise very dull and flat too. There's none of the richness and density that defined the golden age of Motown. Phil Collins laboriously attempts to do a soul singer impression, but he sounds more like a washed-up session singer than anything else. And what a pathetic excuse for an unmemorable hook!

 

Rating: 4/10

 

--

 

2006. "Grillz"

Nelly ft. Paul Wall, Ali & Gipp

{US0920/-}

 

Oh no, what is this...

 

 

By 2006, Southern rap had completely dominated the rap charts, so Nelly, a Midwest rapper, had no choice but to go full-on Southern to maintain some semblance of relevance in the face of shifting trends. The song is quite dumb on paper, being an entire ode to mouth jewerly, but it's Nelly we're talking here. He made an entire song to Nike Air Force One before this... Bragadaccio about material goods is a very big thing in rap, but usually it doesn't limit itself to one very specific type of possession, and there's the whole context of making it big despite an approvished background. This however is pretty much Nelly phoning it for 4 minutes. He has a whole crew of Southern rappers to give this some cred, and while they're pretty good, they also make Nelly seem even more of a fool in comparison. Not to mention the uncredited chorus singer interpolating Destiny's Child's "Soldier," who sounds hilariously flat and uninterested.

 

I definitely think Nelly has in him to make some serious rap jams, but this wasn't it.

 

Rating: 4/10

 

--

 

2012. "Domino"

Jessie J

{-/UK1185}

 

 

There's no denying that Jessie J has a great vocal range and can hit those high notes. However, I believe her displaying her vocal prowess throughout this song is more of a hindrance than a blessing. She has a bad habit of oversinging the verses, which makes the soaring chorus stand out less. The song doesn't breathe, and listening to it becomes quickly a chore as a result. The production also comes across as fairly generic, like a throwaway Katy Perry deepcut song. There are also plenty of laughably questionable choices in the lyrics, such as "Boom me like a bass drum, sparking up a rhythm," that are difficult to overlook.

 

It's ok, at least not as offensively irritating like "Do It like a Dude".

 

Rating: 5/10

 

--

 

2017. "Bad and Boujee"

Migos ft. Lil Uzi Vert

{US1060/-}

 

Well, at least here's some actual geniune Southern rap by a famous rap trio from the area rather than Nelly phoning in an impression of it.

 

 

"Bad and Boujee" has its own set of problems though. First of all, it's far too long for what it really is. It feels like it should have ended around the 3:40 mark, yet there's a whole entire Lil Uzi Vert verse after this. And wow is that section terrible. I usually don't mind Lil Uzi Vert as an em cee on his own songs (2017 was after all the year of the great "XO Tour Llif3"), but dear god does he sound obnoxious on this. There's a bunch of other annoying adlibs throughout the song too that don't feel like they serve any purpose besides as an attempt to bring this song to meme status. And while the production is pretty decent by gritty trap standards, I definitely wish there were some more switchups rather than it being the same thing all the way through.

 

Honestly remove that horrible Lil Uzi Vert section, tone down on the adlibs and you had a very solid trap song on your hands (it's a great shame that much better Migos songs like "Stir Fry" didn't to number one instead).

 

Rating: 5/10

 

--

 

2021. "Drivers License"

Olivia Rodrigo

{US1116/UK1183}

 

 

"Driver's License" was unquestionably the biggest surprise hit of early 2021. The song that catapulted a moderately popular Disney Channel actress into massive pop stardom. The song is satisfactory on its own. It's definitely on the same wavelength as Billie Eillish's brand of more mature and atmospheric teen pop. This song, which is essentially about heartbreak, has a lot of retain in its lyrical approach. Olivia gives a convincing portrayal of a heartbroken adolescent, and her vocals are lovely throughout. However, the production is far too flat and minimalistic for me, with simple slow piano keys dominating the majority of the song length. A strong chorus almost feels inexistant in this and even the attempt at a key change near the end somehow falls flat.

 

Still, it's a pretty impressive debut song for such a young artist, even if it's not really for me.

 

Rating: 6/10

Edited January 21, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

January 22nd

 

Today we celebrate the 42nd birthday of Ben Moody, a former member of Evanescence! Happy birthday!

 

1977. "I Wish"

Stevie Wonder

{US0412/-}

 

Stevie Wonder was on a hot streak in the '70s, putting out classic albums and classic songs back-to-back. The iconic "Songs in the Key of Life" may not be my personal favorite Stevie Wonder song (that honor goes to "Innervisions"), but the competition is so fierce that any discussion of that is largely irrelevant really.

 

 

On that album, "I Wish" is a certified gem. It's an intriguing look at the sentiment of nostalgia and how it can involve some questionable things one might do as a child. The chorus is a typical cry for the good old days, while the verses depict some cheeky details. It's a clever juxtaposition between the two parts of the song. But I think most people remember this song for its iconic, incessantly funky bassline, which is also amazing. And Stevie Wonder's wonderful voice is only the icing on the cake of that delicious song.

 

Rating: 9/10

 

--

 

1994. "Things Can Only Get Better"

D:Ream

{-/UK0701}

 

 

This sure is a '90s pop song alright. This is definitely a '90s pop song. It's your typical song about overcoming obstacles, a theme that was certainly popular on adult contempo radio around that time. Even though it contains the ubiquitous gospel elements, it is not a generic ballad thankfully. It's more like house music, which I like better, even if the house beats here are fairly generic. I'm also not a fan of Peter Cunnah's sloppy singing. He lacks proper note support on this and frequently sounds out-of-breath.

 

It's not that bad, but it's a little too wishy-washy as a pop song for me.

 

Rating: 5/10

 

--

 

1994. "All For Love"

Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart & Sting

{US0785/-}

 

 

Oh yikes, I guess there goes already my gratitude for avoiding the generic adult contempo ballad on the previous entry. Whoever thought bringing together the two raspiest voices on rock radio was a good idea for a movie soundtrack song, it really wasn't. I like Rod Stewart, I can't stand Bryan Adams, and I definitely don't like these two on the same song. They just don't sound good together at all. At least Sting from the Police provides some of the song's nicer moments and a break from all the rasp. Otherwise, this song sounds like a band of friends competing in a karaoke of a generic love song after a night of excessive consumption at the bar. And not in a charming way, but in a painful-to-sit-through way.

 

Rating: 3/10

 

--

 

2000. "The Masses Against the Classes"

Manic Street Preachers

{-/UK0845}

 

The UK certainly chose an unusual way to begin the new millennium. "The Masses Against the Classes" saw the Welsh alternative band Manics return to an angrier sound that straddled the line very closely with punk rock like in their earlier work, as opposed to the more polished sound from the few years before. This single was not part of an album cycle release, nor did it receive any type of promotion via video and certainly not radio, and it was quickly pulled from retail. So how it sold so well so quickly is to anyone's guess, but I'm glad it did because it rules.

 

 

Musically, it's a fun concoction of a sloppy rock sound, accentuated by furious vocals and heavy riffs. Thematically, it's a rant against the larger establishment, pretty much going full socialism in its thinking and not afraid of quoting from libertarian writers like Chomsky and Camus. Good stuff. 

 

Rating: 8/10

Edited January 22, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

I like 'All For Love' and its chorus actually and think its one of the better 90s ballads.

 

'Things Can Only Get Better' is a good song, I prefer 'U R The Best Thing' (1994) by them though.

The two Trevors, Horn and Rabin, certainly made a big contribution to transforming Yes from a prog rock group into a more pop leaning rock group in the 1980s. 90125 is one of my favourite Yes albums with Owner Of A Lonely Heart one of the highlights.

January 23rd

 

Today we celebrate the 69th birthday of Richard Finch, a former member of KC and the Sunshine Band!

Happy birthday!

 

1953. "Comes a-Long a-Love"

Kay Starr

{-/UK0003}

 

 

Cute little swing tune with some lively love singing on top. The type of music that was popular during World War II but declined throughout the '50s. It's bouncy and upbeat in all the best ways that swing music should be.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

1959. "The Day the Rains Came"

Jane Morgan

{-/UK0079}

 

 

"The Day the Rains Came" was a French song written in 1957, but rapidly was covered dozens of times in multiple languages throughout Europe to hit their respective countries' music markets (most notably cover by French goddess Dalida singing in German). Although still a thing nowadays, I noticed that covers of popular pop songs in a multitude of language throughout the countries was a much more widespread thing back then. This is the most popular version in the UK, despite coming from an American singer, and it's certainly not a bad one. Jane Morgan does a good vocal job on this, displaying her prowess especially in that amazing final note. Unfortunately, this version suffers from the sleepy production style that was common in '50s traditional pop with little life to it.

