September 15, 20222 yr The podium of bad: +25 Spacedust - Gym And Tonic (1998) [fake version of a dance novelty which was already sure to grate quickly] +24 Oxide & Neutrino - Bound 4 Da Reload (Casualty) (2000) +23 Peter Andre - I Feel You (1996) Painful cover versions: +22 Blazin’ Squad - Crossroads (2002) +21 Mariah Carey featuring Westlife - Against All Odds (2000) +20 Will Young & Gareth Gates - The Long And Winding Road (2002) +19 911 - A Little Bit More (1999) +18 A1 - Take On Me (2000) +17 Five & Queen - We Will Rock You (2000) +16 Sam & Mark - With A Little Help From My Friends (2004) +15 Boyzone - You Needed Me (1999) At least these were memorable chart moments: +14 Chico - It’s Chico Time (2006) +13 Cliff Richard - The Millennium Prayer (1999) +12 Crazy Frog - Axel F (2005) +11 Frankee - F.U.R.B. (F**k You Right Back) (2004) +10 Eamon - F**k it (I Don’t Want You Back) (2004) Not really all that bad: +9 Eminem - Just Lose It (2004) +8 Ozzy & Kelly Osbourne - Changes (2003) +7 Fatman Scoop featuring Crooklyn Clan - Be Faithful (2003) +6 Atomic Kitten - Eternal Flame (2001) +5 Westlife - Queen Of My Heart (2001) [not their worst] +4 Gary Barlow - Forever Love (1996) The podium of shouldn't be here: +3 3 Of A Kind - Baby Cakes (2004) +2 Teletubbies - Teletubbies Say “Eh-Oh!” (1997) :cheeseblock: +1 Akon - Lonely (2005) [one of my top 10 songs of 2005]
September 15, 20222 yr +25 Cliff Richard - The Millennium Prayer (1999) +24 Boyzone - You Needed Me (1999) +23 Frankee - F.U.R.B. (F**k You Right Back) (2004) +22 Mariah Carey featuring Westlife - Against All Odds (2000) +21 Will Young & Gareth Gates - The Long And Winding Road (2002) +20 Sam & Mark - With A Little Help From My Friends (2004) +19 Peter Andre - I Feel You (1996) +18 Spacedust - Gym And Tonic (1998) +17 Westlife - Queen Of My Heart (2001) +16 Gary Barlow - Forever Love (1996) +15 A1 - Take On Me (2000) +14 Five & Queen - We Will Rock You (2000) +13 Chico - It’s Chico Time (2006) +12 Blazin’ Squad - Crossroads (2002) +11 911 - A Little Bit More (1999) +10 Ozzy & Kelly Osbourne - Changes (2003) +9 Crazy Frog - Axel F (2005) +8 Atomic Kitten - Eternal Flame (2001) +7 3 Of A Kind - Baby Cakes (2004) +6 Fatman Scoop featuring Crooklyn Clan - Be Faithful (2003) +5 Eamon - F**k it (I Don’t Want You Back) (2004) +4 Akon - Lonely (2005) +3 Eminem - Just Lose It (2004) +2 Teletubbies - Teletubbies Say “Eh-Oh!” (1997) +1 Oxide & Neutrino - Bound 4 Da Reload (Casualty) (2000) I wanted to do as much as possible to save the poor brave iconic Teletubbies but Oxide & Neutrino is a genuinely good tune imo. Some of the others at the bottom end are no worse than meh, the majority of the list awful (captain obvious) and as for Millennium Prayer do I need to explain... :puke2:
September 15, 20222 yr This round had a few songs that I would not have included. A1's version of Take On Me would have been considered OK if they were the first to record it. It only generates so much hatred because the A-Ha version is one of the greatest pieces of pop music ever recorded. 25 Eamon F**k it (I Don’t Want You Back) (2004) 24 Frankee F.U.R.B. (F**k You Right Back) (2004) 23 Akon Lonely (2005) 22 Crazy Frog Axel F (2005) 21 Chico It’s Chico Time (2006) 20 Teletubbies Teletubbies Say “Eh Oh!" (1997) 19 Cliff Richard The Millennium Prayer (1999) 18 Mariah Carey featuring Westlife Against All Odds (2000) 17 Ozzy & Kelly Osbourne Changes (2003) 16 Sam & Mark With A Little Help From My Friends (2004) 15 Peter Andre I Feel You (1996) 14 Eminem Just Lose It (2004) 13 3 Of A Kind Baby Cakes (2004) 12 Will Young & Gareth Gates The Long And Winding Road (2002) 11 Fatman Scoop featuring Crooklyn Clan Be Faithful (2003) 10 Westlife Queen Of My Heart (2001) 9 Atomic Kitten Eternal Flame (2001) 8 911 A Little Bit More (1999) 7 Gary Barlow Forever Love (1996) 6 Blazin’ Squad Crossroads (2002) 5 Boyzone You Needed Me (1999) 4 Spacedust Gym And Tonic (1998) 3 A1 Take On Me (2000) 2 Oxide & Neutrino Bound 4 Da Reload (Casualty) (2000) 1 Five & Queen We Will Rock You (2000)