 

And obviously this simply doesn't compare to the dreamy Dalida version, which I highly recommend giving a listen.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1965. "Downtown"

Petula Clark

{US0126/-}

 

The British Invasion didn't just entail rock bands, you also had Petula Clark dominating on the American charts for a time!

 

 

"Downtown" is a mid-'60s pop gem with an explosive chorus that borrows heavily from Phil Spector's Wall-of-Sound formula. I love how much this sounds like something from a Broadway production. It perfectly captures the feeling of being taken aback by the bustling life of downtown one evening on a walk. And Petula Clark absolutely knocks it out of the park with her enjoyed singing.

 

Rating: 9/10

 

--

 

1971. "Knock Three Times"

Tony Orlando and Dawn

{US0248/UK0300}

 

 

No I can't, it's just too goshdarn corny. The whole setting reeks of bad sitcom tropes. So these two neighbors are smitten with eachother, but can't casually meet unless they make coded signs at eachother. Are they cheating? Whatever is going on, the whole "twice on the pipe" shtick is pretty dumb, and just seems like a sneaky but desperate attempt to make a novelty song (read proto-meme song) out of an otherwise unremarkable bubblegum pop song. Tommy Orlando is also not a good singer to me as he tends to strains his voice often to an unpleasant degree. And this wasn't technically recorded by his group Dawn, which included Telma Hopkins and Joyce Vincent Wilson , because they hadn't yet formed at the time of recording this. Tommy is accompanied by a slew of random session singers instead.

 

Rating: 4/10

 

--

 

1988. "The Way You Make Me Feel"

Michael Jackson

{US0649/-}

 

In some ways, I see Michael's Bad era as the beginning of the end for him. That's when his controversial image among the general public really took off. His trials were still a few years away, but his skin bleaching and plastic surgery definitely got tabloids already talking (although it was only later discovered that the skin bleaching part was unfairly judged on and only ever a by-product of his vitiligo).

But it certainly wasn't the end of him putting out more bangers to come.

 

 

"The Way You Make Me Feel" kind of feels paradoxical for pop song, both looking back at the past and forward at the same time. The main melody sounds a lot like a throwback to early '60s Motown, similar to something like "Shop Around" by the Miracles. However, that bassline is so hard-hitting and funky that it almost predicts new jack swing on its own. The hook is delivered in the most charismatic of ways that only Michael could provide, and the whole thing is cheery but deliciously catchy still.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

1999. "A Little Bit More"

911

{-/UK0812}

 

 

And what is this?? Charmless balladry by a faceless boy-band? Laughably bad vocals on a lifeless generic production? It's technically a cover of a '70s soft rock song that wasn't all that great to begin with, but it did have the advantages of decent singing and rich layered arrangements, neither of which are present here.

 

Who in their right mind thought this was good enough to release, and better yet who would buy this song's way to number one hit status?

 

Rating: 2/10

 

Meh! I'll go out of my way to milk this comment for all it's worth and post that gorgeous Dalida song I mentioned earlier:

 

Edited January 23, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

January 24th

 

Today we celebrate the 82nd birthday of Neil Diamond!

Happy birthday!

 

1958. "Jailhouse Rock"

Elvis Presley

{-/UK0067}

 

This could be one of the oldest ubiquitous pop classics that almost everyone, young and old, is familiar with! I won't go into too much detail about the history of early rock 'n' roll, how it was technically an appropriation of black music, and how early pioneers like Chuck Berry don't get nearly enough credit for changing the course of modern music. But, unlike many others of the time, Elvis Presley, one of the first pop megastars, was a very talented singer who at least put effort into his craft.

 

 

I don't think I need to say how much "Jailhouse Rock" rocks. It's silly, it's about a rock party in a prison, and it has some strong homosexual overtones (poor unaware Elvis plays it completely straight). Elvis truly demonstrates some incredible rock vocals on this track. It compels you to dance and have fun. The piano keys, which were popular in early rock music but sadly were later removed, add a nice touch to this. Even though it's not my favorite Elvis song, it's a worthwhile rock classic.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1963. "Dance On!"

The Shadows

{-/UK0145}

 

 

The Shadows are back, but this time without Cliff Richard, so here's an instrumental piece instead. It's a fine little slice of surf rock riffs. It's certainly well-played by the band, but there's nothing particularly memorable about it, and feels a little flat to be honest.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1968. "The Ballad of Bonnie and Clyde"

Georgie Fame

{-/UK0242}

 

Despite being fictionalized ad nauseam, the story of Bonnie and Clyde is a true story and a fascinating tale of crimes and tragic love in the context of the Depression era where both assailants knew their demise at the same time in an almost poetic way.

 

 

This is a fairly decent sung retelling of that story, inspired by the 1967 biographical film of the criminal couple. Georgie Fame's performance has some vaudevillian influences, and it's odd how this seems to be played almost for laughs despite the serious subject matter. Still, it has a cheesy charm to it without going overboard with novelty elements, and Georgie Fame keeps his retelling within the realm of a likeable narrator.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

 

1976. "Theme from Mahogany (Do You Know Where You're Going To)"

Diana Ross

{US0387/-}

 

Diana Ross is a pop soul diva who not only marked the days of Motown with her famed girl band the Surpremes, releasing numerous masterpieces, but also had a decades-long fairly successful solo career.

 

 

"Theme From Mahogany (Do You Know Where You're Going To?)" isn't the most memorable piece in her extensive repertoire. But it's still a decent ballad, intended as a soundtrack song for some romantic film directed by the famed owner of Motown himself, Berry Gordy, which I didn't know before (I mean the movie was a big flop, which is probably why). The arrangements are rich and lush, but the overall impact is pretty serene. Diana Ross gently chants about love regrets throughout the song unbotheredly. It's not memorable in any way, but it's still sweet song enough.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1987. "Jack Your Body"

Steve "Silk" Hurley

{-/UK0583}

 

 

"Jack Your Body" is a pretty impressive piece of early house music. In fact, it's a historically significant song since it was the first full-on house song to top the two charts, signaling the start of the era of electronic dance music domination. After the demise of disco in the late '70s, DJs in Chicago quickly created dizzying sounds to get the dancefloor going by utilizing newfangled synthesizer technology. House music was one of the very first substyles to emerge from this, was still being conceptually similar to disco with its "4-on-flour" rhythmed beats but with a much more updated electronic sound obviously. House quickly spread in nightclubs across the United States in the '80s, and it also managed to gain traction in the UK. The latter of which was particularly marked by the rise of acid house and its associated drug culture in late-'80s raves.

 

There's no denying that "Jack Your Body" is an endlessly catchy song. It has a memorable bassline and some enjoyable snare drums. It's a great groove for dance clubs that stays away from the complicated and is all about having mindless fun. Not my favorite house song ever per se, but I admire it for introducing a whole new subculture to the mainstream and how much it influenced music for years to come, with many of my favorites being more or less connected to this.

 

Note that that there are multiple mixes of this song, such as the long "12 version (which I think is what topped the UK chart), but that version was primarily intended for dancefloors, so I only listened to the version featured in the video clip.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1987. "At This Moment"

Billy Vera and the Beaters

{US0619/-}

 

 

This is a bit of a strange hit. It was originally released all the way back in 1981, but initially completely went unnoticed. 5 years later, it was featured on a certain scene of an episode of the American TV show Family Ties and it suddenly picked up steam as a single all the way to top the charts. Maybe the American public in 1987 were starting to get tired of the big gated drum sound that was widespread, and needed a bit of a break in the form of more organic and simple soft rock song from the early '80s.

 

But anyway, this is actually fairly pleasant as far as cheesy soft rock love songs go. Bill Vera does a fairly job at singing, mostly with some restrain for most of it but can hit the powerful notes on the chorus. It's also perfectly finely composed with a nice sax being dolled out at parts. It's not too corny nor too boring.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1998. "All Around the World"

Oasis

{-/UK0781}

 

It's Oasis! One of the main bands of the britpop movement, an alt rock movement that was sort of a reaction to the rougher American styles like grunge and looked back on the melodicity and simplicity of '60s rock instead. Blur was probably my favorite Britpop band because of their more daring and exploratory sound. While I'm not the biggest fan of Liam Gallagher as a vocalist, I will admit that the band produced many masterpieces.