September 15, 20222 yr Quickly relistened to 1:30 of each song (the iTunes previews except for the few songs that aren't on there which I YouTubed), I reserve the right to have forgotten what I said about some of these during the listenthroughs as I feel like there are some I may have been more or less harsh on than I was before, mostly the sludgy midtempo ones. Intolerable: +25 Eamon - Fuck It (I Don't Want You Back) +24 A1 - Take On Me +23 Frankee - F.U.R.B. (Fuck You Right Back) +22 Five and Queen - We Will Rock You +21 Cliff Richard - The Millennium Prayer Bad: +20 Boyzone - You Needed Me +19 Peter Andre - I Feel You +18 Mariah Carey - Against All Odds (Take A Look At Me Now) (feat. Westlife) +17 Sam & Mark - With A Little Help From My Friends +16 Eminem - Just Lose It +15 Akon - Lonely Wouldn't actively seek to listen to but don't think they're that bad in the grand scheme of things: +14 Westlife - Queen Of My Heart +13 Will Young and Gareth Gates - The Long And Winding Road +12 Ozzy Osbourne and Kelly Osbourne - Changes +11 911 - A Little Bit More +10 Gary Barlow - Forever Love +9 Blazin' Squad - Crossroads +8 Atomic Kitten - Eternal Flame Iconic: +7 Teletubbies - Teletubbies Say "Eh-Oh!" Would listen to and enjoy unironically: +6 Chico - It's Chico Time +5 Spacedust - Gym And Tonic +4 Oxide & Neutrino - Bound 4 Da Reload (Casualty) +3 Crazy Frog - Axel F Actually great songs (I understand their inclusion here but I am mad that Baby Cakes was added at the last second after I thought we'd agreed to leave it off xx): +2 Fatman Scoop - Be Faithful (feat. The Crooklyn Clan) +1 3 Of A Kind - Baby Cakes
September 15, 20222 yr A1's version of Take On Me would have been considered OK if they were the first to record it. It only generates so much hatred because the A-Ha version is one of the greatest pieces of pop music ever recorded. While you might be right about that maybe, the fact of the matter is that it wasn't the first time it was recorded, so there's never been a timeline in which listening to it isn't directly linked to disgust at how inferior of a cover it is. (The fact it got to #1 while the original didn't may slightly cloud my judgement as well which is less their fault but still)
September 15, 20222 yr +25 Cliff Richard - The Millennium Prayer (1999) +24 Fatman Scoop featuring Crooklyn Clan - Be Faithful (2003) +23 Teletubbies - Teletubbies Say “Eh-Oh!” (1997) +22 Peter Andre - I Feel You (1996) +21 Frankee - F.U.R.B. (F**k You Right Back) (2004) +20 Crazy Frog - Axel F (2005) +19 Sam & Mark - With A Little Help From My Friends (2004) +18 Akon - Lonely (2005) +17 Gary Barlow - Forever Love (1996) +16 Eminem - Just Lose It (2004) +15 Spacedust - Gym And Tonic (1998) +14 Eamon - F**k it (I Don’t Want You Back) (2004) +13 Oxide & Neutrino - Bound 4 Da Reload (Casualty) (2000) +12 Chico - It’s Chico Time (2006) +11 911 - A Little Bit More (1999) +10 Westlife - Queen Of My Heart (2001) +09 3 Of A Kind - Baby Cakes (2004) +08 Five & Queen - We Will Rock You (2000) +07 Ozzy & Kelly Osbourne - Changes (2003) +06 Will Young & Gareth Gates - The Long And Winding Road (2002) +05 Blazin’ Squad - Crossroads (2002) +04 Boyzone - You Needed Me (1999) +03 Atomic Kitten - Eternal Flame (2001) +02 A1 - Take On Me (2000) +01 Mariah Carey featuring Westlife - Against All Odds (2000)
September 15, 20222 yr Author Thanks very much for all the votes! This round is now closed and the results are coming from tomorrow. Keep voting in Heat 1 and Heat 2 if you haven’t already!
September 16, 20222 yr Author So only 10 of our brave contenders can qualify. Who will be saying "Eh-oh" to a spot in the final? Will Sam and Mark be getting a little help from their friends Will and Gareth? Do we need a bit of Boyzone there? Just how badly did Eminem lose it in 2004? Will Eamon be reuniting with his fake ex in the final? Will Westlife manage to grab 2 spots against all odds? The Osbournes may be going through changes, but are they going through? All will be revealed soon...