 

 

I'm torn about "All Around the World," one of their more contentious songs among their fans. It was part of their Be Here Now album cycle, an album that is still debated today as to whether it is a masterpiece worthy of the band's previous material or overproduced grand rubbish. I wouldn't go that far, because this song still has a lot of good qualities. I like the free, liberating lyrics, and the guitar work is flawless throughout, provided by Liam's talented brother Noel Gallagher. I appreciate the daring structuring at work here, but this song tries too hard. It's 9 minutes long, making it the UK's longest number one hit along the way.

 

That wouldn't be a problem on its own, but there are far too many key changes and far too much going on in terms of production. Normally, I enjoy dense productions, but all of those big orchestral touches are dizzying rather than positively contributing to the song.This whole thing tries to be a grand statement of a song composition in the vein of the Beatles' "Hey Jude," but that song mostly worked because of its otherwise likeable simplicity and basic songwriting. Still, this is a beautifully crafted song, just not that well put together, and I enjoy it in many parts even if others aren't so great. As a result, I'll be generous with my rating.

 

Rating: 7/10

Listening to 'At This Moment' now...I thought I'd at least heard of all the 80s US #1s but that one doesn't ring a bell at all!

 

I love that random TV usage of a song leading to #1 on the charts is something that spans multiple generations now - Stranger Things in 2022, Family Ties in 1987, and even earlier examples I'm sure.

January 25th

 

Today we celebrate the 42nd birthday of Alicia Keys!

Happy birthday!

 

1957. "The Garden of Eden"

Frankie Vaughan

{-/UK0055}

 

 

A slice of biblically inspired pop. It's a jazzy tune that's fairly upbeat. Having said that, it's written in a very tiring staccato rhythm throughout. I also didn't like Frankie Vaughan's singing; it's technically impressive but his oversinging suffocates the whole thing. Might have been a number one song at some point, but it definitely went down as a footnote of a song at this point.

 

Rating: 4/10

 

--

 

1975. "Ms Grace"

The Tymes

{-/UK0364}

 

It's not everyday that we have a soul song by an American R&B group on our hands that was a huge hit in the UK but completely bombed in the US. The Tymes even had a Billboard Hot 100 number 1 hit a decade prior to this, so it's not like they were unknown there, so I wonder why such a disparacy in popularity there.

 

 

That being said, I prefer this to their other hit on this project. No matter how shoddily written it is, I don't think it's physically possible for me to dislike this type of euphoric soul. It captures the richness and denseness of philly soul very well, while also wondefully putting it through a poppy setting. The lyrics are nothing impressive, some observations of a pretty lady the narrator has a crush on, but that literally doesn't matter when the Tymes sing this with so much conviction and vocal dexterity.

 

I wasn't aware of this song prior to this project, so this is definitely a very nice find!

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1975. "Please Mr. Postman"

The Carpenters

{US0351/-}

 

 

What an absolute bummer. I personally like the Carpenters. They were always sort of looked down by classic rock purists as disposible easy listening music, but I personally think they made some very well crafted and beautifully arranged pop rock.

 

But even I can't possibly defend this absolute abberation. "Please Mr. Postman" was a landmark single for the American music landscape as it was the first song by Motown, the first black-owned label, to top the Billboard Hot 100, a cultural marker in an era dominated by social unrest. So to see this particular song being stripped of all its soul and watered down to please the most whitebread of radio programmers feels like an insult to music itself. I'm not sure if Karen Carpenters had a cold or was completely exhausted while recording this, but she sounds truly horrendous on it. Her tone is consistently flat, and her notes are sung very nasally. The dinky harmonies feel downright embarassing. The music is pure radio fodder, and it turns into bland summer camp rock near the end. The entire thing might as well be a dumb ad jingle, which is appropriate given that its "videoclip" is basically an ad for Disneyland.

 

This song is so culturally and musically repugnant that even a 1/10 feels generous, so I've created a special type of notation to highlight how incredibly detestable certain songs can be:

 

Rating: MAJOR FLOP

 

It might have been a number 1 hit, but it will always be a flop in my eyes.

 

--

 

1986. "The Sun Always Shines on T.V."

a-ha

{-/UK0564}

 

A-ha might as well be a one-hit wonder at this point considering how much "Take on Me" strongly outshines the rest of their catalogue in popularity. It's a bummer because they're a very solid synthpop group that had many other bangers.

 

 

"The Sun Always Shines on T.V." is extremely overproduced and dense, but in the best possible way. It has a gorgeous melody, which soars into bliss with the chorus. Morten Harket truly has the vocal chops of an angel, and he shows them off wonderfully on this song. That "Touch me!" could melt even the hardest of hearts. And, despite being primarily a melodic love song, it also bangs with synths and drums, elevating the sound to an exhilaratingly catchy one.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1992. "Goodnight Girl"

Wet Wet Wet

{-/UK0673}

 

 

What an absolute misuse of harmonies. Soul bands like the Tymes who could actually layer their vocals properly to create a rich ensemble would give Wet Wet Wet a run for their money. And other than the vocals, there's nothing to hold on to. Those lyrics full of ridiculous hyperboles certainly are nothing to write home about.  Everything is just disjointed and bland, and listening to it is even a chore. Marti Pellow isn't a bad singer at all, but Wet Wet Wet could definitely pride themselves as a better band than they actually were.

 

Rating: 4/10

 

--

 

1992. "All 4 Love"

Color Me Badd

{US0763/-}

 

"All 4 Love" from 1992, not to be confused with "All for Love" from 1994 we had a few days ago.

 

 

I don't like Color Me Badd, they mostly made annoying and tacky songs despite their very short tenure at success in the early '90s. "All 4 Love" is thankfully a innocent little new jack swing love jam I have nothing really against. It's definitely very juvenile, down to the vocals sounding more like a teen sung them than a grown adult, but it's mostly in an endearingly cute way. Altough the funky beat is truly what saved this song. There's a pretty poor attempt at '70s smooth soul slow talking at some point that Boyz-II-Men possibly made cool again in R&B of the time. And while I like it, I'm definitely in no hurry to listen to it again.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1997. "Your Woman"

White Town

{-/UK0757}

 

 

"Your Woman" is certainly an odd little pop song experiment. A psychedelic swirl of a dancebeat guided by the faint echoed vocals of British-Indian singer Jyoti Mishra, with a fairly muted and contemplative approach. It cleverly samples Lew Stone's "My Woman" from the '30s, giving the composition a haunting quality. The lyrics are uniquely genderbent, depicting a violent and dark romantic situation (not to mention all the LGBT coding that you could assign to this). Sometimes Jyoti's vocals sound so beaten down that they sound like genuine calls for help. Sometimes the synth stabs get really heavy, and it turns into this twisted rave nugget. This is a truly unique and amazing song.

 

Rating: 9/10

 

--

 

2003. "Stop Living the Lie"

David Sneddon

{-/UK0947}

 

 

David Sneddon was apparently the winner of a BBC singing competition I'd never heard of, but by that point so many channels were trying to ride the coattails of the succes of Pop Idol that it didn't really matter. Technically, this isn't a corronation single because it was released a little too late for that, but it might as well be. It's at least a little better than one would expect from that usually. It has some nice restraint and the respectable craft into the arrangements, rather than feeling forced and bombastically cheesy. The singing is measured, but perhaps a little too overly so to the point of blandness. There isn't much personality expressed here.

 

In general, I don't find this song particularly compelling. It's beautiful and well-made, but it's also forgettable and a little boring.

 

Rating: 5/10

 

--

 

2018. "River"

Eminem ft. Ed Sheeran

{-/UK1333}

 

 

2018 was a bad time to be a fan of Eminem. His Revival album was ripped to shreds by the critics, attention-mongering actions like being anti-mumble rap and his embarassing feud with Machine Gun Kelly was his bread and butter, and in general he seemed to really push into dad-tryna-be-cool-with-the-kids territory. What an absolute shitshow that was, and this song might be a prefect representation of that shitshow. It's tedious and annoying, with Eminem on autopilot and a horribly forced Ed Sheeran hook. There's none of the clever underlying cynism that distinguished great songs like "Stan," instead we get this strange pop song about a serious abusive relationship while also attempting to be a lighthearted catchy pop song.

 

Long gone are the days of his visceral sarcasm and self-deprecating persona, instead we have a self-serious Eminem just not knowing what the hell he's doing.

 

Rating: 3/10

Edited January 25, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

January 26th

 

Today we celebrate the 59th birthday of Wendy Melvoin from Prince and the Revolution and the 60th birthday of Andrew Ridgeley, the former Wham! member!

Happy birthdays!

 

1963. "Walk Right In"

The Rooftop Singers

{US0084/-}

 

 

One of the most acclaimed music movements of the '60s might be the Greenwich Village folk revival scene. That's where artists like Bob Dylan and Paul Simon originated from. "Walk Right In" kinds of feels like a tease to that folk revival sound. It features some pleasing guitar strumming interplay, as well as some lovely singing. Both of which unfortunately go to waste due to the song's repetitiveness and disposable nature. This had a lot of potential to be fantastic!

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1974. "Tiger Feet"

Mud

{-/UK0343}

 

By 1974, glam rock had utterly dominate the UK single charts, being a mix of '50s-inspired rock 'n' roll riffs, poppy choruses, and a sense of outgoing flamboyance.

 

 

"Tiger Feet" might be considered the genre's poster child. Possibly the most generic song in that style, checking all the boxes without adding anything new or exciting. It's decently tuneful and has an alright hook. But the composition is very basic and barebones, and it's not catchy enough to warrant being so repetitive. And that guitar work would have made endlessly laughed at by rock 'n' roll legends of the '50s.

 

Thankfully, acts like Sweet, David Bowie, and Queen would come along and take the genre in new and exciting directions.

 

Rating: 5/10

 

--

 

1974. "You're Sixteen"

Ringo Starr

{US0316/-}

 

One of the worst rock movements ever? Songs about being horny for an underaged girl. There were an alarming number of them that clogged the charts between the '50s and the '70s. Of course, only a few of them were even remotely decent, let alone not feeling totally creepy and gross.

 

 

So, what compelled Ringo Starr to record a cover of a deeply shitty early '60s song? It's not even performed well. Ringo here sounds completely bored out of his mind. At least the Johnny Burnette version had a little zip to it. The music is that weird '70s radio-ready pop rocky soup that sounds desperately generic. Everything just mushes together, and nothing is likeable or fun.

 

Ringo, unlike his old ex-Beatles peers, has never had much of an interesting solo career of his own, despite a few good tracks here and there, and when he puts out garbage like this, you quickly understand why.

 

Rating: 3/10

 

--

 

1991. "Innuendo"

Queen

{-/UK0658}

 

Ans speaking of which here's Queen, the band that everybody seems to love! 1991 was the unfortunate where the band's legendary singer, Freddie Mercury, sadly succombed to an HIV-related infection. Yet at the beginning of the year, Queen did the incredible feat of the UK singles chart after almost a decade of not doing.

 

 

"Innuendo" is a grandiose artistic statement in the same way that "Bohemian Rhapsody" was. Sonically, the track constantly reinvents itself, whether it's the towering power belter at the start, the flamenco guitar interlude, or the movingly sweet middle section. Nonetheless, the song maintains its consistent theme of moving forward in the face of injustice all the way through (unless there's actually an innuendo to something else entirely?). Brian May, the guitarist, is on top form here, providing us with some absolutely fantastic guitar work. Those shredding riffs at the start, combined with a surprising synthesizer, are truly the very definition of epic. And, of course, there's Freddie Mercury, displaying his great sense of operatic showmanship once more.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1991. "The First Time"

Surface

{US0738/-}

 

 

Bah! Just more schmaltzy adult contemporary mush with uncomfortably whiny vocals. The lyrics are ridiculously sappy (Why would you cry from looking into someone's eyes for the first time? Isn't that just making a bad first impression?). And it just goes on and on too, uninterupted in its dullness, with the exception of one horrifyingly horrible moment. That synthetically processed guitar "solo" near the end is literally nails on a chalkboard level of painful to hear. At least there's something to keep you from falling asleep?

 

This somehow managed to top the R&B charts even though it sounds like pretty much any ballad from the time. Just not good at all.

 

Rating: 3/10

 

--

 

2023. "Flower"

Miley Cyrus

{US1145/UK1408}

 

Miley certainly started off this year with a bang.

 

 

One thing that stands out to me is that her voice has definitely become huskier over the years. It works wonders when she belts catchy rockers, as evidenced by the great throwback song "Midnight Sky," but it works less well in this type of more midtempo dance-pop setting. But she does get to show off her delectably raspy growls at times. The beat to "Flower" isn't particularly exciting, with only faint hints of disco being presented (the strings sound very pretty, but they almost seem wandering aimlessly in the mix). The lyrics are a little strange in that it almost feels like she would rather wallow in her loneliness, almost as if she had no one else in her life but him. I would have applauded the message of moving on from someone in a catchy format, but it doesn't work particularly well here.

 

At the very least, it's a good song, if perhaps a little understated.

 

Rating: 7/10

Edited January 27, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

The chorus and vocal style of Surface - The First Time reminds me of 'Scritti Politti - The Word Girl' from a few years earlier but that song was better imo.

 

White Town - Your Woman reminds of Space - Female of the Species - another very good muted vocal song from the late 90s.

 

'Innuendo' is a very good song too.

Edited January 26, 20232 yr by TheSnake

January 27th

 

Today we celebrate the 79th birthday of Nick Mason from Pink Floyd and the 51st birthday of Mark Owen from Take That!

Happy birthdays!

 

1962. "Peppermint Twist"

Joey Dee and the Starliters

{US0064/-}

 

In 1962 Chubby Checker's "The Twist" did the incredible feat of topping the Hot 100 chart for a second time after almost two years, and this without any holidays push! Allowing it to be the biggest song on that charts undisputably for 60 long years.

 

 

So of course in face of such massive succes, copycats had to come to rake up some of that sweet momentum. "Peppermint Twist" doesn't even try to hide it's a shameless rip-off, but it's also a very inferior version. The beat is way less compelling, with that sax playing being downright pathetic. Joey Dee doesn't pocess nowhere near the presence and the charm inviting you to dance the same way the warm voice of Chubby did. He straightup reminds of a school dance counseler in how little enthusiasm there seems to be shown here. A bad copy that got forgotten in the shadow of the original.

 

Rating: 4/10

 

--

 

1966. "Michelle"

The Overlanders

{-/UK0209}

 

 

I personally find this pretty forgettable and poorly sung. I didn't even realize this was a Beatles cover. It sure isn't a memorable track of theirs. The original was cute, but nothing too great about it, especially compared to the pop classics they were churning out at the time. It just feels like a throwaway single to gain some more music markets in the pocket. So when a much worse band covers already subpar material, there was pretty much no chance for this to be elevated. The mellow aucoustic instrumentation and harmonics are kind of pleasing at the very least.

 

Rating: 5/10

 

--

 

1973. "Blockbuster"

Sweet

{-/UK0325}

 

I love Sweet, one of the best and fairly underappreciated bubblegum bands of the '70s. They had the flamboyance of glam rock down to a science, but weaponised it to a fantastic degree in their truly mindlessly fun and weird little pop compositions. "Fox on the Run" and "Ballroom Blitz" are both amazing songs of their which unfortunately won't appear on here.

 

 

"Blockbuster" is a lot of fun still, even if it's not a favorite of mine. It's not the most memorable of hooks, but it sure got one. The sung glistens into a bombastic blur of vocal sirens, and then explodes even further with an absolute storming chorus. It's got the goofy theatricality and grandiose musicmanship that makes Sweet such a good band, it's just not at its most accomplished here.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1973. "Superstition"

Stevie Wonder

{US0288/-}

 

 

Do I really need to point out how great "Superstition" truly is? I think that fantastically funky bassline alone speaks for itself. It might possibly be one of the grooviest songs put to disk yet; The lyrics on the other hand aren't actually anything exceptional, just a bunch of observations on superstitious people. But Stevie Wonder manage to transform that fairly mundane topic into a towering epic. The moment where the brass isntruments come in and he elevates his voice is truly chillingly great. I have no idea how he managed to compose a song that sounds both triumphant and sort of sombre in a way, but he truly succeeded and even excelled here.

 

Rating: 9/10

 

--

 

1979. "Hit Me with Your Rhythm Stick"

Ian Dury and the Blockheads

{-/UK0432}

 

 

And here's a hit song that managed to mariage both the goofiness of Sweet with the adventurous funkiness of Stevie Wonder, and absolutely succeeds at it in the process. Ian Dury is totally ridiculous on this, being more of a cartoon character putting out a show rather than a proper singer. Yet it works so well when the music is so unhinged. The composition just doesn't try to make sense, it just wants to have fun and throws everything in the mix in order to do. The synths go absolutely insane especially while the sax part is pretty much taken from avant-garde jazz, and I wouldn't have asked for less. That last part goes absolutely hard. An absolutely amazing slice of delirious disco.