September 16, 20222 yr Author Number 25: Atomic Kitten - Eternal Flame aztY_fpjJeQ Average score: 7.26 Highest scores: 23 Chez Wombat 16 xajnipi, Popchartfreak, King Rollo Lowest scores: 1 …ready for it, Jester, gooddelta, Alex! Reaching Number 1 in July 2001 for 2 weeks, this was the first single including Jenny Frost after she replaced Kerry Katona. It was also the debut single from the re-release of the “Right Here” album. And so the honour of the wooden spoon goes to the Kittens. We didn’t want the girl groups to get off scot-free in this rate, but on reflection maybe one of B*Witched’s chart toppers would have been a better choice. It does seem a very lazy effort as they rode on the success of Whole Again to cover an old #1 and not really bring anything new to it, though they weren’t the only ones to do it around that time of course. All in all most voters clearly thought this was one of the easier on the ears of the songs here.
September 16, 20222 yr Author Number 24: Akon - Lonely 6EEW-9NDM5k Average score: 8.82 Highest scores: 23 Suedehead2 22 Bjork Lowest scores: 1 Mack., coi, JulianT, jimwatts Number 1 for 2 weeks in May 2005, this was the second single from his debut album “Trouble”. Apparently the label decided to make “Locked Up” the debut single knowing that they had this sure fire hit up their sleeves. This was a late addition to the nominations and has largely defied its critics in the voting. Clearly the chipmunk-ified sample from Bobby Vinton’s “Mr Lonely” is not to everyone’s taste but beyond that I’m not sure there’s a whole lot to hate here.
September 16, 20222 yr Author Number 23: Oxide & Neutrino - Bound 4 Da Reload (Casualty) AZ-27rdwJPs Average score: 9.59 Highest scores: 24 jimwatts 23 DJ Cheeky Magpie, popchartfreak Lowest scores: 1 Jade, chartjack2, Uls2000, Dot Mirrorball Number 1 in April 2000 for 1 week, this was the debut single for former So Solid Crew members Alex Rivers and Mark Oseitutu. Many radio stations refused to play it due to the sample about being shot from the film “Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels”. It’s probably not the most coherent or original record made but the overall consensus still puts it comparatively low on the offence scale. Edited September 16, 20222 yr by JulianT
September 17, 20222 yr Author Number 22: 3 Of A Kind - Baby Cakes aOMSZQ7RacQ Average score: 9.97 Highest scores: 25 Torple, Viper Lowest scores: 1 Mangø, Roba!, Bjork, Bumblebrë Number 1 for a week in August 2004, this was the only single ever released by this garage trio, with the follow up “Wink One Eye” never having seen the light of day (is there any other kind of wink!?) So who knows what stellar career might have followed! This was another late addition to the nominations but another given a single figure score in the end by the majority of voters. The lyrics certainly leave something to be desired but overall I see this as a curious one off rather than an abomination.
September 17, 20222 yr Author Number 21: A1 - Take On Me EbCsIKI6HEU Average score: 10.53 Highest scores: 24 Bumblebrë 22 Torple Lowest scores: 1 CJK 2 Jester, Popchartfreak, JulianT, AaronTM Number 1 for a week in September 2000, this cover was the band’s 5th single after 4 lesser Top 10s. I suspect most people’s outrage at this stems from it being mostly very similar to the original (other than a weird smoke alarm effect being applied to the top note), and the fact that the original is such a classic. Of course in 2000 chart topping covers rarely changed the song much - in fact I suspect sounding like the original was largely the aim. As a stand alone piece of music I’m sure most would agree it’s fine so it depends whether or not you’re offended by its very existence.
September 17, 20222 yr Author Number 20: 911 - A Little Bit More f2r6tSPffQQ Average score: 11.29 Highest scores: 25 rio309 24 King Rollo Lowest scores: 1 Leonardo 2 Alex! Number 1 for a week in January 1999, this was the group’s 11th single so topping the charts was a long time coming for them. Again this one generates some outrage due to being a lazy cover of a #2 hit, though at least in this case it isn’t regarded as one of the best #2s of all time. All in all I don’t think it stands out as being awful in comparison to the rest of the list.
September 17, 20222 yr Glad that Oxide & Neutrino dropped out quickly - I admire the choice to sample the Casualty theme tune :lol:
September 17, 20222 yr I guess I'm alone in really disliking Eternal Flame, but it is a painfully lazy, vapid cover. The power and beauty of the original are completely sucked out. Similar story with Take on Me, I'm more angered by the fact it got to number 1 and the originally didn't, but it still doesn't work, the vocals are far too weak and watered down for a song like this.
September 17, 20222 yr I guess I'm alone in really disliking Eternal Flame, but it is a painfully lazy, vapid cover. The power and beauty of the original are completely sucked out. Similar story with Take on Me, I'm more angered by the fact it got to number 1 and the originally didn't, but it still doesn't work, the vocals are far too weak and watered down for a song like this. Not at all. It's awful.
September 17, 20222 yr Glad Oxide & Neutrino have been spared. The dreadful A1 cover is the worst to drop out so far imo. Now free the iconic Teletubbies from being in consideration for the 'worst' of anything. ;)
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