 

Rating: 9/10

 

--

 

1990. "Tears on My Pillow"

Kylie Minogue

{-/UK0640}

 

 

I don't think I'm shocking any Kylie Minogue fan too much when I say I'm not the biggest fan of her earlier stuff produced by the Stock Aitken Waterman team. "Tears of My Pillow" is a mediocre cover of a fairly good song but ultimately too drippy for me. I guess it's nice that they kept the doo-wop style beat. But even then, this was too overproduced in bland, wishy-washy way. Kylie sings pretty mediocrily and unconvingly here. It sounds more like a demo tape that some teen submitted to a singing competition show. It doesn't help that they completely botched her voice here with some fairly horrible sounding reverb processing on her vocals.

 

I dunno, there's just very little for me to like here. Sorry, Kylie!

 

Rating: 3/10

 

--

 

1996. "Spaceman"

Babylon Zoo

{-/UK0733}

 

What an odd little song to go to number 1! Of course it's mostly thanks to the combination of the novelty factor of that pitch shifted intro and it being in a Levi's commercials (who could have though that commercials for a jeans company could have such a strong chokehold on music charts) that it gained such traction. But it's still went up to become one of the fastest and best sold singles in the UK to this day and was a major success too elsewhere in Europe. Very impressive for such an inconvenial song.

 

 

"Spaceman" is a fairly strange intergalactic experiment in the realm of alternative. It kind of ties to go for an industrial sound like Skinny Puppy or Front 242, altough it's not as gritty and cathartic. It's still got some fairly dark subjects handled, like the undercurrent anti-religion theme being expressed. The outlandish bells and whsitles this rock song got don't work all that well in combination with the heavy subject matter, but it sure is interesting.

 

Overall, it's fairly good, just a little bogged down by the singer's exaggerated whine that was a super common trope in '90s alt rock for some reason.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

2001. "Rollin'"

Limp Bizkit

{-/UK0889}

 

Nu-metal was one the more questionable trends of the early '00s. A mixture of metal and hip hop, it was contested by both metal purists and respectable music critics. It's pretty much only acceptable to listen to in a moshpit. I definitely don't like most of the genre, but it had some pretty good singles here and there, and bands like Linkin Park truly excelled despite the style.

 

 

"Rollin'" is a very dumb song, but by Limp Bizkit's standards, one of the worst bands of the late '90s, it's actually pretty good. It's not too spoiled by Fred Durst's obnoxious personality, even if I don't like how he keeps changing in his pitch. It's got a good rhythmic beat and some heavy guitar shreds that are used effectively. But there's otherwise not a whole lot of substance to this, and it eventually gets annoying in how repetitive it is. At least it's nowhere near as awful as some other Limp Bizkit songs.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

2007. "Grace Kelly"

Mika

{-/UK1050}

 

 

Sort of a revivalist attempt at glam rock but with a much poppier take on the sound. I'm not a fan of all the faux-Freddie Mercury impersonations going on here. The way it's done is just way too kitschy and not a good way. That being said, when the chorus soars into Mika's falsetto vocals it's pretty awesome. It's got a fun springy production style taking influences from one of my favorite genres, piano rock, being rich and sophisticated while keeping a melodious and fun sound. And while I'm not a fan of the impersonations, Mika's theatre kid persona is truly on full display here and sounds to have a blast, and it's enjoyable to hear as a result.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

2022. "We Don't Talk About Bruno"

Carolina Gaitán, Mauro Castillo, Adassa, Rhenzy Feliz, Diane Guerrero, Stephanie Beatriz and the Encanto cast

{US1133/UK1395}

 

That sure is a mouthful for a list of artists. Pretty much everyone knows at least a couple of Disney movie songs. They're so ubiquitous that most people would probably think of one if they were aksed to sing random songs on the spot. Yet historically very few of them truly managed to much of a chart success on the pop charts. "Encanto" didn't even seem like this giant towering megahit that takes pop culture by storm like "The Lion" King or "Frozen" did, but somehow one of its songs managed to trascend that and become a genuine chart monster. The streaming era truly allows for some wild things now.

 

 

I think the most notable thing about this song is that it was penned by Lin-Manuel Miranda, the famous composer of the critically acclaimed rapped Broadway production "Hamilton". And you can definitely tell, as "We Don't Talk About Bruno" is not your typical Disney fare. It's got a very contemporary muted beat that hints at Latin. Even without knowing anything about the movie you know it's damn catchy. It's also composed in a pretty interesting way where every character sort of sings in a different tone and style depending on their personality/powers. My favorite might be Dolores and her hushed section. The ending where all the characters singing sort of entangles into the main character's confused state is also fairly amazing. Who knew modern Disney could still deliver on the bangers.

 

Rating: 8/10

Edited January 27, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

January 28th

 

Today we celebrate the 45th birthday of Joey Fatone, a former member of NSYNC and the 43rd birthday of Nick Carter from NSYNC's fellow boy band, the Backstreet Boys!

Happy birthdays!

 

1965. "Go Now"

The Moody Blues

{-/UK0185}

 

The Moody Blues are a respected band for their pioneering work in the realm of progressive rock. They made some great classic albums in the '60s, and released fantastic songs like "Nights in White Satin" (if you haven't heard it yet, do yourself a favor, it's bone-chillingly beautiful!). But they started off as a very different band initially. Before a change in line up occured in 1966, the Moody Blues were a pretty typical pop rock band from Birmingham. They had Denny Laine as the main vocalist, who later became a prominent member of Wings with Paul McCartney.

 

 

"Go Now" is by far the biggest in the group's early era. While the band back then was definitely as interesting as their later incarnation, this is actually already pretty great. The music is definitely closer stylistically to soul music than to rock, but the band do a fantastic of layering their vocals appropriately. They perfectly capture the sad undertone needed to make such a sad and dramatic song work. I love the piano interlude, it softens the mood yet builds the rhythm toward the final verses very well. Denny Laine sounds definitely very young here, but he admittedly does the pathetic lover persona really well without overdoing it, and he has enough vocal talent to elevate his parts. Very good song!

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1984. "Relax"

Frankie Goes to Hollywood

{-/UK0531}

 

When Frankie Goes to Hollywood first arrived on the scene, they were exactly what the '80s needed. A sexually liberating and LGBT-friendly synthpop band releasing club-ready songs in an era that was particularly harsh for that aformentioned community. They certainly started off with a bang in that domain.

 

 

"Relax" has a fairly contradictory name in this case. It's anything but relaxing. It has pumping synth stabs, cheesy MIDI trumpets and dance beats that would make the most lethargic of people dance. Holly Johnson's vocals are appropriately flamboyant, and fantastically rules on the rhythm. The vocals are all very sexually charged. It truly stimulates the feeling of being trapped in a dingy sexclub and yet having the time of your life at the same time. Obviously in an era where the LGBT were mostly still rejected by pop culture, this got banned by the BBC and gathered a lot of controversy. And that controversy probably helped the song shot up in sales. Good thing because it's a great catchy tune of liberation!

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1989. "Something's Gotten Hold of My Heart"

Marc Almond ft. Gene Pitney

{-/UK0622}

 

 

The original Gene Pintey "Something's Gotten Hold of My Heart" version from the '60s is a great little nugget of orchestral pop with attractively sweet and approachable vocals. Unfortunately I find that this cover of Marc Almond, the ex-member of Soft Cell who apparently is a huge fan of bringing back not so well-so-remembered songs from the '60s back to life, botches the original charm of the song quite a bit. Sure, his singing is measured and technically more impressive than Gene Pintey's, but it doesn't quite translate well in relation to the song's emotion. It lacks the geniunety that made the original works so well. In fact, Gene Pintey's back on this version as well! And more power to him for rerecording this after all these years, but he also sounds like a shell of his former self unfortunately. At least they're sounding they're having a blast recording this together, and maybe someone might the kitsch charm of this version alluring. But it definitely doesn't do that much for me.

 

Rating: 5/10

 

--

 

1995. "Creep"

TLC

{US0794/-}

 

TLC were one of most legendary all-girl R&B groups of the '90s. They had style, flair, killer hooks and female empowering anthems for days.

 

 

"Creep" is a great showcase of what the trio is all about. Obviously that muted trumpet sample coupled with the funky beat is a truly fantastic combo. The lyrics are fairly bitter, where the narrator gets romantic revenge on their cheating lover. And T-Boz with her beaten down and almost deadpan tone truly captures that bitterness admirably well. The chorus then comes in and is delightfully catchy and bright in an deviously cheeky way, making the message clear that you shouldn't have messed with them! Truly a really cool song with attitude, and probably the best song named "Creep" from the '90s.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

2006. "When the Sun Goes Down"

Arctic Monkeys

{-/UK1026}

 

Arctic Monkeys are truly one of the first bands in the age of the internet. In the band's formative years, their debut album Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm No, nowadays considered an indie rock classic, gathered a strong following on the internet which helped them gaining a major push of momentum in the mid-'00s, which ended up dominating the British charts. That particular still is to this day one of the fastest selling albums in the UK history.

 

 

"When The Sun Goes Down" is truly one of the bleakest moments on that particular album. Depicting a dark situation of a woman being misuses and forced into the streets by her partner. This tone of the song is appropriately harsh, and Alex Turner does a job in his storytelling with how disarrayed yet at the same time stoic he sounds here, even if he certainly doesn't shy away from featuring his strong accent from Sheffield. The guitar work also works in tandem very well to paint the sad picture. I do think the chorus is a little underwhelming since it's not contributing to the song all that much, but otherwise this is pretty excellent indie rock stuff.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

2016. "Stitches"

Shawn Mendess

{-/UK1309}

 

Well, coincidentally here's another internet-made artist. This time it's Shawn Mendes, a Canadian kid who gained attention through video-sharing social media Vine (remember when that was a thing?).

 

 

Well, I can't certainly be too harsh on Shawn for how juvenile this sounds, he was still a teen when he recorded this after all. But that doesn't mean I can't still hate on it. His whiny vocals truly strain on the ears in the most unpleasant. I absolutely despise the way he sings "Stiiiitchhiiiuhhss" on the chorus. My eardrums truly are gonna need stitches after this! The song itself is bland heartbreak stuff that takes way too seriously and goes into absolutely ridiculous hyperboles. While the music has that stomping coffee shop sound that was huge in mid-'10s indie music, but feels pretty inappropriate in such a harsh song. That being said, this at least isn't anywhere near as horrendous as "Treat You Better", one of the worst songs of the '10s, but it still isn't very good at all.

 

Rating: 3/10

Edited January 30, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

January 29th

 

Today we celebrate the 67th birthday of Amii Stewart!

Happy birthday!

 

1960. "Starry Eyed"

Michael Holliday

{-/UK0095}

 

 

Not a fan of this. I guess the music has a nice samba-esque exotica flair to it that makes you think of vacation, but its song itself has thematically nothing to do with voyaging. It's just another sleepy ballad with shmaltzy lyrics. Michael Holliday is a terribly underwhelming vocalist that sounds anesthetized on this. There's no life or passion in his performance. He just sort of strums along the music blandly. The backing vocalists are at least a cute touch I suppose.

 

Rating: 4/10

 

--

 

1969. "Albatross"

Fleetwood Mac

{-/UK0264}

 

Many people nowadays seem to forget how longstanding Fleetwood Mac as a band actually is. They were putting out stuff and making hits way back in the late '60s, way before their famous "Dreams"/Rumours with Lindsey Buckingham and Stevie Nicks in the band.

 

 

In fact, "Albatross" here is the band's sole number one on the UK singles chart to date. It's a nice little instrumental song, very much in the style of the bluesy rock they were releasing at the time rather than the poppier soft rock they eventually were known for. This one instrumental is even a lot mellower than their vocal songs. It's moody and subdued in a very pleasing way, with guitar slicks slowly twanging and a fairly ominous sounding cymbals being clattered in the background. Very relaxing stuff!

 

While I certainly like this critically acclaimed single, I won't go as far as saying I adore it.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

1977. "Car Wash"

Rose Royce

{US0413/-}

 

 

Now this is some fun stuff! When those strings come in, you know exactly some groovy stuff is about to get down. Even though it's mostly a soundtrack song meant to set up the setting of the movie, the silly lyrics work great with the already mostly silly genre of disco. It's pure funky mindlessness meant as a quick pick-me-up, and it works great in that regard. Rose Royce were a soul band mostly only known for this one song in the US, which is a bummer because they really perform the hell of their stuff like here. But at least they seemed to have been much loved in the UK, considering they still had numerous top 10 hits after this.

 

I actually never heard of the movie Car Wash before, but it looks fun so I might give it a watch (but it's apparently directed by Joel Schumacher, the guy known for directing those horrible '90s Batman movies, so maybe not).

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

2000. "Born to Make You Happy"

Britney Spears

{-/UK0846}

 

When Britney Spears first arrived onto the pop scene, she was of course one of hottest teen pop idols on the airwaves singing mostly innocuous teenyboppers. Things certainly changed quite drastically as she grew up and reinvented herself as a more mature popstar!

 

 

"Born to Make You Happy" is a little slice of that bygone era. It's a pure product of the Max Martin formula of the time, even though this wasn't produced by him surprisingly. But it still is by someone by from the Cheiron studios, the same Swedish studio Max Martin worked at and where many of the popular teen pop songs of the time were composed. Those jumpy beats are a lot of fun, and I have a hard time disliking songs with such nice dense harmonies on the chorus. It's pure pop bliss. That being said, I do find Britney Spears pretty whiny sounding on this, which is only even more accentued by her Southern drawl. She's not the strongest when it comes to singing love songs, and this was definitely not her brightest moment. In fact, the whole song feels like it was first composed and sung as a ballad but was remixed at the last minute to a more upbeat song. The drippy lyrics kind of are a testament to that feeling. Weird

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

2000. "I Knew I Loved You"

Savage Garden

{US0852/-}

 

 

Argh... I said a few weeks ago that I liked "Truly, Madly Deeply" mostly for how much of a nicely composed song and driftingly sweet it was. But "I Knew I Loved You" tries way too hard and completely fails in what TMD was great at. For one thing, the music is completely generic sap that any boy band could have come up with. It's got all the bad traits of boring adult contempo mush. The lyrics are terribly forced. I do not find the "we didn't met yet, but I knew you were made for me" trope that so many love songs pull geniune at all. And this one truly basks in those clichés. And then there's Darren Hayes who does some terrible key changes and falsetto singing on this. None of this sounds good or is interesting in the slighest. Makes me actually shocked that this is from the same band that released "I Want You" a couple years before!

 

Rating: 3/10

 

--

 

2011. "Hold It Against Me"

Britney Spears

{US0998/-}

 

Hey, it's Britney again! This time much later into her career. By 2011, she certainly had lived through some tumultuous times, but she also piled on the hits in the process.

 

 

"Hold It Against Me" isn't exactly one of her most well-remembered songs. This time, it is actually produced by Max Martin. But pop music when this was released had already evolved quite significantly since 2000 and the Cheiron studio days. The beat on the verses is way too harsh in my opinion, it stabs your ears way too hard for it without really being catchy. It's essentially a love song in a dance club still, but a little more retain in that beat would have been nice. In fact, those verses sung in a weird triplet form aren't great honestly.The ethereal chorus on the other hand is very nice, and offers a needed break from all the harshness. I just wish more of the song was like that part. There's also glitchy middle drop with a lot of cut-up vocals near the end, very much inspired by the dubstep that was huge in the early '10s. I don't think true dubstep aficionados would find that part very well-done, but it's interesting at least.

Overall, it's a fine piece of club pop, but has a few clunky elements about it.

 

Rating: 6/10

Edited January 30, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

Happy to see: 'The Sun Always Shines On TV', 'Your Woman', 'Innuendo', 'Relax', 'We Don't Talk About Bruno' and 'When The Sun Goes Down' (the range!) achieving 8+ scores here :wub:

 

I'd have 'Albatross' right up there as well as it is my go-to relaxation song, its soothing powers are a thing of beauty.

I don't ever visit this part of the forum normally as I'm not into personal charts, but this is great. Good luck for the rest of it!

January 30th

 

Today we celebrate the 74th birthday of William King from the Commodores, the 72nd birthday of Phil Collins and the 39th birthday of Kid Cudi!

Happy birthdays!

 

1953. "Outside of Heaven"

Eddie Fisher

{-/UK0004}

 

 

A heavily orchestrated ballad with waltzy rhythms and quasi operatic vocals. The arrangements are very sophisticated and overly polished. The lyrics are all about a romantic yearning for some Spanish lady.

I didn’t really liked this…

 

Rating: 3/10

 

--

 

1959. "One Night" / "I Got Stung"

Elvis Presley

{-/UK0080}

 

 

"One Night" is the unfortunate result of taking an R&B song about the harsh reality of everyday life among minorities, and cleaning it up dry for white bread audiences. In this case the original Smiley Lewis version tackles the theme of debauchery and having intercourses with ladies of the street and the resulting shame. The Elvis version is a mere little love song instead. I mean it’s technically good, as the King tends to be vocally. And it’s also a nice break of all the fast-paced he was putting out at the time. It still doesn’t really the New Orleans, and is in general a fairly questionable cover version.

 

 

That's more like it! "I Got Stung" is a really fun stomper of a song with some amazing piano thumping at work here. I love how Elvis sings this in a ridiculously fast and uninterrupted way, riding off the beat with grace, passion and energy. A great Elvis classic!

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

1961. "Will You Love Me Tomorrow"

The Shirelles

{US0044/-}

 

 

"Will You Love Me Tomorrow" is a sweet little song about doubts and uncertainties in relationships, a theme not often explored in love songs but is a very real fact of life. And besides being lyrically interesting, it’s also very well sung where the vocals approximate soul music (the Shirelles might also be the very first all-girl group to ever top the Billboard Hot 100). The orchestration is also sublime, with the strings enriching wonderfully the pop instrumentation. It’s great!

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1964. "Needles and Pins"

The Searchers

{-/UK0162}

 

 

"Needles and Pins" possesses nice jangly tone to the guitar, a sound that the alternative scene of the '80s would later claim and pretty much perfect in several fantastic jangle pop releases. The vocal work here is fairly weak in my opinion. A lot of British Invasion were all about the hooks rather the vocal prowess, but I definitely the weak amateurish vocals actively hurt what could have been a pretty damn good love song. Even if the lyrics are pretty corny when you read into them, even for the mid-'60s.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1982. "Oh Julie"

Shakin' Stevens

{-/UK0493}

 

People were getting nostalgic for the pre-Sexual Revolution era in the '80s. That's how a hack like Shakin' Stevens winds up becoming the best selling singles artist of the decade, by selling retro-minded drivel.

 

 

"Tacky" is the only word that comes to mind when listening to this. It tries to be all quirky and kitschy, but fails to stay likeable or remotely even sounding good in the process. 50's rock 'n' roll had a bit of resurgence in the early '80s in general, and while bands like The Stray Cats managed to succesfully recapture the feel of ol' early rock music while putting out great music in the procress, this is definitely not one of those cases. Shakin' Stevens makes painful attempts at rockabilly singing in the same rock legends like Elvis above on "I Got Stung", and it's quite the chore to listen to. But worst of all is the accordion which I do like the inclusion on here at all. It does go well with the rest of the stock-sounding rock 'n' roll, and just gives the whole thing an unwelcome schlager feel.

Just unbearable.

 

Rating: 3/10

 

--

 

1982. "I Can't Go for That (No Can Do)"

Daryl Hall and John Oates

{US0512/-}

 

Daryl Hall and John Oates are one of these music duos I dunno what to do with. I do not like their personas nor can I stomach their vocals in many cases, but at the same time they made some absolutely amazing music which is hard to argue with.

 

 

"I Can't Go for That (No Can Do)" is one of moments of pure brilliance. The silky keyboard notes and twinkling production are some of the best musical works of that weird transitional period that was the early '80s. It's incredibly smooth and while at the same time rhythmic enough for the song to get not forgettable. Daryl Hall's vocals slightly teeter on the edge of being annoying for me, but the groove is so delectable and enchanting that it can easily excuse any vocal deficiency. And the lyrics are also pretty interesting, as that they depict a scene of romantic or even sexual resistance in a teasing way. It's just fun!

 

A mesmerizingly great single.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1988. "Need You Tonight"

INXS

{US0650/-}

 

The American charts were almost completely devoid of fun funky new wave songs by 1988, pushed to the wayside in favor of sleepy adult contemporary and by-the-number corporate rock by then. So it's nice to see an Australian band topping them with material that sounds like a throwback to the earlier part of the '80s.

 

 

One thing that is immediately noticeable is how cavernously minimalistic "Need You Tonight" is. It's got a biting riff line, a muted sound and a groovy bassline, setting up a fantastically lowkey and understated mood. Which is on what Michael Hutchence flirtingly sings in an almost whispery tone to succesfully create a sexual tension of a song. A song that both truly enchants and makes you want to dance, managing with that a ton of musical restraint too. Simply spectacular.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1999. "Pretty Fly (for a White Guy)"

The Offspring

{-/UK0813}

 

Irony and MTV-ready pop punk both certainly were all the rage in the late '90s, and the combination of the

 

 

"Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)" can be given the benefit of the doubt for at least trying to satirize that suburban white trash type that tries too hard to appriopriate hip hop culture just for their own sake. The song sure plays a lot into the character for the laughs, but I wonder if the meaning got lost on some people and this was taken as an actual geniune anthem for that attitude instead. The song sure does feel like it's losing its point at parts too though, which probably didn't help. Whatever the case is, this song gets also fairly annoying. I do not like how Dexter Holland's literally shout at parts. Bands like Green Day pretty much perfected the pop punk yelling but in a catchy, on tune manner, but here it goes all out pretty obnoxiously and needlessly so. I also don't get the "Give it to me baby!" part sung by uncredited female vocalists. I mean they're pretty fun at first. But it's rapidly not fun at all after that.

 

It's a good song if you just turn your brain off, but it does have some grating elements.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1999. "...Baby One More Time"

Britney Spears

{US0838/UK0817}

 

And Britney is back once again! That's a lot of Britney in two days. January sure was a good month for her. And this time, it's actually her very her first single that we're graced with.

 

 

This was rightfully a cultural smash from the get-go. It's pretty much the early Max Martin machine at its peak: highly melodic, funky beats that are quite reminiscent of new jack swing of the early '90s, and those amazing distorted piano stabs. That dense chorus where him and Britney sing in unison is truly magical. I did mention how Britney Spears' Southern drawl and her nasal singing voice did hinder some of her ballads, but those work great in context of this song with some amazing groove. There's an already impressive showcase of confidence here for a 16 year old (even if it does she does seem to be sexualized at some shots of the video clip). But besides some questionable, it's just an amazing little burst of joyous pop goodness. Definitely deserving its status of a pop classic at this point.

 

Rating: 9/10

 

--

 

2020. "Godzilla"

Eminem ft. Juice Wrld

{-/UK1363}

 

 

Well, at least it's nowhere near bad as "River". You might as well say that this was a solid attempt at bringing back some of early charm from his early Slim Shady days. Here he takes himself way less seriously and just want to have fun. Pretty impressive showcase of his rapping skills and how many bars he can spit in seconds time. Pretty sure this song now has the world record for fastest rapping, but it's not something that ever appealed to me nor is that part very interesting to listen to. Just feels more like a novelty factor more than anything. The production is also not very good, feeling quite dated for the year 2020.

 

This song also has the sad context of being the very last thing that Juice Wrld recorded before his shockingly early demise. And while I like that chorus, it's oddly sad (and not just because of the context) in contrast to Eminem's goofy verses. At least Eminem seemed to have stopped his patronizing attitude towards younger rappers.

 

Pretty ok song overall.

 

Rating: 5/10

Edited January 30, 20232 yr by Telsorrow

January 31st

 

And we've finally reached the end of the month!

Today we're also celebrating the 72nd birthday of KC from KC and the Sunshine Band, and the 42nd birthday of Justin Timberlake!

Happy birthdays!

 

1963. "Diamonds"

Jet Harris and Tony Meehan

{-/UK0146}

 

 

Pretty decent surf rock instrumental. I like the little vocal that occasionally. I did wish they had more of a presence throughout the song though. The melody kind of feels like intro to Hawaii Five-O oddly enough, which wouldn’t debut for another 5 years.

 

Otherwise nothing really noteworthy, it's decently composed and played I suppose.

 

Rating: 6/10

 

--

 

1968. "Everlasting Love"

Love Affair

{-/UK0243}

 

 

There are dozens of versions of "Everlasting Love" that exists throughout the decades at this point. It was originally an American soul song that a year later was covered by a short-lived London rock band to number 1 on the UK singles chart. And as sweet as that original version of Robert Knight is, I actually prefer this cover over it which may be the definite version of the song.

 

Steve Ellis' vocals are definitely not on par with Robert Knight's, but I think the amateurishness works in this case very well with song's theme of desperation in love. It highlights the feeling of yearning for someone's heart in a more convincing way. But most importantly I truly love the instrumentation. Those big horns that blare on truly are fantastic. The whole song is layered and bombastic in such an enjoyable way. Instrumentally it's fairly inspired by the pop soul that was big at the time in the US, but also has a nice British Invasion rock sheen added to it as well.

 

Very good!

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1970. "Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes)"

Edison Lighthouse

{-/UK0281}

 

 

Some delightful bubblegum stuff. Bubblegum pop is at its best when the lyrics are kept twee and wistful without being polluted by novelty elements like a certain “twice on the pipe” line. The music is bright, overblown and maximalist in the all the ways I love this kind of music to be. The vocals are lovely, and especially love it when the group chants in unison on the chorus. They truly sounds to have a lot of fun.

 

Truly a song to put you in a good mood.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1970. "I Want You Back"

The Jackson 5

{US0228/-}

 

It's Michael Jackson again, this time the kid version accompanied by his siblings in his legendary band! Sure they were hold with an iron hand by their father manager, but they also delivered on the sweet jams.

 

 

"I Want You Back" is in fact their very first big hit, and it's even more bubblegum goodness. For a song made by a kiddie band, this sure is ridiculously some impressive stuff for the age of the performers. It truly sounds like a song that any other Motown band could have released, and it doesn't even seem to have been dumbed down to accommodate it to the performers' age either. The fact that it sung by kids actually adds another layer of innocence to an already charmingly sweet love song.

 

Michael truly seems like a natural born for the performance, as he truly delivered on this and it might be why he’s already center stage on the song. His voice hasn’t cracked yet that he does really impressive vocal runs, especially on that final section.

 

"I Want You Back" might possibly be the best pop song sung the kids, and the competition isn’t exactly the brightest stuff anyway.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1976. "Mamma Mia"

ABBA

{-/UK0383}

 

It's ABBA! A Swedish pop quatuor that is easily the biggest act to come out of the entire Eurovision Song Contest, as well as one of the best.

 

 

"Mammia Mia" is a nice slice of europop about the narrator being cheated on by their lover and yet back-and-forth on them. Musically, it's ABBA so it is impeccably produced pretty much by default. I love the use of the jumpy piano keys and guitar work on here. And then there's that chorus part being so much minimalistic instrumentally to the rest of the song, but the verses come in almost explosive way. Some truly great compositional craft is going on here.

 

While this is a still a very good song overall and has to the fun legacy of having a musical (and its movie adaptation) named after it, it's definitely no match to the gloriously fanastic "SOS" from the same album (a real bummer that is nowhere near as popular as their hits).

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

1976. "Love Rollercoaster"

Ohio Players

{US0388/-}

 

Ohio Players might possibly be one of the best funk of all-time, and later hip hop artists sure do love them apparently considering the incredible amount of times their songs got sampled.

 

 

"Love Rollercoaster" starts off with a particularly great guitar riff. And then the groove settles in and then it's pretty much 4 minutes of pure funk silliness (or 7 if you listen to the extended 12" version). It's pretty one long jam session where the whole band goes all out. I particulatly love the bass play in this song, and how the instruments sort of swirl with the vocals near the end. It's easily my favprite part of the song. That being I do find this a little too repetitive and it does goes pretty aimless for a while. Still, a very solid song.

 

There's also a persistent urban legend around the scream that you can hear around the 2:30 mark where it could have been a woman being murdered in the studio while this was being recorded. It has since been debunked, so it's pretty ominous to hear it and think about it.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

1998. "You Make Me Wanna"

Usher

{-/UK0782}

 

And it's with his pretty young self we're introduced to Usher on this project! I really like Usher, as a R&B artist, he sure got charisma and smoothness in the pocket.

 

 

"You Make Me Wanna..." is one fine late '90s R&B jam. It's got all the Usher tropes already in place, lyrically being it's anxious look into a guy's relationship with his girlfriend while also involving a lot of smooth sex talk. It's pretty much an artform that Usher would perfect over the years. And while I like it here already, I do find the hook a bit forgetable. One thing that this song got right though is the production, featuring those lovely shuffling beats that were very in style back then and some gorgeous flamenco guitar sliding occasially.

 

Rating: 7/10

 

--

 

1998. "Together Again"

Janet

{US0823/-}

 

 

"Together Again" is truly an incredibly sweet song, with a gorgeous melody that the Supremes could have sung, and a hopeful message on loss. It's all effortlessly exported by the charming Janet. House music wasn't doing a particularly great on the American charts in 1998, so for an R&B artist to release a straight up house song at the time sure was a bold decision. I admire the decision to explore, but I'm the actually the tiniest bit of bothered that the house beat is a bit on the boring side in comparison to pretty much everything else. But there still are some definite nice touches here and there production-wise. That sparkling flute sound that ocassionaly pops up is serotonin-inducing for instance.

 

Rating: 8/10

 

--

 

2019. "7 Rings"

Ariana Grande

{US1083/UK1350}

 

Ariana! The girl that starred in a bunch of Nickelodeon series, and went on to become a pop megastar while succesfully shedding her kiddie image.

 

 

Now for "7 Rings", the song gathered quite a bit of controversy for cultural appropriation of black culture. Since I'm no authority on that, I won't dwelve into that and focus on the music itself. And "7 Rings" sure is a weird beast of a song. Most notably, it interpolates "My Favorite Things" from The Sound of Music into a fully hedonistic ode to materialism. I'm usually no fan of blatant interpolations, but I guess it sort of works here in an ironic twisting way. Ariana is known for her melismatic singing, but here instead she raps instead. And it's surprisingly not terrible for the most part safe for the most part. The hook does come as tryhard though and gets irritating eventually. I actually think the dynamic and fun trap production might be my favorite part on this song if I'm being honest

 

Decent, but definitely not stuff I'm looking for when I want to listen to Ariana.

 

Rating: 6/10

'Everlasting Love' is my favourite of these recent ones you have posted.

 

'I Can't Go For That' is very good, Simply Red also used the sample very well in their song 'Sunrise'.

 

'Together Again' is a good house song with a sweet vocal as you say, similar in style to the house remix version of Janet's much earlier 90s duet with Luther Vandross 'Best Things In Life Are Free'

 

Yes the production of 'Godzilla' is a bit dated for 2020 being very DJ-Mustard in style, whose productions were most common in the UK chart from 2014-5. A good song anyway.

Edited January 31, 20232 yr by TheSnake

One month down, 11 to go! Here's a little recap of what went down this past month:

 

January Recap

 

Top 10 Songs

1. "The Sound of Silence" - Simon and Garfunkel (January 1st)

2. "Great Balls of Fire" - Jerry Lee Lewis (January 10th)

3. "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes" - The Platters (January 19th)

4. "Your Woman" - White Town (January 25th)

5. "I Wish" - Stevie Wonder (January 22nd)

6. "Sixteen Tons" - Tennessee Ernie Ford (January 20th)

7. "Downtown" - Petula Clark (January 23rd)

8. "Jesus to a Child" - George Michael (January 20th)

9. "El Paso" - Marty Robbins (January 4th)

10. "...Baby One More Time" - Britney Spears (January 30th)

 

Bottom 10 Songs

10. "I Write the Songs" - Barry Manilow (January 17th)

9. "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing (In Perfect Harmony)" - The New Seekers (January 8th)

8. "There! I've Said It Again" - Bobby Vinton (January 4th)

7. "Laffy Taffy" - D4L (January 14th)

6. "That's What Friends Are For" - Dionne & Friends (January 18th)

5. "A Little Bit More" - 911 (January 23rd)

4. "The Climb" - Joe McElderry (January 2nd)

3. "How Am I Supposed to Live Without You" - Michael Bolton (January 20th)

2. "Go Away Little Girl" - Steve Lawrence (January 12th)

1. "Please Mr. Postman" - The Carpenters (January 25th)

 

Average score per decade:

'50s average: 6.50/10

'60s average: 6.12/10

'70s average: 6.17/10

'80s average: 6.00/10

'90s average: 5.90/10

'00s average: 5.74/10

'10s average: 4.91/10

'20s average: 6.00/10

 

Total songs per decade:

'50s total: 16

'60s total: 26

'70s total: 35

'80s total: 27

'90s total: 31

'00s total: 19

'10s total: 21

'20s total: 12

 

Average score for January: 5.92/10

Total songs in January: 187